my crappy story

[Killerbabe]

:?

[Illusional]

i think that you hate to be alone. you're like me in that sense that you're always longing to be with another person. you have the comfort of your bf's arms when he holds you close but on the real, you have to chill a bit and forget all this crap. i'm guessing that you're still talking about your ex but maybe the past is better left in the past. sometimes you have to let go of this that means to most because something better will come along. raverboy

[Killerbabe]

:?

[Illusional]

*gives you a strange look* hrmm...why would you want someone that doesn't want you in the first place? sure you might have had something good before but the key word is HAD. it is in the past and maybe it is better left there because you and him have gone through a lot of dramas and i doubt that he's willing to go through that again. would you go through the same cycle if you had been on the other end? raverboy

[Killerbabe]

[Illusional]

hrmm.... honestly you can go on living in your fanatasy world as long as you want to, but if you want to grasp reality, try looking at things from his side or an outsiders point of view. everything in life isn't always what they seem to be, or isn't always what you wish them to be. raverboy

[Killerbabe]

You're so ****ing right. He doesn't love me. No, he doesn't even like me.

[Illusional]

wow took the words right out of my mouth.. haha. well i'm just giving you my thoughts on your situation. you can agree with it or not. i'm only here to tell you want i think. raverboy

[Killerbabe]

Yeah, well, I just can't figure out what on earth he's up to. Really. It's like every time we meet, he keeps flirting and everything. He just has to keep me aroused all the time. It happened three times already- we just act like friends but then he suddenly kisses me, and I can't even stop(don't even want to).
But then again, he tells me that we're over and that he's not like in love anymore... that's what he said- "Because you were so sexy and beautiful, or maybe your charms, I just couldn't resist the urge, or your charm...I was driven crazy- I was breathing heavy, if you noticed..."
that what he said. But the problem is, that everytime when he does that, I feel like we're not over, and then I think that there's still hope and I can do something to bring us back together again. That's what I told him, and he said that he understands the way I feel, but then again- we're over. So i found the courage in me to ask him one more thing that was driving me crazy all the time- "Do you think we might be together again..ever?" and he said no.

[Illusional]

k, this is what i think of your ex... he said that he can't resist your charms..but on the real, i think that he would rather have a relationship where he can be just ftf. you know?? not having a relationship but having the sex portion that might benefit himself. being that he still thinks you're hot and attractive, he wouldn't mind still fooling around with you, but as soon as a new interest comes, he's out the door. raverboy

[Killerbabe]

Exactly!
One thing though...we're not having sex.
But, again, he IS my friend.

[Illusional]

you're not having sex, that doesn't mean that he isn't trying to get in your pant. honeslty i might be wrong but this is how i view things in your situation. raverboy

[Killerbabe]

No, wrong. he would never do something bad to me, I know that. Thing is, I'm irresistable. :twisted:
But in reality, we're over. I just have to face it, and he, HE has to act like it.
Oh God, I just hope I'll have the strength in me not to hiss at every other girl around him. Talk about his future girlfriend...nahh, no chances, I'll definitely kick her ass. :roll:

[Illusional]

honestly you won't do anything of the sort because you want his happiness, IF you really say that you care for him. raverboy

[Killerbabe]

Sure I want him to be happy...I could make him happy.
But actually, he doesn't realize what he's losing. Fine.
I'll love somebody else.