How would you feel? - Love Forum

Jay-Tea · #1 (**permalink**) 28-10-03, 05:26 PM

Here's the scene: You're completely uncomfortable about your boyfriend still communicating with his ex because (based on female instinct) you feel that some sort of a special attachment still exists. After all, they were together for 4 yrs. and you've only been together for a few months. He said he understood your feelings and promised that he'll stop doing it. But that was until you discovered they still kept in touch. You tried to ask him but he kept denying.

How would you feel?

jane · #2 (**permalink**) 29-10-03, 08:12 AM

I would be pissed that he would do that behind my back and not be honest. I would be ok if he was still talkingto her but if nothing is going on, why lie? That doesn't make any sense. I'd talk to him

BuzzLiteBeer · #3 (**permalink**) 29-10-03, 10:19 AM

I think it's not just females. I will admit that i'm a rather jealous person and if my gf was seeing her ex even as "friends" I would be deeply hurt.
Hell, I get jealous when I see my crush talking to another guy...

Jay-Tea · #4 (**permalink**) 29-10-03, 12:57 PM

Yup, that's what keeps me wondering...why lie if there's nothing to hide?
And yeah, no matter how "past" is past, the idea of the other person still keeping in touch with his/her ex does make us green-eyed

Illusional · #5 (**permalink**) 29-10-03, 04:10 PM

**** yeah i would be pissed....in fact this would still bother me. my last relationship ended because i couldn't trust her. no matter how much she said there were just friends it still didn't click in my head. however i decided that i was going to put it all behind me and trust her..but was i wrong. when he started to date other people she exploded...and to make it better, this converstation was right infront on my friends, right infront of me, right in my own house. her ex was dating my friend's ex and when she found out, she just had to call him that second. now i was sort of in the same situation as you are in, they were together for a long time and i feel as though she just got out of the relationship yet she never bothered to tell me when. if you have doubts about your ex, i feel that you shouldn't let them go unheard about. true, a lot of people will be against you, in that you don't want him and her seeing eachother, BUT that's all his friends. they don't see it from your eyes and it's hard to trust him. i wouldn't make him choose between you and her, but let him realize that it hurts you and it's hard to trust him, especially after he jut got caught. raverboy

peshkunta · #6 (**permalink**) 29-10-03, 09:46 PM

I would question it, but I wouldn't be pissed. If the girl I'm with wants to be with someone else, then, be my guest - it's no loss.

Just be clear with him. I think honesty is the cornerstone of a relationship - if you don't have that, it's not worth bothering.

Velcrez · #7 (**permalink**) 31-10-03, 09:27 AM

I would be jealous to. Talking with him sounds like the best advice to me. At least it will give you a chance to sort things out. Just hope that his responce isn't another lie.

#8 (**permalink**) 31-10-03, 10:18 AM

Well, I've always said people make their own choices. You can't stop your ex from talking to her. I mean, if they're friends, they're friends. If they are more, then there's nothing you can do about.

It's not worth fighting or stressing over.

LINEBACKER 2

Illusional · #9 (**permalink**) 01-11-03, 03:34 AM

true... in response to peshkunta's post.. i would expect my gf to be honest with me, if she wants to leave me then let that bitch leave. if not then be honest and tell me you want to be with me. i feel there is a sense of mistrust when you can even talk to your partner about things like this. raverboy

jane · #10 (**permalink**) 01-11-03, 07:04 AM

Amen Illusional!

Jay-Tea · #11 (**permalink**) 01-11-03, 12:37 PM

Sad but true: some people just can't seem to make up their minds