I don't think you are shallow - chemistry is an important part of the equation and if you just don't think you can get past her looks, well then that's it.

The important question is how are you going to handle it?

I am normally a big advocate for honesty is the best policy, but when someone's self-esteem is on the line I'm not sure that's the best case. I don't know what to tell you to tell her but don't drop off the planet never to be heard from again and don't tell her that she just didn't make the cut. You would break her ego along with her heart.

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I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend. - Jack Handy