I think that your comparison of sex to drugs (nicotine) is fairly provocative. It does, indeed, seem that you are using sex like a drug to fulfill a physical or mental urge to escape. Your description of your life does seem a frenzied array of situations where you are desparate to get a high. I would persue that way of thinking and how much it actually applies to you.

Interesting, also, that those on drugs have a very difficult time with intimacy...which seems to be an issue with you as well.

And for all of the unusual sexual encounters where you tried to fulfill your deepest desires you find that one of the most basic desires is left entirely unmet. I am sorry that you have found lonliness so hard to keep at bay. It makes me very sad.

There are a few books on the topic, perhaps some research would provide some insight?