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LostNotFound
11-05-07, 02:23 AM
is it possible to make some one un-shy?
as in more confident, and open and able to talk openly infront of people

Gigabitch
11-05-07, 02:27 AM
http://www.loveforum.net/showthread.php?t=15199

zro
11-05-07, 02:28 AM
it depends imo, if someone has low self confidence, then yes its just going to take alot of ****ing therapy, but if the person is naturally quiet and shy, then all you are doing is pissing them and probably rubbing them the wrong way, either way i am guessing you are a female?? why do you ****ing feel the need to change someone - would you like it if someone tried to change you to suit their needs

LostNotFound
11-05-07, 02:31 AM
why do you always have to swear? its rude!

and anyway i want my SO to dance with me infront of evry1 and he's shy. hardly changing him

Gigabitch
11-05-07, 02:33 AM
why do you always have to swear? its rude!


Actually, I like the ****ing swearing.



and anyway i want my SO to dance with me infront of evry1 and he's shy. hardly changing him
I suggest you offer him a reward.

C172H
11-05-07, 02:38 AM
I think that if someone is naturally shy it will take alot to get them to open up. It depends on why they are shy. If its due to trust issues, then I think the only way to get them to open up is to just be there for them. If they seem down make sure that they know you're there for them if they ever need to talk. Spend a fair bit of time with them too. The more the person is around you the more they'll grow in confidence with you and be less shy.

zro
11-05-07, 02:39 AM
hahaha, even giga swears, i only said "****" twice, you got off lucky, i am just joking, dont take it to heart

is this dancing shit really important? its not ****ing worth trying to change him is it? if he doesnt want to dance, then its no big ****ing deal

giga's idea wasnt too bad, offer him a reward it might work

enterprise
11-05-07, 05:16 AM
I think that if someone is naturally shy it will take alot to get them to open up. It depends on why they are shy. If its due to trust issues, then I think the only way to get them to open up is to just be there for them. If they seem down make sure that they know you're there for them if they ever need to talk. Spend a fair bit of time with them too. The more the person is around you the more they'll grow in confidence with you and be less shy.

I couldn't agree more with that post, unless vashti said it. Spot-on when it comes to me and some other shy people i know. I would dance in front of others if i was comfortable with the person, not as much atmosphere, like if the girl i liked asked me to dance, i'd say yes. if i girl who i know asks me to dance randomly i would. if i had never seen the girl before i'd consider both her and the atmosphere.

-try starting slow. maybe hold hands more in front of others. and so on, and build up.

Edit: about the talking openly, thats one huge hurdle you'd have to help him over and that'd take forever. I'm better than i used to be but still not 100%.

C172H
11-05-07, 05:47 AM
lol Yeah I know what im talking about because i'm quite shy myself. :)

Converse
11-05-07, 06:50 AM
You should like the person for who they are and not try to change their personality.

C172H
11-05-07, 06:57 AM
I agree, but theres no harm in trying to get a shy person to open up abit. When a girl is interested in me and tries to get me to open up I think its quite sweet, so long as she isnt going to lead me on and cause me emotional trauma..lol.

Converse
11-05-07, 06:59 AM
Yeah true.

C172H
11-05-07, 07:02 AM
:) Its just nice when someone makes the effort to learn about you and doesnt make you feel uneasy.

What is wrong is when people condemn others for being shy or make them feel uneasy about it.

vashti
11-05-07, 07:06 AM
I think it is equally wrong to make people work ridiculously hard to try and get to know you. You shy people have got to learn to carry your own weight in a conversation. It need not necessarily be 50/50, but you shouldn't be making people work too hard, either. Be responsive. Answer in complete sentences rather than single words. Show some interest in getting to know a little bit about the other person by asking a question every now and then. Quit focusing on yourself and your own discomfort.

I tend to be a little on the shy side, but I don't consider it a virtue - it is a problem I feel needs to be worked on actively.

Converse
11-05-07, 07:09 AM
That's true Vash. When I'm out with quiet shy people I feel like I have to be the one talking so it's not silent, I hate that; otherwise it would be so awkward.

C172H
11-05-07, 07:18 AM
Um, i'm sorry but I think you've completely missed the point I was making. Shy people don't intend to make people 'work ridiculously hard' to get to know them. Sometimes its just hard for them to be open, especially when they think you're thinking such things.

Me personally, I am shy because I don't trust anyone too easily. Nearly everyone I have got close to has either died or completely taken advantage of me. I do eventually open up to people, but it takes me a while.

Converse
11-05-07, 07:20 AM
Ahhh that's horrible, dunno what to say about that; but I don't blame you for being like that.

Sorry about missing the point lol I do this often.

C172H
11-05-07, 07:25 AM
Ah don't worry! Its not like I don't make the effort to talk to people, or take interest in them, I do. But in general I am shy because of the reasons I stated above. My real friends accept me for who I am and im happy with that.

I think that alot of shy people have reasons for being shy. However, I can assure you that the last thing they wanna do is make more confident people annoyed with them for being shy.

Converse
11-05-07, 07:33 AM
Just as long as you're happy that's all that matters! You seem like a really nice person. :)

vashti
11-05-07, 07:34 AM
I didn't *miss the point*. Being shy is - ultimately - a selfish point of view, meaning you are so completely focused on yourself, another person's discomfort/unhappiness is secondary at best.

Note your sentence:

"Me personally, I am shy because I don't trust anyone too easily. Nearly everyone I have got close to has either died or completely taken advantage of me. I do eventually open up to people, but it takes me a while." <-- That is what a shy person's world consists of.

You need not share my opinion; it is just food for thought... another way to look at the situation. Anyway, I agree with Giga - if you want him to dance with you, offer him a reward or trade favors. I think if you *really* love to dance, however, and he really doesn't, you might have to get used to not dancing at all or dancing with other men.

C172H
11-05-07, 07:50 AM
Being shy isn't anything to do with being selfish. I'm really not a selfish person.

I stated my reasons for being shy so that you could see why I find it hard to be as open as you! I can't give you reasons for everyother shy person in the world, I can only give you my reasons for being shy. I'm not trying to change your opinion on this matter but I am trying to give you an idea of what its like from a shy persons POV. I even stated that the last thing a shy person wants to do is make you feel annoyed.

Converse,

Thanks very much for the kind words. You're a nice person too. :)

Converse
11-05-07, 07:54 AM
No probs, thanx! :)

I never feel mad at a shy person for not talking, I just hope the person's ok and having a good time. One of my best friends is really quiet and reserved but when he gets drunk he's totally out of his shell it's so funny because you wouldn't expect it. (I'm not telling anyone to get drunk to over-come shy-ness lol). I don't think being shy is selfish at all like you said everyone has their own reasons and everyone is different. People like me who get abit loud sometimes are annoying haha! :)

vashti
11-05-07, 07:57 AM
As I already stated, I tend to be shy too. The only difference is that I refuse to make myself comfortable with it because I see it as a flaw. If you are happy with it, though, then carry on...

C172H
11-05-07, 08:01 AM
Converse,

I'm glad you understand where i'm coming from. I'm pretty open with my friends, but thats because most of them i've known since I was a kid and I trust them. Maybe i'm abit different to the conventional shy person but I can open up alot when I feel comfortable with someone.

Being loud doesn't make you annoying. :) One of my best friends is loud and I always have a great time with him. Sometimes being around a loud person puts me at ease.

Anyway, thats just my input about shy people. :)

Converse
11-05-07, 08:06 AM
I'm glad I know more about shy people actually, because some times I do annoy shy people to be honest lol. I act confident but am really shy inside, because I'm shy and nervous I say stupid things I shouldn't by accident then make my self look like an idiot, I hate it when that happens, after I'm like "why did I say that, oh god!" etc. Lol. Comedy for others though.

C172H
11-05-07, 08:21 AM
Vashti,

I guess in order to understand where i'm coming from you've got to have basically lived my life. What you've got to understand is that by the time I was 11yrs old I had already lost 6 close relatives (currently the figure of deaths is 8) including my father figure. I have had so many people over the years just use me, especially ex g/f's, and just dropped me once they had got what they wanted. I have moved hundereds of miles away from friends and family twice in the past few years.

So growing up, its basically been a trend of getting close to people and they've died or just completely used me... Thats what has made me shy. I didn't say I liked being shy. I like to get to know people I meet,but I do it slowly over a period of time. I would much rather that than get close and lose someone again. If that makes me selfish then thats okay, im a selfish person. However, I never turn a friend away when they need help or advice, infact I help friends out almost daily with all kinds of problems. I care about my friends and family alot.

Finally, I have read previous posts of yours and I can see that you do hand out good advice here and I just want to say I don't hold anything against you because your views of shy people.

Converse,

If i've helped you to understand why some people can be shy (well, I guess why I am anyway lol) then i'm pleased its been informative for you. Don't worry about making a fool of yourself infront of anyone. My loud friend often says/does funny things and it always gets me laughing on a night out. :)

vashti
11-05-07, 08:27 AM
Vashti,

I guess in order to understand where i'm coming from you've got to have basically lived my life. What you've got to understand is that by the time I was 11yrs old I had already lost 6 close relatives (currently the figure of deaths is 8) including my father figure. I have had so many people over the years just use me, especially ex g/f's, and just dropped me once they had got what they wanted. I have moved hundereds of miles away from friends and family twice in the past few years.


As I said, feel free to accept or ignore my point of view, but I have to ask - what makes you think any of the above is relevant? Do you assume I must have not experienced hardship or I would understand you better?

Converse
11-05-07, 08:27 AM
You probably don't like people saying this to you but I am sorry what you have been through, I can't imagine what you've been through. :( I hate users, the lowest people.

C172H
11-05-07, 08:36 AM
No, i'm not saying that you havent been through a hard time, but we all react in different ways to bad things. My shyness purely portrays the fact that I don't want to get close to someone for this sort of situation to happen again. It was purely to help you to understand where i'm coming from. But I think you've taken offence from it for which I am sorry.

Converse,

I'm glad that you understand where im coming from. It has been hard to deal with those things but I am really grateful for the friends I do have because they are true friends and have always been there for me (and vice versa of course) It's also made me more understanding too when people are down.

Converse
11-05-07, 08:37 AM
Yeah it's great to have best friends. :)

C172H
11-05-07, 09:10 AM
Yep, certainly is.

I'm sorry to the author of this topic. I did hijack your thread abit and I apologise.

vashti
12-05-07, 06:02 AM
It was purely to help you to understand where i'm coming from. But I think you've taken offence from it for which I am sorry.

.


Nonsense. I wasn't the least bit offended - I was amused. Anyway, the thread wasn't really derailed. My point of view applies to the original poster, too.

C172H
12-05-07, 06:11 AM
Amused by my past? Atleast you can take me losing my father figure at such a young age as amusing.

Thanks.

vashti
12-05-07, 06:17 AM
Not amused by that - amused that you seemed to imply that your hardships made you a special case. For the record, I lost my dad when I was young, and then my "father figure" at 17.

C172H
12-05-07, 06:25 AM
I didnt say it made me a special case.

Think the naive thoughts you want. I personally couldn't care less.

vashti
12-05-07, 06:31 AM
Ha! I haven't been called "naive" in many, many years. You are too sensitive. YOu might want to work on that.

C172H
12-05-07, 06:38 AM
I'm not being sensitive. I'm just tired of trying to get you to understand and I don't wish to waste my time on you any further so we shall call it quits here.

Tired
13-05-07, 11:57 AM
Um, i'm sorry but I think you've completely missed the point I was making. Shy people don't intend to make people 'work ridiculously hard' to get to know them. Sometimes its just hard for them to be open, especially when they think you're thinking such things.

Me personally, I am shy because I don't trust anyone too easily. Nearly everyone I have got close to has either died or completely taken advantage of me. I do eventually open up to people, but it takes me a while.

I feel the same way. When i was in 8th and 9th grade, that transition from middle school to high school I broke up with a girl i had dated for two years, a lot of my friends went to different schools, once we got to high school some of my friends i had been cool with for years got mixed in with new crowds and i felt left behind or betrayed in some cases.

This same exact time period my sister left the family (drug addiction), she just vanished the day after Christmas and haven't seen her since.

Ever since this period of my life its hard to trust people, I fear rejection more then ever, I really do worry about whether people will like me and its a natural feeling I get not something I feel I can control. I'd like to just not give a **** what people think but thats easier said then done.

Before this period i had many more friends, I didn't care what people thought as much, and I could talk with people much more easily.




On the topic of making some one un-shy tho. I'm shy or "quiet" as I like to say and the girl I work with (who i'm interested in) is shy as well. I think more so then me. I want her and have really been the one to push the convo's and get them going. I had to step outta my comfort zone to do this because I'm not an overly friendly person, I'm simply not used to it anymore. BUT, after a while she became comfortable around me and now the convo's are more 50-50 and i think to an extent i've helped make her un-shy, even if it may only be around me.

Tired
13-05-07, 12:02 PM
Being shy is - ultimately - a selfish point of view, meaning you are so completely focused on yourself, another person's discomfort/unhappiness is secondary at best.



i couldn't disagree with you more. How is being shy "selfish", people can't help their natural instincts. I am on the verge of having a panic attack if i have to do a presentation, it's not because I'm selfish its because I get nervous, uncomfortable and shy.

Another example is today, I had a baseball game in an adult league. I think I'm the only one on the team who doesn't drink and go to bars every night. For majority of the game the discussions were about drinking or nightlife at their favorite bar (half of them work for the same bar)...Maybe I come off as shy because i'm not adding to the conversation but I have nothing to add to that conversation. It's not my scene, I'm in no way selfish because I'm not part of that discussion or because I feel out of my place with that topic.

Your acting like because some of us feel uncomfortable at certain points or don't know what to say, we're "selfish". That doesn't even make sense

tooxshort
13-05-07, 06:11 PM
Damn right I'm selfish.

I can be shy when I feel inferior. But opening up is like a "snowball effect," once you can open up to someone and they accept it, then you realize that more and more people can do the same.

vashti
13-05-07, 11:12 PM
i couldn't disagree with you more. How is being shy "selfish", people can't help their natural instincts. I am on the verge of having a panic attack if i have to do a presentation, it's not because I'm selfish its because I get nervous, uncomfortable and shy.

Another example is today, I had a baseball game in an adult league. I think I'm the only one on the team who doesn't drink and go to bars every night. For majority of the game the discussions were about drinking or nightlife at their favorite bar (half of them work for the same bar)...Maybe I come off as shy because i'm not adding to the conversation but I have nothing to add to that conversation. It's not my scene, I'm in no way selfish because I'm not part of that discussion or because I feel out of my place with that topic.

Your acting like because some of us feel uncomfortable at certain points or don't know what to say, we're "selfish". That doesn't even make sense

Jeez, people! YOU are the ones attaching negative judgement to the word "selfish", not me. Selfish - as I am using it - means "focused on self". Don't tell me it doesn't apply. It does.

BTW - actual panic attacks are a generally physiological disorders, not an emotional ones. They are often treated medically.

Mote
14-05-07, 01:23 AM
Here's the thing, I'm completely not shy when Im with my guy-friends, but I get really really shy with girls

Gribble
14-05-07, 01:40 AM
You're only shy because you let yourself be. It isn't impossible to overcome. Make all the excuses you want, fact is it's a character flaw. Either you live with it and miss out or you put in a little effort and win big. That's your choice.

zro
14-05-07, 02:20 AM
not everyone wants to be the centre of attention, to say shyness is a character flaw is ****ing stupid, some poeple are naturally quiet , dont seek approval from others and self confident enough in themselves to only open their gap to make a point or stick up for themselves, some of the strongest minded people i have ever met are shy and quiet, if anything confidence in my opinion has the potential of being more damaging than being reserved

Converse
14-05-07, 02:25 AM
Jeez, people! YOU are the ones attaching negative judgement to the word "selfish", not me. Selfish - as I am using it - means "focused on self". Don't tell me it doesn't apply. It does.

BTW - actual panic attacks are a generally physiological disorders, not an emotional ones. They are often treated medically.

I've had 2 panic attacks before had to go to hospital because I thought I was having an Asma attack, feels like you're gonna die. Horrible. So glad I sorted my 'issues' out.

Gribble
14-05-07, 03:17 AM
Being shy and being quiet are two entirely different things. Shyness stems from a lack of confidence. You don't talk because you're nervous, maybe even afraid. Not because you're just naturally tight-lipped.

Tired
14-05-07, 04:38 AM
not everyone wants to be the centre of attention, to say shyness is a character flaw is ****ing stupid, some poeple are naturally quiet , dont seek approval from others and self confident enough in themselves to only open their gap to make a point or stick up for themselves, some of the strongest minded people i have ever met are shy and quiet, if anything confidence in my opinion has the potential of being more damaging than being reserved

great post

Tired
14-05-07, 04:47 AM
You're only shy because you let yourself be. It isn't impossible to overcome. Make all the excuses you want, fact is it's a character flaw. Either you live with it and miss out or you put in a little effort and win big. That's your choice.

once again, i couldn't disagree more. Your shy because your just shy as a result of past experiences or upbringing or a combination of the two. It's a natural development. If someone is scared of the dark from a traumatizing experience in the past, they don't choose to be scared of the dark, they just are. Sure they can TRY to overcome it, they can take the right steps but that doesn't mean they will undoubtedly conquer their fear.

I used the example of the girl I work with that i like. I've gone out of my comfort zone to try and make her feel more comfortable around me, I've tried to push the conversations and I feel i've been successful in doing it. It doesn't change the fact that I'm still a little shy and hopeful that she'll like me in return. I've taken steps to improve my shyness or being quiet, but I'm just not a very talkative loudmouth person, and even when I've put forth the effort it still doesn't change the fact that I'm just naturally shy or quiet. It's just who I am at this point, and I feel its because of those 8th and 9th grade years i explained earlier, past experiences obviously change people especially at that young an age

Gribble
14-05-07, 05:19 AM
I don't think you know what the definition of shy is. So here you are, courtesy of Dictionary.com.

shy1 /ʃaɪ/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[shahy] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation adjective, shy&#183;er or shi&#183;er, shy&#183;est or shi&#183;est, verb, shied, shy&#183;ing, noun, plural shies.
1. bashful; retiring.
2. easily frightened away; timid.
3. suspicious; distrustful: I am a bit shy of that sort of person.
4. reluctant; wary.

That isn't the same as being a quiet person, nor is it the opposite of being an arrogant loudmouth. Furthermore, we're all shy to an extent. Most guys have a hard time asking women out. But despite this the healthy ones still do it. See, being shy is a problem when it begins to impair your life. I believe very strongly that we are capable of overcoming our fears. The first step is realizing this.

I would hope that if you were afraid of the dark you'd take measures to defeat that fear rather than spend the rest of your life sleeping with a nite-lite.

Tired
14-05-07, 05:33 AM
I don't think you know what the definition of shy is. So here you are, courtesy of Dictionary.com.

shy1 /ʃaɪ/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[shahy] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation adjective, shy·er or shi·er, shy·est or shi·est, verb, shied, shy·ing, noun, plural shies.
1. bashful; retiring.
2. easily frightened away; timid.
3. suspicious; distrustful: I am a bit shy of that sort of person.
4. reluctant; wary.

That isn't the same as being a quiet person, nor is it the opposite of being an arrogant loudmouth. Furthermore, we're all shy to an extent. Most guys have a hard time asking women out. But despite this the healthy ones still do it. See, being shy is a problem when it begins to impair your life. I believe very strongly that we are capable of overcoming our fears. The first step is realizing this.

I would hope that if you were afraid of the dark you'd take measures to defeat that fear rather than spend the rest of your life sleeping with a nite-lite.

I know the definition of shy, don't try and belittle me. If you want to argue with me try and show some respect and maturity along the way.

You may hope someone who fears the dark would take measures to defeat that fear, but like i said originally just because someone strives to conquer that fear it doesn't assure the fear will be conquered.

The same can apply to roller coasters, heights, asking out a potential significant other, performing presentations, holding snakes, bungee jumping, making new friends, applying for a job after being rejected by 10, etc....You can practice all the above, put in the effort, attempt multiple times, but like I said it doesn't mean any of those fears will be conquered or even lessened. For some people, sure.

They experience looking over the edge of 10 stories then progress to 20 and 30 and maybe it becomes easier, to others they may not be able to make it 10 stories no matter how hard they try.

To say "your only shy because you LET yourself be" is a completely entirely false and inaccurate statement

LoveTwist
14-05-07, 05:58 AM
If someone is naturally quiet / shy / social phobic, then yes you can overcome it to a degree. But its going to be harder for you to get to the same level of confidence as say a natural born 'loudmouth' or bossy person. Its the nature vs nurture thing, and genes have a definite impact on personality, so its not all within your control.

However, that doesn't mean you can't conquer your fears to some extent. Even the quietest person at school can improve their social skills, especially if they make an effort. It just takes practice and lots of it. Same as with anything really.

My cousin was always really quiet and shy when she was younger and now she can teach a class full of rowdy high school kids, and give scientific presentations. And I myself have always been kinda shy and was particularly bad at school. But over the years I've got a lot better at communicating. What’s really made a difference, is now I'm much happier in myself... but in the past I had very low self-esteem, especially in high school... Man, I was always picked on. If such a thing existed think I'd've probably made poster child for lamest kid in school. :P ... But now things are very different.... Now I’ve excepted that I’m a bit of a weirdo, so its all good. :D

Converse
14-05-07, 05:59 AM
Trying to make some one un-shy is like trying to get me shut up.

vashti
14-05-07, 07:11 AM
I've had 2 panic attacks before had to go to hospital because I thought I was having an Asma attack, feels like you're gonna die. Horrible. So glad I sorted my 'issues' out.

I know exactly what you are talking about. I had a panic attack driving across the Golden Gate Bridge, followed by a couple of panic attacks driving in a narrow freeway lane next to those big 18 wheelers, and now I live in fear of driving over bridges and next to large trucks. I seem to have mostly "gotten over" the truck thing, but I am forcing myself to drive over over-passes to try and get over it.

Gribble - I like the way you think. I wish you could be cloned and aged a couple of decades.

Gribble
14-05-07, 08:59 AM
Gribble - I like the way you think. I wish you could be cloned and aged a couple of decades.

Why, so I'd be fat and bald? Is that how you like your men? ;)

And Tired, maybe you're right. Maybe some people lack the willpower and the strength to conquer their fears. I don't. And I like to believe I'm not the only one. It sounds as though you have a defeatist attitude and that's a real shame. But I can't make you see things my way, nor can I force you to improve yourself. If you choose not to make changes that's your business.

Tired
14-05-07, 09:09 AM
And Tired, maybe you're right.

that's the only thing you've said in this thread that makes sense

vashti
14-05-07, 09:11 AM
Why, so I'd be fat and bald? Is that how you like your men? ;)


You'd be surprised what I might tolerate for intelligence and a good laugh now and then...

Gribble
14-05-07, 09:28 AM
Awwh. Thanks, Vash. I appreciate that coming from you.

C172H
14-05-07, 10:01 AM
Out of that list I must say I probably only relate to the 'mistrustful' part. But I don't really want to explain that here... Perhaps I am just naturally quiet. On the other hand, when I fly and have passengers I happily talk to them quite freely. Maybe im just in my element there.

Speaking of flying.. its amusing how the 'loud' people go quiet in turbulence. But then again, being scared and being shy are different things. ;)

Charlie Boy II
14-05-07, 10:35 PM
One thing I've noticed - and it's apparent in this thread - is that shy people often nurse a fragile sense of superiority to compensate for their social inadequacies.

vashti
14-05-07, 10:39 PM
... and victimhood...

Miss hotty
14-05-07, 10:57 PM
is it possible to make some one un-shy?
as in more confident, and open and able to talk openly infront of people


I have been trying that with guy he as told he's work mate's that he like me but i can't get him to talk to me propberly

zro
14-05-07, 11:23 PM
there is a difference between a sense of superiority and actual superiority, unless you are jesus, muhammed or buddah, chances are you dont know that ****ing much (including myself) - so if someone just cant shut the **** up, chances are 75&#37; of what you are saying can be considered as verbal diarrohea

I have greater respect for people who know their limitations and LISTEN once a while, instead of just opening up their gap at every chance they get, i also blame this culture of where "talking the talk" is important, anyone can talk shit what makes someone superior is "walking the walk"

Only-virgins
14-05-07, 11:36 PM
You can't make someone not be shy anymore. The only thing you can do is make someone feel comfortable, if they feel comfortable enough they will begin to act less quiet and shy because they will feel like they can express themselves.

anachronistic
15-05-07, 12:28 PM
to make someone less shy, become closer to them.

Miss hotty
15-05-07, 03:58 PM
Yes but how do you do that if they can't even talk to you

Gribble
15-05-07, 10:55 PM
75&#37; of what you are saying can be considered as verbal diarrohea

Now if only you'd take your own advice.

... Wait for it.

zro
15-05-07, 11:17 PM
compare my post count to your post count gerbil, whenever i post i am always either making a point or defending myself, as i said before either make a relevant point or just shut the **** up - most of your posts are crying out for attention, attention seekers in real life are pathetic and weak minded, when its done on the interent to make you popular among your "imaginary friends"...well you are just a ****ing joke

Miss hotty
15-05-07, 11:25 PM
Ok come on carm down don't say something that you will regret or get banned for

Gribble
15-05-07, 11:27 PM
Every bit as reliable as Old Faithful.

zro
15-05-07, 11:36 PM
hahahaha, same old same old, if you are not going to back up your claims then why open your cock infested mouth in the first place, you just demonstrated my point in the above post, some people open their mouth whenever they get a ****ing chance when they actually dont know shit, unlike you i only talk/post in things i know about or at the very least ATTEMPT to back up my claims, otherwise i would be more than happy to sit back and learn from others (you should take a hint by know gerbil)

Miss hotty
15-05-07, 11:46 PM
I guess what i said didn't help then why don't you two take this to PM

Gigabitch
16-05-07, 05:45 AM
I guess what i said didn't help then why don't you two take this to PM

...because it's fun to watch the boys wrestle.

Gribble
16-05-07, 05:46 AM
I can't help myself. It's like poking a hornet's nest.

vashti
16-05-07, 08:12 AM
I'm hoping they will just whip out their weenies to see who is bigger and be done with it.

Gribble
16-05-07, 08:20 AM
You're just hoping to see some weenies. Admit it.

vashti
16-05-07, 08:25 AM
I find a man's chest to be more aesthetically pleasing.

Junket
16-05-07, 08:33 AM
Last time I posted big penises I got a warning from Cybog.

Tired
16-05-07, 12:06 PM
is it rude to ask a person if their shy after you experience they kinda are? Just for the sake of conversating about it

LostNotFound
16-05-07, 11:19 PM
if there shy i don't think there gona be discussing how shy they are lol

Tired
17-05-07, 01:42 AM
i've been asked "why are you so quiet" occasionally at work by people I don't talk to.

Usually it's just older black women whom I don't feel their is any sexual spark between. They work in a different section with me but in meetings they've asked me that now and then. I don't talk in meetings *shrugs*

Chimeros0
17-05-07, 03:11 AM
I am shy ( to get to know ),but I am a clown whenever possible.
Even around people I don't know & have never met in my entire life.
I will make myself known by acting weird/funny or telling funny jokes...
Just being eccentric.
It helps ease the tension in a group especially when meeting new people.
It also eases me out of any long range serious talk & I can give my opinion freely...As it may or may not be taken seriously.
It also clears me having to talk about my past & present, as they are very dark...Very very dark indeed...

Gigabitch
17-05-07, 03:17 AM
It also clears me having to talk about my past & present, as they are very dark...Very very dark indeed...

Well, that's intriguing. Do tell.

Converse
17-05-07, 03:18 AM
I am shy ( to get to know ),but I am a clown whenever possible.
Even around people I don't know & have never met in my entire life.
I will make myself known by acting weird/funny or telling funny jokes...
Just being eccentric.
It helps ease the tension in a group especially when meeting new people.
It also eases me out of any long range serious talk & I can give my opinion freely...As it may or may not be taken seriously.
It also clears me having to talk about my past & present, as they are very dark...Very very dark indeed...

No offence but acting wacKy and stuff is annoying because people can tell you're trying to get attention.

Chimeros0
17-05-07, 03:29 AM
Not the way I get it done...
Besides,we are I talking about introductions.I don't like being serious,so I improvise.
The attention thing sounds like a logical thing,but somehow it gets dissolved when in a group.
Don't quite know how to explain it otherwise...
Please don't confuse me with some attention seeking idiot.
It's my way of dealing with my insecurities & shyness...
It works for me...Can't say much about the rest of the world.
It doesn't get annoying unless you go overboard or don't know when to stop.

Converse
17-05-07, 03:33 AM
True, didn't mean to sound harsh. Do what-ever makes you feel comfortable.

LostNotFound
18-05-07, 03:26 AM
my SO is shy around other people. when it's us we have the greatest time. he goes shy around and quiet around people he doesnt' know. its cute that hes bashful. he's fine with our friendship circle people. i love you baby!! still working on the family.:sad2:

Miss hotty
18-05-07, 03:32 PM
Not the way I get it done...
Besides,we are I talking about introductions.I don't like being serious,so I improvise.
The attention thing sounds like a logical thing,but somehow it gets dissolved when in a group.
Don't quite know how to explain it otherwise...
Please don't confuse me with some attention seeking idiot.
It's my way of dealing with my insecurities & shyness...
It works for me...Can't say much about the rest of the world.
It doesn't get annoying unless you go overboard or don't know when to stop.

I do that but i flirt instead only with guys it's the only way i know how to talk to them without the shyness being there

Ath
18-05-07, 04:52 PM
"If it ain't broke" :)

Miss hotty
18-05-07, 06:48 PM
Yes that right