OMG you have just described my ideal GUY! And I have the same problem as you do with the not being attracted to guys who usually have these qualities. It's a severe catch22. I think it's not so much a rarity of a girl with the qualities you seek, but more of a rarity to find her and have a mutual attraction happen. THAT is the perplexity. But, I think GB's answer is in the right direction. Volunteering is always good. You meet a lot of quality people doing that. Or join a club; something that YOU'RE interested in, so you'll be sure to meet girls who have the same interests as you. Sorry, I'm kinda lost myself, but you just have to keep putting yourself out there. Eventually you'll find someone that may not have ALL the qualities you desire, but with ones that you can tolerate. And if you are lucky enough to find someone that can tolerate you too, you'll be way ahead of the game. Good luck!