Bear

Well, let's see if I can add a bandage to the wound rather than some salt. First, a little quote to set the tone..."Wisdom is realizing that you really know nothing." Now, that said, it can be so easy to read into something, and be right about it, but then the other person gets scared. I wouldn't necessarily say that what you did or still do feel is lust or infatuation, but you have to ask yourself if maybe all you really wanted to know is if she was indeed the same cool person that you met in a group, outside of that setting. Perserverance is a great thing my friend, but soemtimes you have to cut your losses. Trying to work in between her and this other dude may not be such a good idea. Your girl sounds like a professional, educated woman, and probably would rather have you respect where she is, rather than trying to come between them. However, be ready to dash in to save the day at the first sign of real trouble. Play it cool, be a gentleman, no flowers, but maybe just a nice phone call wishing her Happy Birthday. Best of luck and hope this might have helped you a little.

K-