ex is marrying another. - Love Forum

misombra · #1 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 07:17 AM

http://www.loveforum.net/t8176-ex-is-with-another.html

hi guys. so yeah, my ex just got engaged.

ugh.

vashti · #2 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 07:36 AM

Whoa - that was kind of quick, wasn't it?

::sigh:: sorry misombra. You must be rather unhappy.

misombra · #3 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 07:45 AM

it's not too bad if i don't think about it. i'm just glad i learned from the experience, you know. that's really all there is to hold onto.

Rosebud · #4 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 07:48 AM

Sombra I don't know the whole story behind your ex and what happened between the 2 of you, but you guys are apart for a reason. Just think, he's probably the same jerk he always was but she may not find out until after she's married him. At least you found out prior to that!

clynn · #5 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 07:57 AM

Yuck. That still really stings though, eh?

Funny - you almost wished you just hadn't heard the news at all, then you could just carry on along as you have been. Many years from now it maybe wouldn't have the same impact.

Mishanya · #6 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 08:18 AM

Okay, I have something that might make you feel better misombra

There are two types of ex's:

1. The ones who hurt me for whom I don't want any happiness
2. The ones whom I have hurt and for whom I want all the happiness there is

My rationalization. For #1's I would be upset if they were getting married but the truth is such that if:

1. They have changed from how they were, then they deeply regret what they have done to you, and if opportunity presented itself they may even ask for you forgiveness because if they changed then they have realized their mistakes and they are sorry for them. Thus, if they did change and are worthy of forgiveness then it is okay to be happy for them
2. If they have not changed and are still the same jerks they were at the split then chances are the marriage won't last and you can rejoice at their forthcoming downfall (So another reason to be happy)

Now cheer up sweet cake

misombra · #7 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 08:35 AM

thanks guys.

mish, i don't wish good or bad for him. i just wish he'd drop of the face of the earth.

Lloyd95 · #8 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 08:37 AM

...at least you don't wish bad for him....

clynn · #9 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 08:38 AM

ha ha ha aha ha ha

I know that feeling, misombra!

Mishanya · #10 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by misombra

thanks guys.

mish, i don't wish good or bad for him. i just wish he'd drop of the face of the earth.

That feeling can be harmful to the self. So best way is to rejoice in the thought that he will stuff up everything that he touches eventually

Tone · #11 (**permalink**) 22-12-05, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lloyd95

...at least you don't wish bad for him....

hahahaha - Lloyd we should start our own sitcom.

Boss lady - *big hug for you*

Come on, you got Mikey - don't think of this other jerkoff. Wanna go play some poker? Ya? Maybe take some e-money from some internet nerds? Ya? Maybe, listen in on a little e-handjobs goin on in the main lobby? Ya?

artyemi · #12 (**permalink**) 23-12-05, 12:06 AM

that sux. but you got us. and isn't that all that matters?

nomas · #13 (**permalink**) 23-12-05, 03:56 AM

sombra..how did I miss that previous post?..oh, wait.. that was the weekend I was in boston, kinda.. on july 4th.

in any case, I think the majority of us are not immune to the old "where a fire burns, the ashes remain", and while we have limited control over feelings, we have all the control over our actions and how we spend our time. The more you keep busy with other things, the less time you have over fussing over negative feelings and the such. Now I know we don't all have my unique capabilty of becoming a robot, but we control it at different levels. I'm not saying eliminate all of life's emotional ups and downs, but give less importance to the downs.. Take it in stride and hakunna mattata..or however it's spelled...

misombra · #14 (**permalink**) 23-12-05, 10:36 AM

thanks guys.

nomas-you're absolutely right. like i said before, when i'm doing other things i'm not thinking about it. and luckily it's not on my mind day and night. and talking to you guys and getting reassurance, as well as having mikey, does help. the crazy thing is that his sister said that they had tried coming to my house when he was in town but didn't see my car. (thank god.) i just keep thinking to myself, why? i mean, he proposed to her while he was in town. she said he wanted to say hi before he left. i am SO glad i wasn't home. (yet another sick, twisted part of me wanted to see him.) his leaving to the military was my saving grace from him. i thought i'd never have to see or hear about him ever again.

ugh, how wrong was i?

now where's tone, let's go play some poker. let's not talk to nomas because he always ditches me at bones.

you see that nomas, i have a new game buddy so there.

nomas · #15 (**permalink**) 23-12-05, 11:19 AM

damnit...you're my EX game buddy, eh? And you never asked ME to play poker with you. Why couldn't it be me...WHY??

It's all a circle..all of it..parallels everywhere...