Zekk - your right. I need to think about this more..

The only reasons I can think of joining as of now are only selfish reasons. Degree. Time alone. Learn self discipline. Make people proud of me. To become stronger and gain the muscles I want quickly.

Yes, I know that none of these things will happen unless I work hard at them - whether i join or not. I am being selfish because I am lazy. I have no motivation in life, or at least my mind chooses not to see it if its there, and the Navy would push me and will become my own motiviation.

To be totally honest with you guys.. this is going to sound very selfish and mundane.. I just want to be recognized as something good for once. It's been a long time since I was looked up upon. A very long time. I want to win back my ex. I have for along time now. I don't know if I've mentioned it before. But its what I truely want. Sometimes I let it show, sometimes I dont. Sometimes I even act like I want anyone - just to cover up what I truely want.

I am going to end this thread on this note seeing that the Navy really doesn't seem like the correct choice. At least not now. I am going to start another thread with the topic of what I want to talk about and receive advice on now, since this topic has become irrelevant to the subject at hand.

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Yeah... That's right.

-Billy