I can't cum

[Zaphod]

My wife and I have been married for a year now, and our sex is fantastic....It's that I can't climax. I enjoy our sex to every degree, but I feel that my confidence isn't there. My wife goes wild when we make love and she has no complaints in the sex department, but there are just times where I just can't reach orgasm. It frustrates the both of us to a degree that today she cried in my arms and blamed herself for it. My Wife is 22, and I'm 31.

My wife is a total animal in the sac and gives me more than any woman could ever give me. Now before we were together it was much easier for me to cum, the sex was meaning less to me with other women. With my wife it means everything and my orgasms have been fewer and fewer. We have plenty of foreplay, hours of foreplay, and the sex is out of this world. What is wrong with me? It's taken a huge toll on my marriage and my wife blames herself.

I keep telling her it's not her, it's me. She is a perfect 10! She's the girl that every guy wants to be with. We want to have a baby soon and this is getting worse. I love her and I want the best for us....
I am so confused and scared. I have never had this problem like this before..

[misombra]

you need a stunt cock. lol jk.

are you able to cum when you masturbate?

[lilwing]

Stop wanking, stop blaming yourself, stop worrying about it, the more your wife pressures you and makes you feel bad about it, the harder it will be for you to cum. Truth be told.

[bohemiandonut]

"When in doubt, cut it out." - Some doctor.

This applies to any unhealthy behavior you have been engaging in lately, which includes, but is not limited too: smoking, drinking, eating junk, lack of sleep, lack of exercise, too much internet porn, etc.

[GodsRose]

Zaphod, have you seen a doctor about this?You really should see a doctor.And if the first doctor don't help,than request to see another one.I knew a guy who had the same problem and it was a medical reason,nothing to do with porn,smoking,lack of sleep,etc....Doctors are always helpful.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zaphod

My wife and I have been married for a year now, and our sex is fantastic....It's that I can't climax. I enjoy our sex to every degree, but I feel that my confidence isn't there. My wife goes wild when we make love and she has no complaints in the sex department, but there are just times where I just can't reach orgasm. It frustrates the both of us to a degree that today she cried in my arms and blamed herself for it. My Wife is 22, and I'm 31.

My wife is a total animal in the sac and gives me more than any woman could ever give me. Now before we were together it was much easier for me to cum, the sex was meaning less to me with other women. With my wife it means everything and my orgasms have been fewer and fewer. We have plenty of foreplay, hours of foreplay, and the sex is out of this world. What is wrong with me? It's taken a huge toll on my marriage and my wife blames herself.

I keep telling her it's not her, it's me. She is a perfect 10! She's the girl that every guy wants to be with. We want to have a baby soon and this is getting worse. I love her and I want the best for us....
I am so confused and scared. I have never had this problem like this before..

[GrkScorp]

Run a little experiment for us.., don't worry.., we won't tell.., maybe we'll all tell among us.., but your wife won't find out.., well.., she actually will find out.., but she'll never know it was an experiment..

Go down on her.., to satisfy her as needed..,

Then.., tell her to go down on you.. (if you can't tell her.., and you need to ask.., then you need to work on some "openess" issues)..

You'll notice how much easier it is for you to reach climax.., that's because.., in your mind.., your checklist for making her happy is checked off.., complete.., that's done and out of the way.., and now it's your turn.., you can focus on you.., all you.., without a worry in the world about her..

When she sees the results.., tell her that it has nothing to do with the fact that it's oral or manual sex.., but explain to her what is going on.. (your other gf's didn't really matter.., so your need to sexually satisfy them was not really part of your "to do" list during sex.., but it's possibly the only thing on your "to do" list with her).. so from now on.., you want to both establish a ritual between the two of you.., that will make it such that you both take turns on who is receiving pleasure.. and this includes during normal sex.. A simple "my turn" is all one needs to say to let the other person know that.., it's their turn.. (with the exception of when someone is about to reach orgasm)..

Also.., there are some things you're not comfortable talking about.., even on an online forum.., we both know.., between the both of us.., that there are things you want to do during sex.., that you feel she might not be open to doing.., Republican sex isn't fun for anyone.., it's not funny.., it's not a joke.., it's pretty serious actually when two people are sexually conservative.., especially when one of them isn't really sexually conservative at all.., so if there's something you want.., make it known.., and expand the degree to which you're both open during sex.., you should both be perfectly comfortable with telling jokes during sex.., playing around during sex.., finishing on any part of her during sex (without the whole "this is so degrading/humiliating" vibe).., basically doing anything you want during sex.. (oh.., and don't forget to let us know how it goes from now on)

Best,

GrkScorp

[spitfire4207]

Quote:

Originally Posted by GrkScorp

Run a little experiment for us.., don't worry.., we won't tell.., maybe we'll all tell among us.., but your wife won't find out.., well.., she actually will find out.., but she'll never know it was an experiment..

Go down on her.., to satisfy her as needed..,

Then.., tell her to go down on you.. (if you can't tell her.., and you need to ask.., then you need to work on some "openess" issues)..

You'll notice how much easier it is for you to reach climax.., that's because.., in your mind.., your checklist for making her happy is checked off.., complete.., that's done and out of the way.., and now it's your turn.., you can focus on you.., all you.., without a worry in the world about her..

When she sees the results.., tell her that it has nothing to do with the fact that it's oral or manual sex.., but explain to her what is going on.. (your other gf's didn't really matter.., so your need to sexually satisfy them was not really part of your "to do" list during sex.., but it's possibly the only thing on your "to do" list with her).. so from now on.., you want to both establish a ritual between the two of you.., that will make it such that you both take turns on who is receiving pleasure.. and this includes during normal sex.. A simple "my turn" is all one needs to say to let the other person know that.., it's their turn.. (with the exception of when someone is about to reach orgasm)..

Also.., there are some things you're not comfortable talking about.., even on an online forum.., we both know.., between the both of us.., that there are things you want to do during sex.., that you feel she might not be open to doing.., Republican sex isn't fun for anyone.., it's not funny.., it's not a joke.., it's pretty serious actually when two people are sexually conservative.., especially when one of them isn't really sexually conservative at all.., so if there's something you want.., make it known.., and expand the degree to which you're both open during sex.., you should both be perfectly comfortable with telling jokes during sex.., playing around during sex.., finishing on any part of her during sex (without the whole "this is so degrading/humiliating" vibe).., basically doing anything you want during sex.. (oh.., and don't forget to let us know how it goes from now on)

Best,

GrkScorp

This is Zaphod's wife. I was reading this with my husband and I'm kind of confused on what your little "experiment" is supposed to accomplish. Also who said I wasn't orally pleasing my husband?

This has pretty much nothing to do with our problem. We have tried many different things to remedy his lack of climax and nothing seems to work. It seems he is slowly losing his libido and his interest in sex. We have been married for over a year now and our sex is absolutely phenominal, which is where it gets complicated.

We have tons of foreplay and oral on each other and he can make me cum very easily. I used to be able to do the same for him but recently it just seems harder and harder to do.

Please help with any advise. I can see how much this frustrates him, so in turn it frustrates me. I don't know what to do to help him and I really wish I did.

[vashti]

Meh, ignore Grkscorp. His advice is not meant for married people or females, but rather for very young males, and he means no harm.

Assuming you are able to ejaculate with masturbation, I think your problem is simply anxiety. You might want to see a physician and have your testosterone levels checked, and I agree with donut about cutting out caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, pornography, and masturbation.

[spitfire4207]

Yeah, I guess we forgot to mention that before. He can't cum even when masturbating. He's tried but he has to do it so hard that he ends up making himself sore and still isn't able to. This has only started happening recently.

[vashti]

Is he able to maintain an erection?

[DoesntMatter]

I bet Dharmic can get you to cum

[bohemiandonut]

Quote:

Originally Posted by spitfire4207

This is Zaphod's wife. I was reading this with my husband and I'm kind of confused on what your little "experiment" is supposed to accomplish. Also who said I wasn't orally pleasing my husband?

BAhahahahah!

[Zaphod]

Quote:

Originally Posted by vashti

Is he able to maintain an erection?

Yeah.... But It's hard sometimes.

I take medication that can damage my libido, but it's never been a problem like this before....I've been taking them for years with out a problem. It's like I'm losing my libido......

[enterprise]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zaphod

Yeah.... But It's hard sometimes.

I take medication that can damage my libido, but it's never been a problem like this before....I've been taking them for years with out a problem. It's like I'm losing my libido......

speak to your doctor about alternative medication?

[Tiay]

Quote:

Originally Posted by vashti

Is he able to maintain an erection?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zaphod

Yeah.... But It's hard sometimes.

ok, i'm sorry, but that was hilarious.