Newbie

[natashab]

Hi,

Very happy to have found this forum. It seems to be filled with kind, experienced people offering good advice.

Going through a painful break-up/strange situation now and found this site whilst in search of some clarity. It's also stopped me checking my phone for (hoped for) calls and messages from the ex!

Have posted my problem in Dumping Talk.... any advice would be really appreciated.

x

[Illusional]

exactly.. why live your life in the past, move towards the future.

raverboy

[natashab]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Illusional

exactly.. why live your life in the past, move towards the future.

True, true, true ... but I think you can only move towards the future if you believe in your future - if you trust that it'll be ok, that you're ok, that you deserve good things and that they'll come in time.

If you don't, and you fear your future, it's so easy to cling to the past.

Break-ups, especially one-sided break-ups, leave the 'dumpee' frightened of their potential future, making them cling onto their past even tighter.

[bohemiandonut]

The future is like the pool below a high dive, once you're swimming in it it doesn't seem nearly so threatening, and the fear you felt looking at it becomes nothing but a vague memory.

Instead of worrying about the future, embrace the present. It's here, isn't it? And it's waiting for you to play with it.

Peace.

[natashab]

Quote:

Originally Posted by bohemiandonut

Instead of worrying about the future, embrace the present. It's here, isn't it? And it's waiting for you to play with it.

That's a nice take on it. Good advice. Thanks.

[Raverboy808]

natashab... obviously you have not seen my tattoo... it says "live for the moment". that's right, i feel that clinging onto the past is a a life wasted, and worrying about the future is a life filled with too much anxiety. life your life like you will die tomorrow.

raverboy

[natashab]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raverboy808

natashab... obviously you have not seen my tattoo... it says "live for the moment". that's right, i feel that clinging onto the past is a a life wasted, and worrying about the future is a life filled with too much anxiety. life your life like you will die tomorrow.

Sounds great and all, it really does, ..... but is that how you really live your life? What about when you're heartbroken or torn up about something? It's very hard not to look back and regret things, or yearn for things you have lost, like a loved one.

Sometimes I think things are easy to say, but not so easy to do. But if you DO live your life like that.... TELL ME YOUR SECRET!

[Illusional]

haha a lost love?? i think that it things didn't last, then f*ck it. it ended for a reason. when you regret things it life, you're only feeling sorry for yourself for a mistake that you have made. instead learn from those mistakes and hopefully you won't make the same one twice. i will admit that i have made a lot of mistakes in my lifetime, however, i don't regret any of them. they are the steps that teach me about life so i look at it moreso as a learning process.

raverboy