How Do Men Think When It Comes to Liking a Girl?

[MissDashwood]

I'm just curious, what exactly do men think about when they like a girl? Do they immediately jump to what's under the clothes, etc. or is there more to how they feel? You look anywhere and a female will tell you it's the just the physical thing they're interested in when they like you. But I am just wondering, what does a guy think and do around a girl he likes?

And to complicate it, what if it is a girl he is prohibited from, like a married woman, a woman in a relationship, or a female in the workplace say who is technically off limits due to a company policy or something? Or better, a girl he is interested in despite being in a relationship himself? What does a guy think and do in that sort of situation?

Is it normal for a guy to ignore a girl if he likes her but knows there can't be anything between them? What if he was initially attracted to her and showed it, but once he realizes it won't happen any time soon, would it be typical for the guy to distance himself from her suddenly and without reason? Like, say he knows there can't be anything and so he finds himself another girl to take his mind off the other, but yet he still likes the other girl - would he try to detach himself from her just so he can try to move on with the replacement? And, would it be normal for the man to be somewhat masochistic and hang onto the girl or keep in contact if he likes her but can't be involved, just for the benefit of keeping her in his life? Even though he keeps it all one-sided on her and continues to act detached but wants her to stay in contact still?

And, if a guy likes a particular girl but can't be with her for reasons I've mentioned above, is it normal for a guy to seek out a replacement of sorts, someone who is very similar to the other, simply because he thinks it's close enough to what he really wants?

What is the difference between a guy wanting to get married just because he wants to begin that part of his life, and actually being ready for it and it being the right time? Does getting married to a girl just because he wants to begin that phase of hs life, because he's transitioned, and the first girl who strikes his fancy becomes The One, does that necessarily mean it will work out five years down the road? How often does this actually spell doom? And especially if they are married after knowing each other for less than two years?

Thanks, sorry I have a lot of curiosity.

[Rob26]

So many questions -- I can only answer the first one now!

When I see a girl and "like" her, it's pretty much all physical for me. I don't mean just her face and body, but her expressions, her voice, her mannerisms. I want to be around her all the time. Just being around her makes me feel good. Unless her personality is a total turn-off, it's not going to come into play at this stage.

[King Zarathu]

I'm growing up, so the thing I'll dig for first is psychological health. If I am in a strong spiritual engagement, looking deep into her eyes, and then I'm smacked with "this person is a ****ing idiot," then it's a no.

[Off2College]

the first thing leading to me liking is always physical attractiveness with face in the top of the list. The next is if they'll warm up to me when i approach them. the next is personality and getting to know them (i'm usually pretty flexible on this). Then next is if they remain warmed up to me and affectionate, then i'm totally in a crush.

Is it normal for a guy to ignore a girl if he likes her but knows there can't be anything between them? What if he was initially attracted to her and showed it, but once he realizes it won't happen any time soon, would it be typical for the guy to distance himself from her suddenly and without reason? Like, say he knows there can't be anything and so he finds himself another girl to take his mind off the other, but yet he still likes the other girl - would he try to detach himself from her just so he can try to move on with the replacement? And, would it be normal for the man to be somewhat masochistic and hang onto the girl or keep in contact if he likes her but can't be involved, just for the benefit of keeping her in his life? Even though he keeps it all one-sided on her and continues to act detached but wants her to stay in contact still?

yes. When a girl rejects me. i totally distance myself as far as possible. If i know there can't be anything between us.. hmm.. then it depends on the situation i guess. Like just recently i'm maintaining contact with a girl that i liked but can't develop anything with because of me moving away for college, but its more like a email saying "hi" hows your summer and all. When i move away, i, and i hesitantly but honestly say this, lose contact with her.

[TDurden]

looks are important but it really is all about her face. but right behind looks is personality. common interests are important but more important for me is have similiar ideology and being to talk easily with her. as far as liking someone that i can't be with i know that that wouldn't stop me from hanging out with them or talking with them, even if it was no possible, like she was married or something. or like in chasing amy, she was a lesbian.

[Henry123]

Its both looks and personality. Her face should look good (or at least average) but if she has a bad personality its a really turn off (in the end).
(Alot of guys would just sleep with you but dump you later sadly.)

[Steven715]

well speeking from expirence i have got to know someone who i was attracted to there personality Only as we talked on the net i found that when she sent her photo i thort that she was very pritty!
This has also worked in a simaler way like if i never realey liked a girls looks and then got to know them and found my self attracted to them because thay had simaler intrests or even the way thay speek to you.
As far as looks go thow i do look at a girl and think hmm she is pritty. i think that looks are the one thing we can relate to when we dont know someone as this is the only thing we do know about them! From this you could say dont leave out the girls you class as "Not s good looking" if you chat to them you may even be more attracted to them than you was first aware of. Dont rule out good protentional partners!

[derm]

I'm just curious, what exactly do men think about when they like a girl? Do they immediately jump to what's under the clothes, etc. or is there more to how they feel? You look anywhere and a female will tell you it's the just the physical thing they're interested in when they like you. But I am just wondering, what does a guy think and do around a girl he likes?

And to complicate it, what if it is a girl he is prohibited from, like a married woman, a woman in a relationship, or a female in the workplace say who is technically off limits due to a company policy or something? Or better, a girl he is interested in despite being in a relationship himself? What does a guy think and do in that sort of situation?

Is it normal for a guy to ignore a girl if he likes her but knows there can't be anything between them? What if he was initially attracted to her and showed it, but once he realizes it won't happen any time soon, would it be typical for the guy to distance himself from her suddenly and without reason? Like, say he knows there can't be anything and so he finds himself another girl to take his mind off the other, but yet he still likes the other girl - would he try to detach himself from her just so he can try to move on with the replacement? And, would it be normal for the man to be somewhat masochistic and hang onto the girl or keep in contact if he likes her but can't be involved, just for the benefit of keeping her in his life? Even though he keeps it all one-sided on her and continues to act detached but wants her to stay in contact still?

And, if a guy likes a particular girl but can't be with her for reasons I've mentioned above, is it normal for a guy to seek out a replacement of sorts, someone who is very similar to the other, simply because he thinks it's close enough to what he really wants?

What is the difference between a guy wanting to get married just because he wants to begin that part of his life, and actually being ready for it and it being the right time? Does getting married to a girl just because he wants to begin that phase of hs life, because he's transitioned, and the first girl who strikes his fancy becomes The One, does that necessarily mean it will work out five years down the road? How often does this actually spell doom? And especially if they are married after knowing each other for less than two years?

Thanks, sorry I have a lot of curiosity.

Woooow...soooooo many questions, but interesting none the less.

Missdashwood your questions have many different answers all of which are correct depending on who answers them. What I'm saying is everyone's different and wants different things from the opposite sex.

In my view (and having many male friends who think similarly) a guy first notices a girls facial features, hair and eyes especially. Then if she has a nice chest/body she gets a higher rating. If he gets to talk to her and her personality is just as appealing she shoots way up in the scale and a guy will do just about anything to get this girl!

However if he thinks she is out of his league or he lacks confidence, or both, he may act strangly around her almost to the point that he gives the impression that he has absolutly no interest in her, when in fact the opposite is true.

The way a guy thinks/acts around a girl he likes...MMMmm he usually fantasises about having sex with her and if he thinks he can 'pull' her he will start flirting, asking her questions about herself, listening with great intent to what she has to say, laughing at her jokes etc etc. He may act strange, may be nervous, may tell stories that go nowhere if he is lacking confidence. Generally he will try to be very charming, funny and inquistive and flirty.

If a guy is dealing with a girl who is married or unavailable, well that depends on whether he see's her as a challenge or a no hoper (and that depends on his confidence again) If he sees her as a challenge he will act as described above, if he see's her as a no hoper. Then he will probably just treat her as he would his mother or sister.

Yes guys do seek out replacements to help them get over a crush on another girl just as girls do the same.

Missdashwood if you really like a guy just come right out and let him know, this is 2006 and we are still so far behind when it comes to putting our egos on the line and letting others know our feelings towards them. It may not go to plan but it beats the hell out of wondering and wishing and waiting for the other party to make the move


Hope I have helped with some of your questions

D