Alright... All feelings aside... I think I know what is going on here. You had this fantasy where you and your S.O. were in a situation where you were able to have a threesome. It was hot and steamy but remember, you had COMPLETE control of the situation within your mind. If you wanted your boyfriend to do something, he just did it. If you wanted the other party to do something, they'd do it. There was no stress or pressure on any sides. Fantasies are a scary thing when they are acted out. You no longer have control and what you thought would turn you on no longer does. Fantasies should almost never be acted out. Especially the kind that involve someone else. Like others have said, save threesomes for the single life and experimentation. Never do that with someone you care about. You lost control once the situation was no longer a fantasy but something that was really unfolding in front of you. That's what happened and in order to get past it, you just need to forgive yourself and your boyfriend. Forgiveness isn't for him, it's for you. You will feel better some day. These feelings are fresh. Just give it time. And I'm sorry we all jumped down your throat. We just all feel very sorry for your boyfriend (and you too). We just don't want you to put the blame on him. Good luck with everything. I am going to be lingering around for a little longer if you have any questions or anything. Again, sorry. Hope you feel better.

__________________

"We can live like Jack and Sally if we want.
Where you can always find me
And we'll have Halloween on Christmas
And in the night we'll wish this never ends
We'll wish this never ends..."