Asking her out - Love Forum

Fajemeister · #1 (**permalink**) 31-10-05, 08:13 PM

I want to ask this girl out this fri night but I don't want it to look like i'm trying to take her on a date. She's supposed to come over at some point so I could show her some lighting systems for her car. I'm thinking about asking her tonight to come over fri after work, but I also want to go out for a little bit with her, like mabey go to a cafe or something. Can anyone give any advice as to how I should ask her so it won't make the situation look like a date?

Rosebud · #2 (**permalink**) 31-10-05, 09:09 PM

Well I hate to say this but from you said, it kinda sounds like that's what you want to do? But I could be wrong. Well just tell her to come over friday after work and you'll show her whatever you need to. Then when she gets there after all is said and done ask tell her you need some coffee or something to eat or whatever and ask her if she wants to come along.

Fajemeister · #3 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 07:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rosebud

Well I hate to say this but from you said, it kinda sounds like that's what you want to do? But I could be wrong. Well just tell her to come over friday after work and you'll show her whatever you need to. Then when she gets there after all is said and done ask tell her you need some coffee or something to eat or whatever and ask her if she wants to come along.

Ok. I have a question for you Rosebud, lets say you were the type of girl who gets hit on all the time because your really good looking and you go out frequently. How would you want to be asked to go out for something like this. I'm just trying to get as much of the female perspective as possible.

shh! · #4 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 07:36 AM

Why don't you want to date her? And if you DO want to date her, shouldn't she know about it?

::I don't get boys!::

Fajemeister · #5 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shh!

Why don't you want to date her? And if you DO want to date her, shouldn't she know about it?

::I don't get boys!::

I am honestly not sure if I would date this girl.

Well anyway I asked her if she wanted to come over fri night and she said mabey, but i'm taking that as a no.

I have a question, do girls make up a lot of stuff about themselves sexually? Like this girl I like, she'll tell me random stuff about her sex life, but the thing is I really don't believe her because she usually says it really timidly, kinda like she's either making it up as she's talking or she's afraid of the response i'm going to give her. I mean some of the things she tells me, you would automatically believe she's a slut, but I don't really believe most of the stuff she says. I just get that gut feeling thats telling me she's full of bullshit. So do girls do this to guys sometimes? Or has anyone had any experiences like this where the girl makes up a lot of stuff? The thing that throws me is I don't know why she says this stuff. Anyone thats good with reading girls or is a girl please help.

Junsui · #6 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 08:38 PM

She just randomly starts talking about sexual things she has done? Yes, girls lie about that sometimes, just like guys do.

Fajemeister · #7 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Junsui

She just randomly starts talking about sexual things she has done? Yes, girls lie about that sometimes, just like guys do.

I can tell this girl likes talking about sex, but thats not really something I want to talk to her about or hear about when we're at work. I mean, just the way she comes out and says stuff automatically registers in my mind as being complete crap because it's usually out of nowhere. For instance, she'll randomly go "yea i had anal last night, if you tell anyone about that i might have to do something to you" or something along those lines. I mean this girl even lied about having a boyfriend. For example we would be talking and she'll kinda throw a sexual inuendo into the convo and then right after say "oh just like i did with my BF last night" Eventually she admitted she doesn't have a BF. Why do girls do this? Is it to try and make themselves more desireable?

Junsui · #8 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 09:44 PM

I don't know, but she sounds stupid. I would stay away from her.

Tone · #9 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 09:47 PM

Maybe you're just really bad at catching humor/sarcasm, Faje?

shh! · #10 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 10:02 PM

I think young women sometimes are just becoming aware of their sexual power, and like to experiment with how they can use it, thus the inappropriate comments to you.

This is a highly sexualized society that we live in, and young girls are expected to have more sexual knowledge than is healthy (or often even possible). She may be lying because she wants to appear more worldly and experienced than she is, because that is what girls think boys like, a view that is supported by the mass media. Check out who "gets" the boys on MTV - all the slutty girls.

Still, I don't know why you'd be interested in a girl who appears to be a chronic liar. She definitely has issues.

Junsui · #11 (**permalink**) 01-11-05, 10:03 PM

What shh! said.

Fajemeister · #12 (**permalink**) 02-11-05, 04:29 AM

Well the only thing is that I don't know if she's really BSing all that stuff she talks about. I mean, I know she kinda lied about having a BF, but thats really the only lie i've actually heard out of her. I mean I'm sure she says crazy stuff to fool around with me, but just the way she says it sometimes makes me think. She just confuses me.

CircleC · #13 (**permalink**) 02-11-05, 06:51 AM

She knows you're a guy. She thinks you are a sex fiend. She wants you to know that she is available to you. If you want her longterm, take it slow and deal with her being flirty with lots of other guys. If you just want some fun in the shortterm, this is your girl man. I think you've missed her message: "If you want me, come get me."

Rosebud · #14 (**permalink**) 02-11-05, 07:06 AM

Well, yeah it could be just to see your reaction to what she says. I think she likes you, and she's trying to flirt with you a little but doesn't know exactly how to get your attention. So she may be throwing things out there to see what you like and what you don't like. I can't say this a good thing but that's just what it seems to me. And to be honest i don't think I would believe all of it.

Fajemeister · #15 (**permalink**) 02-11-05, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CircleC

She knows you're a guy. She thinks you are a sex fiend. She wants you to know that she is available to you. If you want her longterm, take it slow and deal with her being flirty with lots of other guys. If you just want some fun in the shortterm, this is your girl man. I think you've missed her message: "If you want me, come get me."

You think so? I never really thought about it like that. See the thing is, I don't know how to respond to stuff like that. I am so bad when it comes to comming up with quick responses like that and i'm pretty bad at flirting. Any help with my little problems?