asked her out -she making a joke out of me -did i screw up - Love Forum

joe45 · #1 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 06:17 AM

have any of u guys ever asked a girl out and she said" No maybe next time", so its like 3 days later and she tells other classmates-not her freinds and her freinds and tell other freinds and ppl about how Joey asked jen out , , not just that we all now girls gossip -but your getting these smiles and smirks from girls,-you never gotten these smiles andd smirks before u asked her out. this for just askin a girl out right after class. this is in the college level too-19-23 yr olds so no ,not HS .

any of u guys experienced someting like this -what did u do about it and why do u think she had to make such a big deal of a guy asking her out. i'm not ugly-above avg or avg looking so is she. not sure just need opinions and suggestions-i'm not the most experience guy when it comes to girls and dating -actually i am a rookie. Before askin Jen out i noticed her alwasy giving me glances and looks -never spoke to her then i did a couple of times and asked her out,-i thought she was interested the looks and when i talked to her she seemed receptive, but a quiet girl. 1 month later i asked her out, after asking her out she made a mock out of me. why do u think she even did this to me- i didn;t bother askin her out again as her body language just didn;t show that she was intereested and also of what she did -make a mock and joke of me-just for askin her out. you think a girl would be flattered and happy- guess not her.

i was thinkin of askin her out one more time ,but said ah NO , she didn;t seem receptive and body language was not there. i should have confronted her about the situation , but was so heart broken about it that i didn;t even bother. i was really waiting for her to come to me since i initiated like 7 of the conversation and not one did she initiate. not sure if she was interested and shy or not interested and just being polite-so she just spoke to me.

i hope this situation won;t happen again - i will be askin out more girls out, i have asked 5 girls out during my time in college-2 yrs all have said NO. getting girls for me is not an easy task. i turn 25 in december , i ain;t young too

Junsui · #2 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 06:27 AM

How small is your college?

shh! · #3 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 06:32 AM

Maybe you can consult with a friend you can trust to be honest about what sort of impression you are making in the world, in case you can make some simple modifications. Five girls isn't so many, but it sounds like your confidence is waning.

BTW - if she ran around blabbing to all her friends and was so callous about your feelings, then it was probably good things didn't work out.

Late_vamp · #4 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 06:52 AM

she's just an immature little Bit ch , just act as if she isnt shit , dont even notice her , dont pay attention if she talks to you , soon she'll start to wonder why she isnt important anymore and then all you have to do is give her the cold shoulder .

thats a real BURN for her ... just DO NOT PAY ATTENTION TO HER or her friends , and especially DONT ASK HER OUT AGAIN , youll only make yourself look like a fool for trying again , once is enough , look shes making fun of you , you think if you try again she wont make MORE fun of you . act as if shes a little shit . she'll be like ..."WTF ?!?! why ?! what the ?! howcome he isnt crazy about me anymore ? have i gained weight ???"

joe45 · #5 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 08:13 AM

i never confronted her about it-just was so heart broken -really thought she liked me and i would get a YEs. maybe it was b/c i had a really sad face when she said NO.
i not paying any attention to her anymore-i'm talkin to other girls-the thing is i think hte other girls now about it too-it totally spread-

i am at a small college -yes that why it really sucks. i never called her names or nothing-just ignored her.
anyways i dont really care about her i just don;t want it to happen again -i just need to now what i did wrong and move on to the next girl.

the thing is i'm asian right so is she, after that i asked a white girl out-she said sorry ur not my type she was direct and striaghforward ,something i like -after that she was still freindly and all and didn;t tell everyone about the fact i asked her out-unlike the asian girl. who nows i now some asian girls who don;t even like aisan guys-maybe shes one of em-u now one of those white washed asians. oh well

Quote:

Originally Posted by Late_vamp

she's just an immature little Bit ch , just act as if she isnt shit , dont even notice her , dont pay attention if she talks to you , soon she'll start to wonder why she isnt important anymore and then all you have to do is give her the cold shoulder .

thats a real BURN for her ... just DO NOT PAY ATTENTION TO HER or her friends , and especially DONT ASK HER OUT AGAIN , youll only make yourself look like a fool for trying again , once is enough , look shes making fun of you , you think if you try again she wont make MORE fun of you . act as if shes a little shit . she'll be like ..."WTF ?!?! why ?! what the ?! howcome he isnt crazy about me anymore ? have i gained weight ???"

#6 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 08:23 AM

who gives a ****in ****. go hit on some women that dont go to your college and tell the bitches to act their age!

gHEXjt · #7 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 08:26 AM

She did that because she's an immature idiot. I actually had the same exact thing happen to me this semester, though. I met a girl at a random thing in school, and ended up talking to her for about an hour. We got along really well, were from the same area of the country, had common interests, and she was drop dead gorgeous. I've got no problem saying she was someone I'd typically consider out of my league, but I've gotten good-looking girls in the past, not bombshells or anything, but cute chicks, and figured I'd try my luck with her since we got along so well. She said no, that she had a bf, but seemed absolutely flattered. I've since seen her at the bars on numerous occasions, always trashed and hanging on the biggest dickheads I've met on campus. So I didn't feel too bad about being rejected by her, I'm into nice girls anyway. Also, I assume she was lying about the bf, and I hope she was, cause he'd be pretty pissed if he saw the shit I've seen her doing.

Needless to say, I saw her in a class of mine (350 people) that I didn't know she was in. Sitting in a group of friends, who I happened to know most of, just by coincidence, and they sat there pointing at me for 5 minutes with ridiculous smiles on their faces. And at that point all hell broke loose, because my buddies caught a glance at them pointing at me, and all started laughing and screaming my name, just to draw more attention to me and piss me off. I was pretty pissed, but looking back, it was really no big deal and its not like those girls are still pointing up at me in class and if they do, who gives a shit. You can't worry about something like that. And asking out 2.5 girls per year is nothing. Ask out some more, starting hitting the bars, you're 25.

#8 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 09:53 AM

correction ghexit, he'd be pretty pissed if he saw you asking her out too..lol

jesus christ..im going to start referring to people as animals..

gHEXjt · #9 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 10:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lilwing89

correction ghexit, he'd be pretty pissed if he saw you asking her out too..lol

jesus christ..im going to start referring to people as animals..

I asked her out nicely at school. I didn't know she had a bf, or if she ever really did? I suggested he'd be pissed about the way she was acting at the bar, i.e. completely bombed and groping random dudes.

Rosebud · #10 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 10:09 AM

Yea, this girl seems real immature and a waste of your time. Don't get too down about this because she's obviously not dating material in the first place. Ignore her and the other's comments and just go about your way.

Seattle-JP · #11 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 01:49 PM

hey man 5 girls in 2 years...if you are looking for a girlfriend that don't come along that easily...You've got to ask out more chicks...YOU MISS 100% OF THE SHOTS YOU DON'T TAKE...*write that down*

Bluevetteracer · #12 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 02:29 PM

I use to feel this way also, but remember, her making a bid deal about this is about HER not you. She wants everyone to know that a guy asked her out. She may not be interested in you, but her low self esteem needs to exploit it.

Out of all the girls she told this to, I bet half of them wish you asked them.
That is not fluff, it is most likely the truth.

Don't take it personally, and don't let any of them see that it bothers you, if you do, it will look like sour grapes, and you will be labeled the village idiot.

Just ask another girl out a few weeks from now. A girl like this is not the type you want to date anyway.

If all else fails, and your name is mud, you can always tell everyone she gave you crabs.

That was a joke, don't write that down.

Only-virgins · #13 (**permalink**) 15-11-05, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by joe45

any of u guys experienced someting like this -

Nope.

_______________

chadro · #14 (**permalink**) 15-12-05, 04:09 AM

sounds like these older college girls are just as immature

Hugo Pickle · #15 (**permalink**) 15-12-05, 04:44 AM

Hey man it could be worse, trust me.

What I think you did wrong.
You were too serious when your asking her out.
You asked her in front of the whole class, right after class.
You asked her on a date before trying to get to know her (key part)

A buddy (who is here now) recommends that you ask her to the lunch first at the commons area and just talk to her and not ask her for her number the first time. He says you skipped about 8 steps in the dating game.

I agree with him, you went from she looks at me, to I asked her out. Damn man it was all but destined to fail. Sorry to tell you that but the good news is that you can recover and fix this. Remember as we (my friend and I) see it, you skipped steps more than screwed up steps. The end result is the same but the fix is much easier. You might have screwed up the few steps you took also but lets not focus on that now.

I recommend that you go out to the clubs and bars and learn to have a good time there. Learn to dance. I recommend jazz dancing lessons. I think jazz dancing is taught everywhere and helps you to have confidence and a lot of moves can be used on modern dance clubs.

I also recommend having a regular physical activity that you do once or twice a week with other people. I used to do volleyball (will pick it up again this summer.)

In college when you go out you will see people from classes everywhere. College has two sides. The side that everyone sees in class, and the side people see at night. What you want to have everyone at college know that after class (at night or in the afternoon) you’re a happening guy. Don’t neglect class though, a little goes a long way. You don’t have to be seen all the time just a few times and make those times count (dance, have a good time, talk to chicks)