Bottom line, the guy has to take charge, but that does not mean it will be good. A few months ago I slept w/a girl that absolutely sucked. It was so lame...I could barely even finish, and she came in droves. But she did everything you describe. She made ZERO NOISE, except when she was cumming (it was still minimal), couldn't be on top for her life, and when I was on top, she just laid there like a dead fish. I remember waking up the next morning and thinking, that was awful...Funny thing about that, was I was at a party the next night with some buddies who were friends w/her and her friends, and one of them comes over to tell us that she was raving about how good I was. I thought she was kidding, but she wasn't. I just made a weird face and said, "Really, I thought it sucked!"