At this point, i'm all up in being myself. It's the not knowing if she is being real or not, which freaks me out. But the same goes in her case. I could be a lying/backstabbing/pedophile/serial killer who just shows that he's a nice guy on the outside....wait a sec..did I say that pedophile/killer thing out loud again? Um...I gotta go somewhere or do something now......bye....
lol
No really, it's that I don't know if she's over him. I don't know if she really wants something with me or she'll convince herself it's just a fling. I don't know if she really is an honest person with good morals or that she's been a ho or something. I don't really know. It's all about taking the risk/chances to figure it out and I may or may not be hurt by doing so. I just cannot accept to NOT take a chance with her because it feels so good right now. Just like how I said that no matter WHAT happens when I go down to visit her, I HAVE to kiss her or i'll always regret it. And I did, and it was great and led to better things and stronger feelings after we opened up and had that out of the way. I think that sex is a good probability within the next 2 weeks, but i'm don't think that will change anything. Realistically, it shouldn't. Our feelings should grow from what we feel about each others personality/behavior. I made that mistake by "loving" someone more after having sex with them in the past.
But, does anyone here think it's ok that she has already told me that she really does love me so soon? I know in my feelings, that love is something that can grow or decrease, it's not just a snap of the fingers and "all or nothing" you know? I can accept that she loves me in some ways, but that it can be more or less as time goes on. But do you think it's actually wrong for her to tell me so early and that it isn't a crush/lust? Remember that her culture may look at it slightly different, but probably in a more respectful way from what I hear about euro-slovic nations. Not 100% sure though what is fact of course.