Hi Damien;
You don't sound weak at all, you are just very young and inexperienced! For you to come here to this forum and bare your soul about your problem with this woman tells me you do have maturity but you're unsure of where to go with the relationship.
However, I think you already know the answer to this. Unless she has a total change of heart towards you (how likely is this?) then you should probably move on. What kind of future would you have with her>? She would not be able to have kids with you (at 49, she most likely cant anyway)...at 17-18 you're probably nowhere close to being ready/able to have a family yet anyway...
You know what I would do I f I were you>? Chalk it up to experience and find someone more your own age....heck if you like older women even the 20 or 30 somethings would have alot more to offer than this lady. I know you said you love this woman so much but sometimes you have to let it go...if she is giving you such a hard time now, what's it going to be like in a year>?
You ask: "Should i sit quietly and let her do this or defend myself or what? "
Hell no! Do not sit quietly and take verbal abuse, stand up for yourself. She is acting like a bully and you have to let her know that's unacceptable...
Just me 2 cents :-)
Originally Posted by outlawstar
Hi all thank you for your replies! UPDRAFT, I think you definately have a point in regards to the menopause thing. She is pre-menopausal and was told that by her doctor. You're right about her remark being hurtful and said to make me feel worthless thank you for that because I wasn't sure if it was me or deserved that or what. Yes I think you're right and that she wants to control me, I'm just starting to realize that. I know I sound like a weak person to everyone who read my post before but its just that i love this woman so much and its so confusing for me. MHUSSAIN, you do have a GREAT point and I will take your advice and stop apologizing. You're right, what have i really done that was so terrible except open my mouth and speak. FYESTEEMA4, actually I have a very confusing past and didnt know i was attracted to girls at all until I met this woman, since meeting her I feel as though yes I am attracted to girls and am considering looking for one my own age because this woman brings up the fact that if i had a younger woman she would probably want to meet my family (this older woman hates my family and cant wait to tell them off) and be friends with my family and have my children in the future.But as she's older and wiser somehow she will not bow down to anyone or play nice because she takes a stand for herself and says what she wants when she wants it , period. But yes I am attracted to girls my age and no my guardians don't know about this older woman, no one does that's why I came to this forum to ask for advice, because I feel so alone in this whole situation. I have decided after reading all the replies that I might stop talking to her because it is only bringing me down now. If I continue to talk to her do you think I should stand firm and how should I respond when I feel she is attacking me or putting me down verbally? She wants me to sit quietly and listen to hear the way SHE feels. She said you tell me to tell you how I feel then you don't want to listen, but isnt telling me how she feels and verbally attacking me two different things? Should i sit quietly and let her do this or defend myself or what? Thank you all again for your advice. - Damien