Yeah if you really wanted him..I think you would have went after him years ago.(even after you were on your own) I know you were shy....but honestly....if you want something bad enough....it can happen..

Now you kinda missed your opportunity....and I think the fact that hes not gonna be available to you is why your doing this. It the fact of wanting something you cannot have.

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Appreciate the good times and learn from the bad times....