Expressing myself - Love Forum

Bryne · #1 (**permalink**) 02-09-03, 11:13 PM

Well, usual teenage problem, just as you thought..
The story goes like that:
well, I've got a crush on my classmate. In the future, I would like her to be my girlfriend. You ask, why not now? Because I think I'm not ready, for example, if I ever was that brave to ask her to movies or something like that, I wouldn't be able to say/ask absolutely anything or be "normal".
What does she think about me? We are now in the 9th grade and during these whole years, I've never had a feeling that she "doesn't like me". I think the feelings she has, are totally neutral. She doesn't speak to me much, but I've had my moments, where I have talked to her, but what I WOULD like, is a friendship, a very good one.
So, I ask you all, how can I make friends with her?
I am not ready for a relationship, as I explained above (I'm only 15 years old, but not so mature, I think <-- is that weird?), but I want to be a good friend to her right now.
Some friends of mine suggested staring at her at school, smiling..
That's what I'm trying to do every day right now...
I know that there's no "recepy" to get a girl, but just let me know what you think...

iamback · #2 (**permalink**) 03-09-03, 10:01 AM

HI Bryne,
See u are in something like myself, or atleast were.
Tryy to be natural, serious, helpful, and a bit romantic, main thing: dont try to be stupid, and i guess IF SHE is interested, she will respond / show somekind of reaction.

Another thing: have patience........

Hoss · #3 (**permalink**) 03-09-03, 10:19 AM

Most likely, if you try to be different from who you are, there's a good chance everything could cave in. So just be urself in those matters of friendship. If she's neutral to you then there's no personality traits that u need to change so just go in with what you normally do everyday. I know easier said then done right? Well a usual small talk might do the trick.

Bryne · #4 (**permalink**) 10-09-03, 11:18 PM

well, some news:
she said "bye" to me after one schoolday
I've tried to "stare" at her, or smile when she comes in the classroom..but nothing..
I feel so shy and quiet, that's why I sometimes feel depressed..
but should I do anything? or just wait, be myself and be patient?
I love her for God's sake! and yet I'm so damn afraid!

this teenage sucks..

Bryne · #5 (**permalink**) 27-09-03, 01:41 AM

please, anyone?

bretema · #6 (**permalink**) 27-09-03, 03:13 AM

I would agree that patience is the trick--
Also, looking at it from a girl's point of view--what if she's actually as shy as you are and what she sees is that you're serious and say hi to her but that's all? she might be wondering what you're feeling but she might not make a move either--
Like others have said, just be yourself, and also try to approach her and talk to her--regardless of any feelings of love you might have, you want to be her friend, right? so, how would you approach ANY OTHER potential friend?
good luck!
tantrika-

Bryne · #7 (**permalink**) 27-09-03, 01:44 PM

well.. I guess I'll try to make eye contact..and hold it..
but what if she doesn't like me at all?!
god, this is hard, but ok, I can do it, I can do it, go myself...

#8 (**permalink**) 06-10-03, 12:57 PM

If she doesn't like you in that way, then would you content with a friendship? You might love her bro, but chances are good she doesn't love you and if this doesn't work, you have to get on with your life.

But, you have to do something. Go for her and if it doesn't work, well... hey, that's life bro. You have to work her bro. Talk to her more... smile at her more, make more eye contact with her more... that stuff atleast clues her in if she doesn't have a clue already.

Try it.

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#9 (**permalink**) 06-10-03, 01:01 PM

If she doesn't like you in that way, then would you content with a friendship? You might love her bro, but chances are good she doesn't love you and if this doesn't work, you have to get on with your life.

But, you have to do something. Go for her and if it doesn't work, well... hey, that's life bro. You have to work her bro. Talk to her more... smile at her more, make more eye contact with her more... that stuff atleast clues her in if she doesn't have a clue already.

Try it.

LINEBACKER 2

DuckyWucky · #10 (**permalink**) 07-10-03, 05:14 PM

You're saying you love her? You're fifteen!

I'm sure you like her like alot though. No but really, don't wait too long buddy because while you're waiting, she could get scooped up by another guy who probably has similar thoughts to you, but he has a little more courage to act on it. That would really hurt if it got to that. Trust me.

What if you don't want a relationship, but she on the other hand, wishes a guy would ask her out. At least to go to a movie or a date. Something ya know? Do this, when you see her at school say hi and smile. Make sure she sees and hears you. Don't just hope that she looks your way, say something.

Small talk with her during the week. Things like how your teacher's a weirdo, or how the school work sucks, or blah blah. It shouldn't be too hard. Try not to get too nervous. She's a girl, but she's also still a person like anyone else.

Later in the week or next week when you're comfortable, tell her that you two should hang out for the weekend or something. Don't say, "I was wondering...if you're not doing anything this weekend...that maybe you'd want to..." Be assertive and tell her what she SHOULD do. It works better that way.

Be confident and go for it.

seven770 · #11 (**permalink**) 08-10-03, 01:38 AM

Heres a good tip, I was the same as you, a few years back, no girl, was depressed. But in the last year of school, im nearly 16, just be yourself with your mates, and she talks to you, just pretend your with your mates. I've had one girl ask me out today, and two people are looking at me in class and starting, so as someone said above, Pateince is the see. You've got all your life m8

Andyman720 · #12 (**permalink**) 12-10-03, 08:31 AM

Dude...I was in your exact same situation and practically still am. It sucks I know. I liked this girl in 11th grade and did everything you did.

Your days so much better when she says "Bye" to you, or you just end up having a good conversation with her...

But then again your days suck so bad when she doesn't talk to you, or does something to make you feel stupid....

This love thing sux believe me. I wrote the girl im "in love" with a passionate letter about how i felt and she wouldn't take it...im sure you can know what i felt like. That day i slammed some kids head into the wall just cuz i was pissed off at the world.

My advice kid...Tell her how you feel early on, the more you let it build up the harder it is to tell her and the more hurt you'll feel when she rejects you which she probably will. No offense, but shes gonna date a sophomore in college when you 2 are seniors.