Fiancee not interested in sex

[neons69]

Hi all,

I am new to this forum, but I have a problem, thought someone might have some input.

I have been with my fiancee for 10 months, and are planning on getting married May 29, 2004.

When we were first together, she wanted sex all the time. I was unable to keep up with her desires. She wanted sex multiple times a day every day.

I did my best to keep up, but at times, I was unable to.

Now the roles have reversed. She only seems to want sex once every week or two. Every once in a while, she will initiate sex, but not the way she use to. Now it's more like her just saying do you want to have sex.

To me this isn't really a turn on. Yes I do want sex with her, but I don't want it to be the same as asking me to take out the trash.

I like to be a little romantic, some kissing and heavy petting, and then it just happens.

I love this girl more than I can think of, but I'm wondering if maybe it's the whole getting married thing that is bothering her?//

She says it's school and family that bother her, but that she just doesn't have any sexual desire right now.

Any help you all could offer would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Greg

[Illusional]

hrmm... one suggestion that i will present you with is maybe she knew that she could have sex with you whenever you wanted. ask yourself this, have you been the one to iniciate sex and get things started or was she the person who always would drive the flame...?

sometimes when you can have something all the time, it's not the same. give her some times to relax and calm down with her schooling and family. and when she doesn't expect anything, say after she comes home from work, throw her down on the floor and surprize her. i dunno, pick something that will suit your relationship with her. maybe a romantic dinner after she has had a long day at work and studying. something different and see how things go from there. raverboy

[neons69]

Thanks Raver,

I am just not the type that is very good at initiating sex. I get into it, but always hard to initiate. I am always waiting for the right time. I just am unsure of how to make it the right time.

I am a nightclub owner, so not very often can I do the normal "date" kind of thing.

Both of my clobs close at 5AM, and that makes it a little hard to be spontaneous. Our days are a little busy, and by the time I get home at 6 to 7AM, we are both pretty tired.

I try to take time off, and sometimes that helps. I just wish I was able to grab her when she gets home from class, and do the things I would like. I'm just not always sure how to do that.

I have been with a lot of women, and in the beginning, it always seems to be spontaneous, but it seems so hard to maintain that intensity, no matter how attracted you are to the other person.

I guess I just need to figure out how to get the flame back.

For Both of us.

Thanks and any more advice would be appreciated.

Greg

[Illusional]

well i don't think she could be comming home that late. i mean the clubs scene opens at what..?? maybe 8pm at the earliest? i dunno. but i think if you really wanna do something for someone, you'll find the time and put in the effort. raverboy