Originally Posted by
bohemiandonut 
If you found out your fairly good friend was dating your ex would you at least break him in his pretty face?
Why? There's no point.., that does nothing but make you look like the aggressor.., a guy who got angry over some loss of something that was valuable to him.., implying that you care.., and making you come out looking like a fool.. I know it's an urge.., but if we would listen to every urge we get.., we'd find ourselves in jail very quickly.. Not only is "he" not worth it.., "she"'s not worth is..
Originally Posted by
bohemiandonut Also, do you think I should at least find out who it is or if it is so I can fully rationalize her laughable downgrade and utter blindness to my supremacy? I'm sure I could.
You know.., sometimes.., it's not about being better than that other guy..
It's all about how you make the other person feel.., and there comes a point.., and very quickly with some guys.., that their girl feels that they're next to this great-looking guy.., who is smart.., and rich.., and such a great person.., blah blah.., and when that initial intoxication fades from her wanting to be with someone like that.., and show the rest of the world who she's with.., it finally starts to hit her..
"Why does he like me? What does he find in me?".., and slowly.. you end up with one of two things.. (1). a very insecure girlfriend.., or (2). a very unhappy girlfriend who feels lesser to you in some way or another (or worse; in every way).., in a relative sense..
If she's cute.., but you're gorgeous.., then she doesn't feel as attractive or good-looking anymore.., if she's smart.., but you're a natural genuis & overachiever.., then she feels stupid around you.., if she is working in a respectable job and earning a respectable income.., but you're loaded.., then she feels like she's not helping financially.., if she feels that she's a good person.., nice and kind.., but she can see for herself that you're clearly an amazing individual with so much love for others and would make perhaps a better parent than her.., then what the hell does she have left? What is her role or use in this relationship? Where can she feel needed or useful?
This is why you often hear girls say things like:
"I don't think I could date someone who's better looking than me"
"I couldn't ever be in a relationship with someone who was too smart"
So.., there's no doubt that this other guy could very well be inferior to you in some way or another.., or even in every single way.. But all that does matter is that this other guy does make her feel good about herself.. she gets to enjoy the feeling of being with someone where she is (more attractive.., or smarter.., or makes more money.., or is a better person.., etc).., his inferiority gives her that feeling of feeling good about herself.., something she was perhaps lacking with your relationship.., so she enjoys this feeling with him now..
It will eventually fade.., it really will.., i'm not saying that the way your mother would tell you.., (it's ok BD.., you did your best.., that's all that counts.., what goes around comes around.. you'll find someone else).., do I look like your mother? No.., all i'm saying is that eventually.., her intoxication with the feeling of feeling superior to the guy she's with will fade.., and she'll want someone better.. in some particular department.. or in every department.., and in time.., this new guy will be in a similar position you are in.. only he will be in a worse position.., knowing that she left him for someone "better than him".., and that's GOT to hurt..
Best,
GrkScorp
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