How do you heal a broken heart? - Love Forum

afool · #1 (**permalink**) 29-09-01, 05:50 PM

Hi everyone. My girlfriend and I just broke up a month ago. It was mutual but now I feel like I made a huge mistake. We went out for a little over a year. She was my first love and I haven't really gotten over her. I've written so many love poems about her I'm thinking about getting my own book published. We're still friends so it's hard not to care for someone your still friends with but she's going out with this new guy and it kills me. How can I make this feeling end?

angelwind · #2 (**permalink**) 29-09-01, 06:05 PM

You can't make this feeling end. I don't know how long ago it was that you two broke up, but if you still feel like you are not over it, don't rush it. There is NO friggin' time limit! Yes, she has moved on, and you are still in the pit, but do you know what the odds are of two people breaking up with each other, and getting over it at the same time? They are quite small, if you don't count the people who are mutually too immature to care.

And even when you're over it for a while, seeing her with her first new boyfriend does bring back sparks of loneliness, unless you are seeing someone else also. You just have to ride out the wave, and let time do the healing. You mentioned poetry. How about writing some material that describes your pain, for a change? That might make you feel better. Hope this helped.

sportydoll · #3 (**permalink**) 29-09-01, 06:34 PM

Forgot about the past. There's still a lot of chicks around waiting for you.

Illusional · #4 (**permalink**) 01-10-01, 05:24 PM

breaking up is the hardest part of a relationship, but you have to realize that nothing last forever..whether it be the pain your feeling of love these days. you'll go through numerious relationships before you settle down and really find that one person that you want to be with. since this is your first gf, yes it will hurt alot and it will hurt everytime someone breaks your heart, but remember this, time passes and hearts heal. you may not end up with her ever again, but be thankful that you still are friends. you didn't end on bad terms and you'll see that it's better this way. raverboy

mr fark · #5 (**permalink**) 07-10-01, 12:06 PM

Have you seen the movie ANGEL EYES?

it too, had a man trying to forget his past, and for yrs he could not, until he found a new girl....

perhaps u could try finding another girl?

#6 (**permalink**) 22-01-02, 05:56 PM

You know, Its better if you focus yourself into something that can make use of your time. Keep yourself busy for you to forget her! You can go out with your friends....DO something!!!

joseph · #7 (**permalink**) 22-01-02, 06:20 PM

Keeping oneself busy is definitely one very good way to clear your mind.

#8 (**permalink**) 22-01-02, 06:38 PM

I agree, Joseph!!!

Delphyne · #9 (**permalink**) 26-01-04, 08:49 AM

I too am heartbroken. But because my relationship lasted so long I forgot this one ultimate heartUNbreaker. Keep busy doing things that did not involve him/her and when you think about them...DON'T. Think of something else. Even if you have to plan ahead of time what to think about.
Thanks for reminding me. I have done nothing but think about him since he left and I resent anyone who interrupts me or does not want to talk about him when I do. Even if I hear a song on the radio that makes me think of him. I get inwardly irritated that someone talks to me during it. I have retreated into this little world of self-pity. Time to break out!

MVPlaya · #10 (**permalink**) 28-01-04, 11:30 AM

How do you heal a broken heart?

By stopping the self-pity and the melodrama. Quit the goddamn love poems and this weird obsession you have. You had feelings for her and its hard letting go, thats one thing, spending your time writing poems and crying like its some ****ing theater drama is a wholly different thing. If its over, its over, so stop the poetry and wake up.

IceQueen · #11 (**permalink**) 28-01-04, 12:01 PM

Stop hanging around her all the time. Hang out with other people -- what, you have noone to hang out with? Get her out of sight, and she'll hopefully be out of your mind as well.

aaahhh · #12 (**permalink**) 30-01-04, 04:01 AM

1. avoid her ...at least temporarily, that means shes out of your life until you're not feeling like this anymore or forever.
2. don't sit around obsessing about her, keep yoruself very busy.
3. date as many chicks as you can

...you'll be over her in no time.

SazCam · #13 (**permalink**) 09-02-04, 02:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by MVPlaya
How do you heal a broken heart?

By stopping the self-pity and the melodrama. Quit the goddamn love poems and this weird obsession you have...crying like its some ****ing theater drama is a wholly different thing. If its over, its over, so stop the poetry and wake up.

Whoa, cut down on the sympathy - it's hard to stomach...Have you ever known anybody to get over a situation on their own and instantaneously without any grieving or unhappiness? The difference between real life and a theatre drama is that the latter is fictional and scripted and the other is unpredictable and sometimes hard to cope with.

If you acknowledge your emotions and cry and, I don't know, write poetry or something, in the short term it's hard but in the long-term it makes things much easier - the future will be less bitter and twisted and you will be more likely to display empathy to people who suffer hurt and pain. Clearly, this is something afool is bravely attempting to do...