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18-03-08, 01:11 PM
|  | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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| | | Lost love Can anyone here relate to or help with the loss of a spouse? I am a shell of a human being now and it's so rough because it hurts so much.
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18-03-08, 02:25 PM
|  | Transient sentient. "Hot Love Pancake(s)" | | Join Date: Jul 2007
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| | | Hi Dancer,
There are several older, mature posters on this forum that have been through difficult relationship issues. Feel free to post/vent about your experience if you wish.
The other thing we have here are tons of fun ppl who will make you laugh. Perhaps something you could use?
Welcome to the forum.
- Indigosoul
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18-03-08, 02:36 PM
|  | Forever melancholy "Hot Love Pancake(s)" | | Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Near Vancouver, Canada
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| | | When you say loss of spouse, are you meaning death of spouse? Sorry to be so specific, but I'd like to clarify.
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18-03-08, 06:19 PM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded  Hi Dancer,
There are several older, mature posters on this forum that have been through difficult relationship issues. Feel free to post/vent about your experience if you wish.
The other thing we have here are tons of fun ppl who will make you laugh. Perhaps something you could use?
Welcome to the forum.
- Indigosoul Thank you for the reception, and to answer your question...all I have right now in my life is memories of smiles and lots of cries.
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18-03-08, 06:31 PM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by bluesummer When you say loss of spouse, are you meaning death of spouse? Sorry to be so specific, but I'd like to clarify. It's OK bluesummer, that was my bad. I should have presented with more clarity. For the sake of brevity i'll keep the story short...about
2 years ago while on deployment in Iraq(for the 3rd time) my wife and daughter was killed by a drunk driver in a car crash.
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19-03-08, 01:45 AM
|  | Super Moderator | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Santa Fe
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| | | I think it takes a long time to get over something like that and also a willingness to move on. Do you feel that you'd be betraying them by living your life while they can no longer live theirs?
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19-03-08, 04:50 AM
|  | Phillyboy | | Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: New Orleans, Louisiana
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| | | Daaaaaaamn, dude.
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19-03-08, 08:06 AM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by Gigabitch I think it takes a long time to get over something like that and also a willingness to move on. Do you feel that you'd be betraying them by living your life while they can no longer live theirs? Not so much a "betrayal" as the terrible emptiness and pain I feel every second of every day. Now it doesn't seem as though I'm living at all...I went through counseling for their losses and for PTSD from the war, it just seems i'm dying a little bit each day. D
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19-03-08, 08:08 AM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by Frasbee Daaaaaaamn, dude. I heard that, brother...D
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19-03-08, 08:21 AM
|  | Lloyd is a dirty old man "Hot Love Pancake(s)" | | Join Date: Dec 2005
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| | | Your post makes me profoundly sad. What a complete waste of two young lives. I hate drunk drivers.
Have you looked into grief support groups? You are certainly not alone. You can probably find something through M.A.D.D... Have you looked into it?
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19-03-08, 08:26 AM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by vashti Your post makes me profoundly sad. What a complete waste of two young lives. I hate drunk drivers.
Have you looked into grief support groups? You are certainly not alone. You can probably find something through M.A.D.D... Have you looked into it? Yes ma'am I have, I went through counseling with a head shrinker, but not as far as a support group. I guess until now I couldn't even broach the subject. I was never really a person to complain or co-miserate. D
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19-03-08, 08:32 AM
| | Lloyd is a dirty old man "Hot Love Pancake(s)" | | Join Date: Dec 2005
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| | | I like support groups because they help to prevent you from self-isolating. You shouldn't get the idea that all they do is sit around complaining about their losses, because there is more to it than that. People who attend grief supports groups are in varying stages of grief. The idea is to help guide a person back into living life in spite of the pain, and isn't that the goal? What better tribute to their spirit than to embrace the thing your wife and daughter would want for you?
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19-03-08, 08:39 AM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by vashti I like support groups because they help to prevent you from self-isolating. You shouldn't get the idea that all they do is sit around complaining about their losses, because there is more to it than that. People who attend grief supports groups are in varying stages of grief. The idea is to help guide a person back into living life in spite of the pain, and isn't that the goal? What better tribute to their spirit than to embrace the thing your wife and daughter would want for you? I may start attending a few, I am undecided yet...btw i like your take on the support group idea, thanks. D
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19-03-08, 09:14 AM
| | Lloyd is a dirty old man "Hot Love Pancake(s)" | | Join Date: Dec 2005
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| | I wish I could be more helpful, but I have no more tricks up my sleeve. 
I'm really sorry you are going through this.
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19-03-08, 09:45 AM
| | Simper Fi | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
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Originally Posted by vashti I wish I could be more helpful, but I have no more tricks up my sleeve.
I'm really sorry you are going through this. Your suggestions and friendship is enough...I appreciate them both, thanks. D
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