why does she dress that way? - Love Forum

2ucson · #1 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 04:36 AM

my gf and i have been dating five years and live together.

she likes to go out dancing with friends. i go sometimes, but am not too into the whole club thing. she understands and is cool with that, and i am cool about letting her go without me.

thing is, she often dresses very...revealingly, sexy, whatever you wanna call it...

this bothers me.

who is she dressing up for? herself? other guys? her girlfriends?

maybe i'm overreacting. ladies, got any thoughts on this one?

COAD · #2 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 04:42 AM

You could be over reacting, but also this could be something serious. Any strange behavior lately?

In a good case, she just likes to dress up.

Jeblina · #3 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 04:42 AM

Personally, as a female, I feel good about myself when I know that I look good. I am also not really into the club scene, but when I do go out, some days, I feel like dressing casual but nice, and other days, I feel like dressing sexy. Unless you have some other reason to suspect that she's going behind your back with other guys, I would assume that she is doing it for herself.

It's also probably a good idea to talk with her about how you're feeling...maybe she can give you some insight into it that will allow you to stop worrying so much!

ThisIsSuchAPity · #4 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 04:44 AM

Hmm... well she is probably just dressing up like that because she wants to look good, and if she is with her friends then she wants to look good next to them also. I wouldn't worry about it too much. But if it really bothers you then ask her. Don't make it sound like you think she is cheating on you or something. Then she may get upset if she isn't. Just ask gently and nonchalantly. Hope I helped you out a bit

Jamie

2ucson · #5 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 04:48 AM

thanks for the replies.

i should add that i have talked to her about it, we communicate well, so she knows it makes me uncomfortable. but at the same time, that is who she is, and far be it from me to try to change someone else. we all know that never works.

she is also extremely attractive, so i know she draws the attention of lots of guys. that said, she has never given me any reason not to trust her. still, it makes me uncomfortable and wonder why she feels the need to dress that way....

she once said, long ago, that "men dress up to try to impress women; women dress up to try to impress other women."

what do you think?

COAD · #6 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 04:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2ucson

she once said, long ago, that "men dress up to try to impress women; women dress up to try to impress other women."

what do you think?

WOW! Thats an awesome quote man!

Pilot · #7 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 07:27 AM

I'm in the same position as you actually. My g/f dresses up sexy and hits the clubs every weekend, and consistantly attracts alot of male attention. I find it hard to deal with, so i'll monitor this topic to pick out a few tips on how to deal with this situation.

I hope you're alright and things work out for you and your partner.

ALovelyLady86 · #8 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 07:46 AM

Hmmm I disagree with every post I've seen so far. Maybe I'm prude (thats not a bad thing) but I NEVER dress up to reveal more than I should unless its in front of the man I love. EVER. If I were to, it would of course be because I want to attract some male attention. And with that being said... why would I want to attract male attention? Use your imagination... lol

PS I have been to a few clubs with my older sister.. neither one of us dressed sexy at all (shes married and I'm just prude) and we still had a GREAT time.

Commendable · #9 (**permalink**) 19-05-05, 07:54 AM

I never use to dress sexy until I met my bf. Now I like to dress sexy for myself and him. Since he apparently liked me in jeans and t-shirts, it gave me a lot of confidence. Now I like to dress sexy wether I'm with him or not. It just makes me feel good.

2ucson · #10 (**permalink**) 20-05-05, 02:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

Maybe I'm prude... but I NEVER dress up to reveal more than I should ...

Well, revealing more than you 'should' is a complete matter of opinion. Highly subjective. And seeing as how you are 'prude' (in your words) then you probably dont have the same perspective as the 'average' woman.

It's a question of motive. And if you don't ever dress 'sexy', then you wouldn't really know a woman's motivation for doing so.

artyemi · #11 (**permalink**) 20-05-05, 03:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2ucson

Well, revealing more than you 'should' is a complete matter of opinion. Highly subjective. And seeing as how you are 'prude' (in your words) then you probably dont have the same perspective as the 'average' woman.

It's a question of motive. And if you don't ever dress 'sexy', then you wouldn't really know a woman's motivation for doing so.

hey.. i like you.... we should be friends..

2ucson · #12 (**permalink**) 20-05-05, 05:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by artyemi

hey.. i like you.... we should be friends..

hehe...thanks artyemi. i think.

assuming you weren't being sarcastic, i could use all the friends i can get!

jolovessim · #13 (**permalink**) 20-05-05, 05:47 AM

i wouldnt worry about it, if it really bothers you ask her to calm it down, but i dont think its anything to worry about. when guys get together ( i know this isnt true of all) they boast about how much they can drink, how strong they are, how much they know about cars or bikes or whatever, just generally try and show off. This sounds like its the same kind of thing, every guy wants to be the 'pack leader' well girls want to stand out, want to be the most beautiful, mainly to show off for the other girls and for herself.

Pilot · #14 (**permalink**) 20-05-05, 06:56 AM

Speaking of asking the g/f to calm it down, I did that with mine and she said no.

misombra · #15 (**permalink**) 20-05-05, 07:29 AM

i always joke with my boyfriend that he would like nothing better than for me to wear a nun outfit or a burka! but he doesn't mind as long as i'm not showing too much boobies or bootie he doesn't mind if i'm looking cute to go out. it's a fun girl thing. my girlfriends and i like to get a girlied out and fix each others hair and borrow each others clothes and whatever to go out and have fun with each other. i don't do it for male attention, but if they're looking then that's all they're gonna get. sometimes women just need to get dressed up and hang out. i don't know, it's like a ritual i guess. he won't try to stop me from going out but he will tell if what i'm wearing is trashy, and he doesn't have bad taste so i trust him. i don't know the extent to which your girlfriend is dresses "revealing" and "sexy" so i couldn't tell you, like you said, it's all subjective. maybe because she's very pretty you're worried some other guy is gonna try to get with her but she only wants to be with you. guys at clubs are no comparison to the guy at home.