How? - Love Forum

jaslovesant · #1 (**permalink**) 27-04-05, 07:07 PM

I'm always trying new things, and I want my boyfriend to make out my fantasy...I'm not going to tell you people 'cause...you know. But I'm sooo embarrassed to ask him..! but I'm always hoping he'll think of the idea himself and just go for it! It's not dress-up sex and doesn't involve toys but it's just something that would get me going.......how do you people hint to your partners? thats what I wanna know.

KirstyM · #2 (**permalink**) 27-04-05, 11:46 PM

Pick the right moment, bring up the subject sometime, ask him if he has any fantasies, then tell him yours too. It probably isnt at all as embarrassing as you think, share it with him. You only have to go on enough about how much that it would turn you on and I bet he'll do it.

daletom · #3 (**permalink**) 28-04-05, 03:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaslovesant

.......how do you people hint to your partners? thats what I wanna know.

When my wife & I were first married and just learning about sex (and still kinda shy actually talking about some topics) we would sometimes put a little note in the "Joy of Sex" book. Maybe something like "Page 147", or just a slip of paper at a particular page. Then leave it under the other's pillow, or in a dresser drawer. Nowdays you could do something similar by emailing an internet link, or load it into his browser's "Favorites" when he isn't looking. Or find an account of something similar to what you want, print it out, and give it to him with a note like, "This sounds like fun!".

Kiss-and-tell time: It might get out of hand. One time I found a note in my lunch, something like "JofS pg 352". That day she was providing some elderly home care, and wouldn't be home until around 1AM. I went home to an empty house, made dinner, and finally found the "Joy of Sex" - and the page she mentioned was one page number more than the last page in the book. She had left a note to the effect "April Fool! You ain't getting none tonight!" It was April 1st . . . and when she did that particular job assignment, we always made love in the morning anyway so the "ain't getting none tonight" part really didn't mean much. It was just the tone of voice that she wrote it in . . .

So I decided to "get even". When she walked into a dark house and went to hang up her coat, I jumped from the closet, threw a blanket over her head and proceded to "have my way with her". She figured out that it was me pretty quickly, but the first minute or so was too realistic and too terrifying for her, and I had to promise to NEVER do anything like that again!

jaslovesant · #4 (**permalink**) 28-04-05, 04:55 PM

Thanks for all the ideas... and daletom i like the way you and wife use notes, that's really cool...and i suppose if i tried that it'd be less embarrassing to ask - so i might start trying something like that. Thank you

daletom · #5 (**permalink**) 29-04-05, 03:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaslovesant

I'm always trying new things, and I want my boyfriend to make out my fantasy...I'm not going to tell you people 'cause...you know. But I'm sooo embarrassed to ask him..! ......how do you people hint to your partners?

Here's another approach, but it's a bit more obvious than "hinting". Here in the U.S. we have 2 general circulation women's magazines ("Redbook" and "Cosmopolitan") that seem to always feature some survey or interviews of a sexual nature. Every month brings a new variation of "What's your favorite position?", "Where is the most romantic place you've ever done 'it'?", "What are the biggest turn-ons for men?", etc. I suspect you can get these mags in the U.K., or you may have your own periodicals of a similar nature. Get a copy or two - or go thru a stack of back issues at the library and photocopy some pages. Sit down with your lover and discuss the survey "results" together. Conversation starters would be things like, "Do you agree wit the majority here that two women pleasing each other is the most erotic thing you can imagine?", "Are you in the minority who have tried sex outdoors?", etc. You can learn a lot about your partner that way - and pick up some good ideas.

daletom · #6 (**permalink**) 09-05-05, 04:02 AM

OK - so tell us how you gave your hint & how it went. I'm sure somebody else will appreciate learning from your experience!

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaslovesant

Thanks for all the ideas... and daletom i like the way you and wife use notes, that's really cool...and i suppose if i tried that it'd be less embarrassing to ask - so i might start trying something like that. Thank you

jaslovesant · #7 (**permalink**) 11-05-05, 07:32 PM

Thanks for all the tips and everything, I'm hoping to get him on his own tonight. I'm just really pissed off though everyone...I have noticed I'm always the one DOING ORAL I'm always the TRYING IT ON...and I'm getting really annoyed, it's a totally different problem to my first post in this thread but please help me he has got so boring I swear!! And where he doesn't bother doing foreplay on me or atleast trying to get my moist sex hurts, and when I moan that it hurts he says I'll be alright inna minute. Sorry but I'm well pissed off, sounds sad but I think he's too lazy nowadays.

daletom · #8 (**permalink**) 12-05-05, 06:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaslovesant

Thanks for all the tips and everything, I'm hoping to get him on his own tonight. I'm just really pissed off though everyone...I have noticed I'm always the one DOING ORAL I'm always the TRYING IT ON...and I'm getting really annoyed, it's a totally different problem to my first post in this thread but please help me he has got so boring I swear!! And where he doesn't bother doing foreplay on me or atleast trying to get my moist sex hurts, and when I moan that it hurts he says I'll be alright inna minute. Sorry but I'm well pissed off, sounds sad but I think he's too lazy nowadays.

Not sure I know exactly what the question is, but consider this: It turns me on to know that my wife is horny, and wants a good f*** as much as I do - and she lets me know by getting on top in a 69. She usually doesn't do much directly to me, but lets me know what she wants by how she positions herself against my face. (Of course, KNOWING what she wants, and DOING it, are not the same - and she knows how I like to hear her say, in a raised voice, "I want that tongue back in there NOW!!".) And it's easy for her to either turn around ("cowgirl style") or shift down ("reverse cowgirl") when she's ready for insertion. Both of these positions, of course, give her a lot of control over speed, depth, angles, etc.