I feel you O2C. I've been a loner myself too, for the most of my life. Spent all my summers alone,except childhood, like in the first grade. before that, i played with friends, but it was mostly due to my brother as I felt they were mostly his friends. I was always threated as the younger. I sometimes think that maybe it has left a mark on me, made me insecure.
be happy that you have your studys. I should be concentrating on school too, but I just can't. Now I just paint, because this gives me relief. A few years baclk I used to play computer games, it took lots of time away, so i gave up. Now I am thinking of giving up the forums also, because I feel a bit addicted, but I just can't go away because all this good information is here. Make me go away, please.

How many times have you been drunk, btw? I mean really drunk, socially. Do you at least have the people to go party with?

Sometimes, when I am at a party, I just like to sit and feel the vibe, I know its veird, but kind of relaxing for me, lol. People ask me, what am I thinking or is something wrong, but there really isn't at that moment, I am just enjoining the atmosphere with my glass of alcohol.

Do you at least have some friends with the same interests? Yet, with same problems? If you find such people, it is maybe easier to pursue the goal of social life. Like, ever seen those movies where bunch of nerds go out to interact with women, lol.

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