Originally Posted by cbee
I have to agree with Clifton. Having been on the receiving end of someone cheating on you it's horrid. Billy's first response was right She's with someone, even if she doesn't respect that then you should until she decides to leave him.
I appreciate that every story is different (so please don't kill me RedAngl) but you don't really know what's happening between her and her husband do you? By pursuing her you are creating a huge bomb of hurt for the innocent people caught up in your intrigue. It explode at some point in the future and people will get hurt. Think you can live with that?
I'm not gonna kill you cbee (not that i would anyway) but here's why...
Maybe i didn't phrase it right, but i meant that he needs to talk to this girl and find out what the deal is. He needs to find out what the actual situation is with her man, if there are other players (ie. kids) involved, what her true feelings and intentions are. Until then, he should chill. I hope you understand what I meant now.
Now on the other hand, if the all clear is given, why should he not try to be happy? If this girl is being true (despite the whole cheating on her man thing, and i'll get back to you on that clifton), why should he not pursue the relationship? Sure the guy will get hurt, but isn't it better for her to end it than to keep lying to him? The longer she waits, the worse it will be. I know this, first hand. In my case, my ex and I are still friends and still talk. We get along better now than we ever did while together. You just never know how things will turn out. Do you want to live your entire life thinking "what if?"
As for you, Clifton. I know you were just giving your opinion, but... you can't really judge (and yes, you were judging) a person without knowing the full details. Yes, I cheated on my ex, but I was miserable and afraid to just let go. We were making each other miserable, but neither would back down. Yes, I went about it the wrong way, but I was afraid to change everything so drastically. But it all turned out alright in the end, for all parties involved. Now I am madly in love. And just because I cheated on my ex, it does not mean, I will cheat again. All situations are different. Don't judge all by the bad ones. Give me a break please
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Then again, that's just my opinion. Best of luck Rajaat. Think it through fully.
-Faby