Originally Posted by
mistamontiel
aww thanks jinx. about that friend of yours...i'm sorry about your loss. i wish i was a loss...LOL
all the drugs the partying the bullshit...i could've quit and get on with my life anytime. but she was such a loss...i didnt give a damn about myself only her...and i guess that's immature for her
im out of my ****ing mind...i know what you're saying it's so hard to 'face it' or 'get over it' those phrases are so traumatizing for me. it's just all the effort i put...i cant let it go to waste. 3-4 years vanished...i have to find success...those assholes can't take MY friend away from me
sheesh...she is NOT the problem, it's her stupid boy/friends
but then again she IS the problem!! she is so blind she doesn't see past them!! they don't know me at all!! i had to deserve this somehow, but i'll redeem myself someday, trying to build up some hope...i can't let them walk all over me like this :
mista.. you're welcome. but i didn't lose my friend

i got him back to how he should be. i only said that it's not our fault if we lose someone just as longas we did our best to bring them back again.

i jus didnt know it's you who is abusing and punishing yourself.
you said you dont give a damn about your self.. only her.. so tell me.. how could she give a damn about you if she sees your not giving yourself worth???? it's unattractive to girls to see guys who are not strong enough. it drives girls away...that's my honest opinion.
yes.. i know it's hard to "face it" and "get over it" but only for now.. trust me.. you cant imagine how many times i have said that i can't face life without my (jerk.. i only realized too late

) ex bf... that i couldn't get over the fact that we wont be together forever.. but look at me now.. i'm up and about.. i've never felt this good after i got him out of my system.
im not just saying this coz i have to. im saying this coz i've been there done that. i tried to punish myself too from things which now i know was not even my fault coz i know i did everything. it's just good that i woke up from the illusion and didnt make matters worse for myself.
damn!why should i torture myself when the person who did this to me was out partying, hooking up with the girls and having the time of his life?!?!?! he didnt care, so why should i? i deserve someone better who will treat me right.
it was hard.. really hard. i thought i wud go crazy. not a day i wish id not wake up and go through the tormenting emotions again.
so what i'm saying is.. wake up. it's high time you pick yourself up. does she know you're doing tha because of her? and if she does know, what did she do? did she even try to comfort you? and if you will get your self worse, do you think if she sees you , she will be happy to be with you? it's like seeing a sickly or crazy dog on the street. would you go up to it and pat his head if he is in that state? i bet not. think a bit if it's worth it.
i know you love her that's why you couldnt even accuse her. but mista.. you said she gets into those sites and meet those assholes. you said it's not her fault. but come to think of it...
SHE went into those sites.
SHE accepted the invites to talk to those jerks.. so
SHE definitely and clearly wanted those things to happen.
sorry. i know its hard for you to take what i'm saying but i dont care if you willl hate me after this.. i just want to give you my honest opinion. so please...... don't make her look guiltless and punish yourself for what she has done willingly for herself.
just think a bit.
in one part you're saving the girl. the next part you're actually admitting to the fact that it's her fault. THERE'S HOPE!!! hurray!!!

so i think it wouldnt take long for you to realize what i just said.
you have to redeem yourself NOW! don't wait for someday. someday you might not be thinking right anymore. so better get up your ass and shout, "im the king of the world!!!!" lol

just kidding.
but what i mean is.. try to see the bright side of life. those jerks are having fun while you go pulling yourself down and down. how do you expect to stand up if you will just let them trample you? so i say get up! you deserve happiness! we all do!

MAKE HER SEE WHAT SHE JUST MISSED!
