Custom Book for Women (Into the Male Mind)

[GrkScorp]

So.., today I spent the day reading a book with Carla.., some of you may have read it:

He's Just Not That Into You
by Greg Behrendt

Carla called me up.., "omg.., is it true that (blah blah blah)?"
Me: No.., why.., who the hell told you that?
Her: What about (blah blah blah)?
Me: No.., it really depends on the guy..
Her: I'm reading this book.., (He's Just Not That Into You) and it's saying.. blah blah blah
Me: Look.., that author is either a woman.., or some previously unemployeed jerk loser guy.., gone author
Her: Why? It's some of it true though? What about Ben?
Me: Look.., Ben is an asshole.., he's my friend.., but he's still an asshole.., I tell it to him in his face.., that's what he is.., that's what he does.., he's a jerk.., not a good sample of guys to choose to represent your whole population.., If you meet a nice guy.., he's either going to be shy.., or be culturally programmed to be reserved/quiet/shy/modest/polite/nice/formal/etc because that's what's been drilled into his head and that's what he thinks women want and that's how he thinks he should behave.., and that's the majority of men out there.., shy/weak/pushovers welcome to America.., and in America.., this book doesn't apply..

Now.., she comes over to show me the book and chill and watch some movies (cough cough.., the Bachelor.., cough cough.., mwahhahaha).., So.., i'm reading the book.., and some things are right (but that's because they're common sense and general truths.., stuff you don't need to pay money for a book.., just to learn).., but that's as far as it goes.., the rest is complete and total sh*t..

Table of Contents:

Ch.1 - He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out
Ch.2 - He's just not that into you if he's not calling you
Ch.3 - He's just not that into you if he's not dating you
Ch.4 - He's just not that into you if he's not having sex with you
Ch.5 - He's just not that into you if he's having sex with someone else
Ch.6 - He's just not that into you if he only wants to see you when he's drunk
Ch.7 - He's just not that into you if he doesn't want to marry you
Ch.8 - He's just not that into you if he breaking up with you
Ch.9 - He's just not that into you if he's disappeared on you
Ch.10 - He's just not that into you if he's married
Ch.11 - He's just not that into you if he's a Selfish Jerk, Bully, or Really Big Freak

Before I get into all the things that are full of sh*t.., let me get the general truths out of the way.., which are common sense.., but just to be perfectly clear.., (Ch.5-11) all true.., no question about it..

The funny thing is.., Ch.11.., The first four chapters only apply if you're talking about those kinds of guys.., if you're not.., then your whole book falls apart.., so why did he devote an entire chapter to the type of men he presupposes women are dating? Who cares.., I don't..

Ch.1-4.., it's filled with things women want to hear.., so they believe it.., but the logic is so faulty.., and beyond that.., when you know the psychology of men.., (nice, good-hearted, emotionally stable, secure, honest, genuine) men.., this is not something that holds true..

Remember genius.., you're talking about guys who grew up on media telling girls.., and guys.., "no means no! when she wants it, she'll tell you! respect women! don't disrespect women! sex is special, dates and gifts aren't, they're on sale, keep em' comming! wait for the right time, that special moment.., be nice to girls! only guys like sex and think about it, since girls don't talk about it, it must be the case that they don't think about it.., blah blah blah, etc".., and a good/nice guy will do what when he hears this growing up? He will listen to it.., take it to heart.., store it to memory.., and have it dictate his failure with women.. Congrats.., you've just programmed men to become wimps.., big success..

Forget about Goose.., he's 28.., I know Tony.., he's 40.., and he still feels this way towards women.., based on this book.., women he's genuinely interested in.., should disqualify him because he doesn't do something he feels is being (pushy, aggressive, rude, wrong, etc).., if it helps.., think of most men like female prudes.., nuns.., goodie two-shoes.., what's the term i'm looking for? ah yes! "gentleman"..

[misombra]

i have an issue with that book being geared toward females. it suggests we're the only gender who is naive enough to believe a man is into us when he's not.

[IndiReloaded]

I flipped through that book in a bookshop when it came out a couple years ago. Rather a 'duh' sort of book. Good for teenagers maybe as it uses small words.

[IndiReloaded]

Quote:

Originally Posted by misombra

i have an issue with that book being geared toward females. it suggests we're the only gender who is naive enough to believe a man is into us when he's not.

Its geared towards females due to smart marketing, that's all. Guys would never be caught dead buying a book like that.

[GrkScorp]

Ch.1 - He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out

The tragedy is.., the same information battle that women fight to win.., is the same information battle that nice guys try and win.., only they lack any social intuition of any kind.., so it's like their fighing with no arms.., no legs.., ear-plugs.., and a blindfold on.., unarmed.., untrained.., and completely clueless.., and now you're saying.., that this person.., who is so unable to get the slightest grasp on any "hints" of interest a girl will throw his way.., should be viewed as "uninterested" in this girl for his failure to act?

Not only is such a guy (the majority of men.., we're talking 90+% here) at such an informational disadvantage.., completely clueless.. Now.., factor in the urge to "play hard-to-get".., or "mixed signals".., or any other drama & childish behavior.., and then factor in the fear of giving out a clear indication of interest this guy can pick up on.., (girls can pick up on more subtle hints.., and can spot out interest better than most guys.., so they make the mistake of thinking.., "hey.., he'll get the hint".., guess what.., NO he won't!)

Now.., top this off with fear or rejection (failure to show him enough interest).., and feeling like it's "not the right time" (retarded socially created concept).., you can end up with a wave of "nice guys" who will not even take this first initial step.. Not because they're not interested in the girl.., but because of everything else that's been mentioned..

Ch.2 - He's just not that into you if he's not calling you

Again.., same thing.., only this time.., it has more to do with give and take.., and less to do with being perceptive to information..

But guys in general.., guys don't want to feel that this other person cares about them less than they care for her.., If the guy is calling once a day.., and the girl is calling once a day.., that's perfect.., that's equal.., that's fair.., but girls do the following.., either out of conscious game-playing or unconscious insecurity:

They will wait for the guy to call them back.., they want to see how much he cares about them.., and in doing so.., refuse to call him.., they stop calling.., so they wait.., and wait.., and wait.., and it just never happens.., why?

Because for a guy.., guess what the whole things looks like! "We were talking.., we had a great time.., and now she's not calling me back.., I guess I was wrong.., I guess she doesn't really like me.., I don't want to be the loser/idiot that calls her back now.., I can't beleive it.., and I really liked her too.., but I guess she just doesn't feel the same way".., you would all cry if you knew how often this happens..

Ch.3 - He's just not that into you if he's not dating you

The 99th percentile of all men.., on average.., has dated.., and had sex with.., over 80 women in his lifetime.., take a small step down.., to the 95th percentile.., and you get to 14-16.., and at 93rd percentile.., 8 women.., and on the 90th percentile.., 4 women..., it's really a shocking precipitous decline.., and by the time you reach to look at 80% of all men.., they are dating and fcuking just 1-3 different women in their whole life.., (for guys reading this.., it's not a competition.., this doesn't mean anything.., this has no bearing on your manhood.., relax).., so.., if you're looking for a guy.., with enough experience to know what to do.., how to do it.., when to do it.., and to do it all right.., don't expect to get too lucky when you go out there and play your odds..

If it doesn't happen.., it's not because he doesn't like you or he's not interested in you.., it's far more likely the case.., that he just has no clue what to do.., doesn't know if it's ok to go ahead and do it.., and is looking for you to guide him and tell him to go on.., and when all he finds is you sitting there mute.., quiet.., and frustrated.., waiting for him to know what to do.., he's lost.., clueless.., and you feel that he just didn't like you.., where all it would have took.., was giving him a little comfort and to help guide him.., let him know.., not just is it ok.., you want him to move ahead.. (BELEIVE ME! most guys don't have the first clue.., it doesn't mean he's not into you..)

Ch.4 - He's just not that into you if he's not having sex with you

Again.., same thing.., and even worse with sex.., most guys don't want to mess up a good thing when they have it by having sex.., they will bottle up their need and want for sex.., and think to themselves.., "when she's ready.., she'll tell me.., that's what my parents told me.., that's what I heard on tv when I was younger.., girls don't really talk about sex that much.., so I guess they don't think about it that much or even want it nearly as much.., so when the planets align in the right way.., and by some bout of luck she's feeling up to it.., she'll tell me right?".., no.., she won't.. she'll want you to take charge.., be the man.., take control.., and make her surrender to your masculine power.., and there's nothing wrong with it.., we know that.., we know there's nothing wrong with that.., because that's what you want.. but that's very different from what most guys believe.., they were programmed to think otherwise.., so when a guy doesn't push for sex.., or isn't having sex with you yet.., it doesn't mean he's not interested in you!

Best,

GrkScorp

[GrkScorp]

Quote:

Originally Posted by IndiReloaded

Its geared towards females due to smart marketing, that's all. Guys would never be caught dead buying a book like that.

Smart marketing indeed.., could he be any more obvious in targeting a female's needs.., wants.., and insecurites? No.., not really.., he couldn't be more obvious actually..

And Carla isn't exactly any Giga.., Indi.., Vash.., or Mis.., she'll jump on that stuff and think she found the holy grail of male psychology.., it took me hours to talk her out of it.. for immature girls indeed..

[GrkScorp]

The reason i'm asking actually.., despite venting with the whole Carla situation.., is because i'm curious to know.., honestly..

(let's just get this witty response out of the way: if I could look into the male mind.., I wouldn't find anything)

If women could tap into the male mind.., and make a custom book.., very detailed.., about every last bit of male psychology.., what would they want to know? what chapters would they want to see in that book? what issues or questions would be important to them? what are some things they want more answers to?

If you could request a guy to write a book about men for you.., as a woman.., what would you like to see in that book? what would you like to see in the table of contents?

Table of Contents:

- ???
- ???
- ???

Best,

GrkScorp

[IndiReloaded]

Seriously? Okay, assuming you're for real, here it is:

Write the *male* version of Laura Schlessingers (sp?) 'Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands' & try to not make it sound like some 50s throwback.

BTW, a lot of women find her books offensive but I think they hold a lot of truth. And I admire her. She's an accomplished woman but understands things as they are.

[GrkScorp]

Quote:

Originally Posted by IndiReloaded

Seriously? Okay, assuming you're for real, here it is

Yes.., i'm for real..,

Carla brought over a couple of books.., and it seems like there is some conspiracy by either the authors of these books.., or the publishers.., to not make a complete book.., it's almost like they want to make a book.., to act as a teaser.., to motivate someone to buy other books just to get a better idea of what's going on.., and all to explore just one topic.. men..

The male version of: Amazon.com: The Proper Care and Feeding of...

Hard market.., to target a group of men who would need that book.., and expect them to buy that book.. (and even if their wives were to get them that book.., I don't have enough faith in the character of such men to sit down and seriously take to heart anything said in that book)

I pulled up her bio & some book reviews.., very interesting.., I like her already..

Best,

GrkScorp

[Gigabitch]

I think the book He's Just Not That Into You is a wonderful tool for breaking through to a girlfriend who is acting like a retard over a guy. No, it doesn't work as a manual for life, but if you give it to someone at the right time, it can help break the spell of wrongheaded infatuation she's under.

If I were to find a useful book about the male mind it would certainly include a quote I first heard from Indireloaded (and I paraphrase): "Never attribute to malice what can be easily explained by stupidity." The book could be titled He Didn't Mean It, and it would explain the fact that a lot of the dumb shit guys do isn't malicious at all.

[misombra]

we should write our own book.

giga should come up with the title cause she's good with that kind of thing.

[IndiReloaded]

Quote:

Originally Posted by GrkScorp

Hard market.., to target a group of men who would need that book.., and expect them to buy that book.. (and even if their wives were to get them that book.., I don't have enough faith in the character of such men to sit down and seriously take to heart anything said in that book)

You misunderstand. I'm saying to write the same book, but from an actual guys perspective. Dr. Laura alienates a large portion of women, in part (I suspect) b/c she IS a woman. It might have a different impact getting the info 'from the source' as it were.

But you're not ready, of course. Your experience is still too much theoretical.

[IndiReloaded]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gigabitch

a quote I first heard from Indireloaded (and I paraphrase): "Never attribute to malice what can be easily explained by stupidity."

Its a Heinlein quote. Another of my favourite authors.

[GrkScorp]

Hmm.., guess we need some more female input on this.. but pretty good so far..