insert embarassing title here

[chrisodeo]

Umm. I've got a problem. Not that big a problem, compared to some of the others here. Me and my gf haven't really had sex yet. But we have let our fingers roam around a little. You know what I mean. My problem is this: I can't seem to get her to orgasm. I've read about just what to do, relax, etc. Seems like she's about to, but then she says that that particular area is feeling kind of sore. I dunno. I think part of it is she's never had one before. Hasn't explored herself, or anything. So the old "get her to tell you what feels good" adage just doesn't apply. Does it? I guess what I'm asking is, what can I do?

[yennichua]

all i can say... relax....

one thing you gotta remember is that girls are extremely different than guys when it comes to having an orgasm. with guys, as you probably know, if you just sit there and jack off.. after a few minutes juice will be all over the place. it takes a single motion for a guy. with girls, you have to soothen all things at once.. like, kissing her neck, rubbing her back, telling her you love her, finding her sweet spot, making her moan.. all at the same time. this also has to be done very gently.

oh yes.. by the way... relax ;-) hahahah just messin' with ya

[chrisodeo]

All right, lemme rephrase this.

I've read the techniques here, relax, foreplay, everything. I get down there and start working some pokage, but a bit later she asks me to try it somewhere else. Says it feels like she needs to pee really badly when I mess with certain spots. I'm wondering: is it because she's close to orgasm? Comparing what I've read and what she does, it looks like it. But then why would she ask me to try somewhere else? I do hope someone can help, because I don't want to wonder "what if", and have her accidentally pee on me. That'd be just a tad embarassing.

[Canibus]

The needing to pee feeling is when they are getting close to orgasm apparently.
Remember too lots of women never orgasm and alot only do it when they reach 30.
So don't put pressure on her or yourself or anything like that. Just take it slowly. And maybe talk dirty to her - create fantasies that would take her mind away from thinking about the orgasm (cos that can ruin it). Hope this helps!

[BillyGalbreath]

Never stay in one spot - even if she likes it alot in that one spot - move around - constantly switching spots every few seconds. Keep her guessing where your going. You may hit a sweet spot and she will start orgasming - dont think about, dont pay attention to it. keep moving spots - she will come down from that orgasm quickly when you move spts and she will want more - and the anticipation she will feel will overall become part of the orgasm when it is finally reached.

I hope that made sence. Because it works like a charm for me.

[nendo]

yeh the about to pee is her "cum" and thats when the womans orgasm. i havn't actualy been intermite with a woman yet sexualy that is but i'v heard alot about it from friends. and they've said it was good. but like someone said above don't put pressure on her. if she finaly desides to let it out before orgasm then y not do it in the bath then that way its easy to clean up.

[Bonovox40]

How old are you two? Age usually does have a relative factor. Some women just aren't mature enough yet at a young age to completely enjoy the whole love making aspect and understand their bodies to boot. Plus, past experience can help or hinder reaching orgasm. My last gf was raped and abused and only after a lot of work and patience and trusting of me, was she able to reach that and even then it was infrequent and frustrating to her because that she finally orgasmed, she wanted to EVERY time! She still didn't understand how it really happened, and what it took to reach it. ALOT of it is mental. She would get frustrated during the act wondering "Is it going to happen? Why haven't I come yet?" etc. As a result, it wouldn't happen very often.

My current gf was able to orgasm constantly with her ex, but she said with me they were the most incredible she's ever had thanks in part to our emotional connection, and that I actually GIVE her emotion during sex. (which is VERY important to women) I'm happy that she's the kind of women that can get off every time, BUT with feeling and desire and love that she expresses for me, it's a mind blowing experience for her. We've only had sex about 5 times, but she said that it was the best that she's had in 5 years of being sexually active. I don't count that as to having some special tricks or techniques or being a Ron Jeremy equal. It's that we both care and love each other and desire to share an emotional, physical and spiritual bond together. Nothing makes love making more intense than feeling that!

But be patient and most of all DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT! Remember that the goal of sex isn't to have an orgasm. It's to have fun, and enjoy each other while sharing and expressing emotional and physical pleasure and desire. (And in some cases to reproduce) :-P If you make her feel that she HAS to have an orgasm, it's seriously going to impede it from occuring or make her think she has to fake it to make you happy, thus ruining the point of sex. COMMUNICATE! It's the next best thing in bed to having sex. Why not talk about sex while being in the place where you do have sex? So many people seem to think it's taboo to ask/talk/discuss ANYTHING in bed but it's so easy to do and can make such a difference. Like with my ex, she thought that I felt it was a big deal that she couldn't orgasm during sex. I said that I didn't care as long as we had fun and enjoyed each other. One time, out of the blue it just happened. She told me that her mind was cleared and not worried about life/school/sex and BANG! She came. Same with Betty, she thought that we had to come TOGETHER for it to be enjoyable to me. (since he ex made her do that, which actually is a very good skill to be able to control your body enough to delay an orgasm indefinatly. Very fun to have her ask "How much longer do you want me to die!?" hehe)
But I told her to just go and finish and right after she did, I did and she said it felt amazing to actually feel that rush from both of us.
I didn't mean to go on, i'm just saying that everyone is different and she might be feeling somethign that you might not understand. So talk, have fun and be safe!

[KissingBlood]

not all girls orgasm so as long as it feels good it counts.

what would ever posess someone to pierce their nipples? I don't know Satan? ~ Adora