Is this how a true friend is? [Archive] - Love Forum - Online Relationship Discussion


View Full Version : Is this how a true friend is?

23-06-08, 06:22 AM
Last night I was hanging out with a friend. We went to a dance, then to the bar, and then we went to play poker at his friends house... just the three of us. I don't really get along with his friend, but I do well enough to play poker. Anyway, the buy-in was $3. I know it was small, but the way I see it, now, is I paid a cheap price to see who I could trust. I was doing pretty good, even though I was fairly intoxicated. Both of them had already got their second buy-ins, and I still had a playable amount in my buy in. I kept winning the small hands because 1 I didn't have enough chips to win the bigger ones, and I am not one of those 'all in' jackasses.

Anyway, I noticed midway through the game, the bastards were mouthing things to each other behind my back. I had no idea what this was about, but I strongly disapprove of that kind of bullshit at the poker table. Even if it is a small buy in. I caught them again, and I called them out. Assuming that they were playing as a team behind my back, I called them a bunch of sore losers. They argued that they were winning and it didn't make sense to call them sore losers, and I asked them if they think that justified what they were doing. They gave the jackass answer. I just said **** it and let them have their way, because I knew I was going to last until the end of game, and possibly even without buying in again. Then I won 3 hands in a row, all pretty big wagers. Karma.

I thought it was ironic, because earlier that night, my friend told me that I was his best friend, and he was telling me how I would be the best man for his wedding and everything, and he asked me if I were his best friend too. I explained it to him that I have very few friends, but those I do have, are all best friends and I hold them each the same value, and each one of those friends is so different that they could never be compared anyway. He asked me what was different about him from all of my friends, and I told him that he was the friend that would guard my back, that I could trust my wallet with.

And now I feel like I took in a stray dog, just because it let me pet it. Well I've come home from a hard day's work, and it's torn the place apart.

After I called them out, my friend looked pretty ashamed of himself. I didn't say much after that, and instead concentrated on the game. After a while we got talkative again. What I didn't know, was that 9 beers would kick my ass after 48 hours without sleep. The last thing I remember is having to finally buy in. And then getting tossed onto a bed. I just woke up, actually, and I just got home.

Now I am trying to decide whether or not I can trust my friend. Especially after passing out. I am a little angry because he said he let his friend grab my arms and 'make me punch myself, and make it look like I was playing with myself' He also said that he was going to let his friend draw and write things on my arms and face and everywhere, and I told him, if had they done that, I would kick both of their asses. And when I say something like that, it's like you can take it to the bank and cash it. That's how believable it is. He shut up and then I left his house.

On the ride home, I stopped at a gas station and I whipped out my wallet. Strangely enough, I thought my credit card was on the other side of my wallet, and I started to get suspicious. So I sent a message my friends way, saying I really hope he didn't mess with my wallet, and he says he didn't, but now I am kind of feeling eery about it because I have quite a bit of money in there, You know what that means? If he takes that away from me, there's not a popsicle's chance in hell that I will be the best man at his wedding. I would never speak to him again. Why would I?

What kind of friend would steal from a friend? What kind of friend deals against another friend's hand? What kind of friend would mess with you when you are unconscious?

I'm not sure how to judge this situation.

23-06-08, 07:24 AM
What the ****?

You have paranoia and you really buy that karma stuff?

23-06-08, 07:25 AM
What kind of person would let themselves go unconscious around 'friends' they weren't absolutely sure of?

LW, you need to stop giving other ppl the opportunity to prove themselves untrustworthy at your expense.

Smarten up.

23-06-08, 09:25 AM
For serious.

Let this be a lesson to not get so drunk you pass out around people who already proved they were liars and deceivers.

23-06-08, 09:52 AM
Those aren't friends. They're just people you hang out with.

Get some real friends.

23-06-08, 12:28 PM
What kind of person would let themselves go unconscious around 'friends' they weren't absolutely sure of?

LW, you need to stop giving other ppl the opportunity to prove themselves untrustworthy at your expense.

Smarten up.

I was sure! I considered this man a very close friend of mine. I thought he'd guard my back, not let things happen. Now I am unsure. I don't think he is one of my close friends anymore. Not after last night.

This kind of thing is not persistent in our friendship. There was one other thing that made me just as angry - calling up my ex girlfriend and telling her that he'd like to ****. I didn't speak to him for a year, but then we started hanging out again.

It's like every once and a while he will do that one thing that really pisses me off, that makes me question the entirety of the friendship.

23-06-08, 02:25 PM
What the ****?

You have paranoia and you really buy that karma stuff?

I think it's unreasonable for you to call me a paranoid. I simply don't see it, and the fact that you've misjudged me before, by calling me spoiled, justifies so.

And yes, I believe in karma. It is part of my religion. But it is clear that you do not understand such concepts, because the manner in which I used the word, does not pertain to the religion completely. And just for you're benefit, I will clarify it: Karma, in the situation which I have used it, refers to the event that luck has bitten a person in the ass after a wrong-doing.

Karma in the religious aspect... for me, anyway, is the concept that everybody experiences bad things... not that there is some mystical counter in another dimension that makes something bad happen for every time they do something wrong. Because the idea of morals is such liquid, can be viewed as nonexistent, can be different, or whatever, it is immeasurable. Bad luck, or revenge, or whatever you want to call it, is also immeasurable since the idea of such depends on the way a person thinks and stuff. Same with good luck, and deeds, and whatnot. And therefore, since such things are immeasurable, we come o the conclusion that it's not necessary to assess that revenge and anything concerning morals, luck, and whatever, are all bullshit, stupid, foolish, however you want to call it. And yes, I 'buy this stuff', because it doesn't make sense any other way that I have found. What do you think?

23-06-08, 09:47 PM
i think you need to find a new friend.