How often is too often and vice versa? - Love Forum

Alicias · #1 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 08:34 PM

I am currently in an long distance relationship
Turth be told, i am a person that needs lots of reassurance though very considerate,

while,he's much more of a cool guy and more understated.
SOmetimes i need a little greeting or little sweetie from him and i would call him

BUt i know it's not too healthy to call or text him too much, but on the other hand, he's not txting or calling me that often too.
(he will reply my text tho).....

I am just confused, some may suggest that he may be not that into me, but i dont know y i jus trust him and for wt it's worth, he seems to remember the detail of things i told him...and he is very sweet and such a great listener when he's talking to me

So any advice?

shh! · #2 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 09:30 PM

I suppose you could tell him you wish he would initiate more contact, but he probably won't. Males are often not as communicative as females. Also, it may be true that he isn't as interested as you are, even if he genuinely like you. Males are often more practical than females, and honestly, long distance relationships are not such a great idea. Relationships normally require contact to thrive because people want to be connected, both physically and emotionally. (Out of sight, out of mind.) He may not be investing as much emotion into this as you are.

good luck...

blackiesharley · #3 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shh!

I suppose you could tell him you wish he would initiate more contact, but he probably won't. Males are often not as communicative as females. Also, it may be true that he isn't as interested as you are, even if he genuinely like you. Males are often more practical than females, and honestly, long distance relationships are not such a great idea. Relationships normally require contact to thrive because people want to be connected, both physically and emotionally. (Out of sight, out of mind.) He may not be investing as much emotion into this as you are.

good luck...

Well, that's true but with the advent and popularity of the internet, not to mention the free/cheap long distance phone plans out there, L/D/R are happening more and more often these days. Often times successfully provided one person is willing to relocate.

I have a couple of friends involved in them at the moment and they're very happy. Frustrated? yes, but looking forward to actually meeting their L/D sweeties.

It can happen....

sweetkiss4one · #4 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 10:52 PM

I was in a long distance relationship for almost one year before I moved down here to be with him. We both made sacrifices to be with each other. We both drove to see each other and even broke off plans just to be together. We did the whole calling everyday and texting as much as we could just to chat and let each other know how much we loved the other. (We still do that today and we live together!!!).

Just talk to him about it..... it's better to find out what's going on then to worry about it be nothing!

Junsui · #5 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 10:56 PM

Looking forward to meeting their sweeties? I can understand if you were together and one moved for job/school reasons and the other had to wait awhile before transfering, but I guess I still find it weird to be all serious about a relationship when you haven't even met.

Alicias · #6 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 11:01 PM

i met him already, i dont know, may be i should have faith in the whole thing
i just dont know wt's the best way to work it, u kow?

Junsui · #7 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 11:05 PM

oh I wasn't refering to your situation hehe

Chlorine · #8 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 11:12 PM

Alicias----It's dissapointing when someone isn't in contact as often as you'de like them to be. Perhaps you might like to take a step back. See if he does contact you. If he doesn't, it shows his lack of interest.

Alicias · #9 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 11:19 PM

that's sad....

#10 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 11:20 PM

That's life.

Junsui · #11 (**permalink**) 24-10-05, 11:23 PM

Life sucks sometimes.

mini696 · #12 (**permalink**) 25-10-05, 06:20 AM

I have the same problem with my GF. Although we arent in a LDR, so it sucks more.

Sorry but I have no advise, expect tell him what you want and if he cant give it to you give it up.

Rosebud · #13 (**permalink**) 25-10-05, 07:02 AM

Wow, I think it's hard enough having a long distance relationship but it makes it even harder when you can't talk to each Other. I would tell him you'd like to talk to him more, and maybe keep trying to call him and stuff. If he doesn't start doing ti back then maybe it's just not meant to be. Maybe he's just the type that doesn't do well on the phone and if so then your in trouble here.

Debunkt · #14 (**permalink**) 25-10-05, 07:32 AM

Well, as everybody knows, I'm in an LDR too. I call my gf everyday, email her while I'm work, text whenever, and just generally keep in contact with her as much as possible. In an LDR you are missing time spent with each other that a normal relationship affords, and therefore it must be made up for in other ways. I can't stand even going a day without talking to my gf. To me, it sounds like this guy is taking it kind of half way, but he may not be interested in you enough to talk to you everyday. It happens, and LDR's aren't for everyone. Thats the damn truth. Just be forward, tell him what annoys you, how you feel, etc. The thing about LDR's is that they absolutely, positively, rely 100% on full out, constant, unprovoked honesty. There's also more to it than that, but starting off fresh in one, thats the essential detail.

Rosebud · #15 (**permalink**) 25-10-05, 07:35 AM

LOL I just noticed your comment under your avatar Debunkt, LOL I love it!!!