What should I do?

[javagirl87]

Quote:

Originally Posted by vashti

Why don't you tell her that as soon as she gets rid of the boyfriend, you are going to ask her out on a date? This will plant the seed that you are interested without crossing any lines.

Sorry guys, but IMO it isn't over until there's a ring on that finger.

i agree and disagree with this...i can't really decide yet.

i've had someone do that to me...come in and "woe" me while i was dating someone for 3.5 years. i ended up breaking up with him and dating the other guy...but it wasn't only because i was really attracted to the othe rguy but because he made me realize all the BAD things i've always known were going on in my old relaitonship...that it was unhealthy and he just catlyzed the the break up that NEEDED to happen that i didn't have courage for.

on the other hand...i also had this siutation with someone who wasn't as direct and forward with me but we knew we liked each other without words...i really respected teh fact that he didn't tell me to break up with the guy i was with regardless of how many times i complained about how he was treating me disasturously (sp?). in the end he ended up being the more mature of the two situations, the least jerky and the more genuine.

maybe just be friends witht her...and get ot know her really well...and give her very SUBTLE hints...don't just be liek "hey you i'm good for you, he isn't" because in my experiece the latter ended up beign a jerk and the former was the best relationship i've ever had.

but then again it depends on WHO you are to see if you will be more genuine...but you seem like you are considering the fact that you seem to truly feel for her, it doesn't seem like just some kind of game to you (like it ended up being for the first siutation of mine).

so basically what i'm saying is maybe if you make her realize gradually that she DOES have feeling sfor you, without making it too obvious, she'll start to realize that you are the kind of person she wnats and start to see the flaws (that you say are there) in her current relationship that she might just be too scared to leave.

[littlewing]

You should read signs from her to tell you whether she is happy with her current boysfriend or not. You can try to take up his side if there is an argument and see what happens... no, don't say she has big arms just say"your boyfriend says that 'cause he just wants to tease you for a bit, 'cause he likes you"... or something like that

... thats what I would do.

If she is happy with her current relationship then you would only complicate her life by exposing your feelings and nothing great would come out of this.

[vashti]

Quote:

Originally Posted by javagirl87

i really respected teh fact that he didn't tell me to break up with the guy i was with regardless of how many times i complained about how he was treating me disasturously (sp?).

If you cared about your boyfriend, then no amount of persuading would have made you give him up.

Also (for the record) I didn't say anyone should tell anyone to break up with their boyfriend.

[smart]

All I can hope for is that she will soon see what is he really like. If she loves him truly than there is nothing much I can do.

I do care for her, and am afraid that I will not see her anymore. Because she lives in a town that i will move out of soon.

[smart]

Does anybody know how should I realy tell if she likes me?
She does speak to me and smiles to me, but sometimes I don't know what that means?
Is she just nice or what?

[IndiReloaded]

She will make an effort to communicate more than usual. There are many signs:

http://www.wikihow.com/Tell-When-a-G...erested-in-You

[smart]

But what if she is shy?
I always have to start the conversation.
And how to tell her that the words that her bf is telling her aren't nice?
I don't want to offend her.

[vashti]

She probably already knows he isn't nice.

If I were you, I would wonder why she tolerates him. Seriously - not all girls would. Why DOES she?

[smart]

She probably tolerates him because she is in love and she's happy that has someone.
That is her first boyfriend.
I just found out that they are together since last august. Not even a year.


I just don't know what to think. Last week she asked me what sign I am (leo), and told me when her birthday is.
And also she started the conversation. I was suprised.
And when she started the conversation, she asked me questions wich had no sense. Just so that she could talk to me.
And I caught her starring at me.