Cake and women - Love Forum

Matt15Vick · #1 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 12:13 PM

Ok, I was wondering if you can just give me some feedback on this CRAZY (and probably comical) thing I did...

So I told you all, some months ago that I liked this girl and I got nervous around her and didn't have any courage to talk to her. Well I kept not talking to her and not talking, and my friend decided to send her an email to her saying I had a crush on her. Nothing really happened a little while until i found her profile on myspace and her screenname. It took a couple days for us to be online at the same time but I messaged her and introduced myself. We made small talk and she told me her birthday was in a week on sunday. Still not having balls, over the next week the most I could do was make small eye contact w/ her. Then my crazy brain kicked in.

I had this idea that if her birthday is coming up why not get her something. I didn't want to get her a present cause I didn't truly know her. But we shared the same lunch time, so I thought why not get her a cake and then we could talk while eating it. (oh how brilliant) I discussed this idea w/ 2 of my friends, both saying it was a good idea and a sweet thing to do. So I bought a small little chocolate cake that I thougt would suffice our hunger needs. The next day I carried the cake around in a bag, getting wierd looks as I told people a cake was in the bag. Finally lunch came, and I waited a few minutes and then went for it. I sat down across from her and her friend (who i know somewhat) and commenced my conversation.
Me: Hi
Them: (just stare)
Me: So.. I was thinking it was your birthday yesterday right?
Lizzy(girl i liked): *nods*
Me: well i was thinking, why don't we celebrate it with some cake?
I pulled out the cake and begin opening the package.
Them: *shock* hands over mouths, then laughter
I open them and pull out forks and everything, they don't really make movements toward the forks or cake. I therefore then take a bite to show its harmlessness.
Still shocked, I say it is good and offer it to them again. Her friend says no that's alright and I seeing the awkardness of the situation tell them then I'll have to split it with my friends at my table. Still laughing a little, I leave them to discuss the wierd person that just visited them. By the way me and my friends devoured the rest of the cake.
That afternoon I send her a myspace message, asking her comically why she didn't want any cake. I never recieved a response. I should have tried to slowly build the relationship by saying Hi but I just didn't have the courage (and maybe was too embarassed). I instant messaged her a couple times but the conversations were always her leaving then. I emailed her w/ no response. Blind to the reality of her no responses, i didn't realize that she probably didn't like me. Eventually around christmas I was talking to one of my friends about her. He told me then that she told him a couple of days ago that I need to leave her alone. The rejection stung like a hornet but the release from the constant worrying about talking to her was gone cause now i knew she didn't want me to. It was bitter/sweet. I had wanted to stand out to her but maybe next time I should take a more normal route? Any suggestions? oh and yes your aloud to tell me i'm psycho

NeoSeminole · #2 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 12:20 PM

cake makes women fat. Bad idea!

funsounds · #3 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 12:37 PM

lets try to be a bit more conventional. risky plays like that are long on odds of success...

rayfin · #4 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 01:23 PM

I agree with funsounds, This girl seems like someone who you haven't even had a nice conversation with. (in person, not on the web) The random offering of cake most likely turned her off than made her think it was sweet of you.

edit:
yes, you should take a more normal route next time, methinks. I reread the situation, and It looks kind of stalkerish, in the "online" sense. There's the thing about IMs and such; they give you time to think it out before sending, you read the thing you're about to say to see If it's all right to send. As a result, your thinking's different compared to real life and online, and the girl cant really like you, she's only theoretically liking/being friends with the online self.

So, thats really bad if you want to get any further with her. You said yourself that the only relations you had with her was through online, and you couldnt muster the balls to talk to her in real life.

You really want something to happen, Just DO it. Whether it's asking her out or having a nice convo with her, It'll be much more harder for her to "ignore" or "block" you. If you dont, then you'll live with the regret of not being able to. It's really all your choice

Late_vamp · #5 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 08:01 PM

see , this proves that women rarely appreciate anything , ungrateful spoiled shits some of them are .

funsounds · #6 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Late_vamp

see , this proves that women rarely appreciate anything , ungrateful spoiled shits some of them are .

naw...that's on him. you don't make a play like that. too strong, too direct, too soon. if some chick i didn't know well did that to me, i'd feel a little odd. that's not the girl i'd wanna be with. i don't like it when girls get TOO infatuated with me too quickly.

Chlorine · #7 (**permalink**) 08-01-06, 10:46 PM

Matt15Vick----"But we shared the same lunch time, so I thought why not get her a cake and then we could talk while eating it. (oh how brilliant)....I had wanted to stand out to her but maybe next time I should take a more normal route? oh and yes your aloud to tell me i'm psycho"

Nahhh, you're not a psycho. Plonking yourself down in front of her with a cake and all probably gave her a bit of a shock. But it was a nice gesture on your part. Too bad she didn't appreciate it.

Late_vamp · #8 (**permalink**) 09-01-06, 08:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by funsounds

naw...that's on him. you don't make a play like that. too strong, too direct, too soon. if some chick i didn't know well did that to me, i'd feel a little odd. that's not the girl i'd wanna be with. i don't like it when girls get TOO infatuated with me too quickly.

yea , thats true , if someone came up to me like that i would probably think "hmm , how long do i have until some small bomb blow's this cake all over my face?? "

#9 (**permalink**) 09-01-06, 09:29 AM

how old are you and how good of friends are you with the girl? a cake was prolly a little too much to get her..

chelsee · #10 (**permalink**) 09-01-06, 10:07 AM

i have to agree. it was a nice thing but if she didn't know you well it would be a little embarrassing.

Matt15Vick · #11 (**permalink**) 09-01-06, 10:55 AM

I'm about to turn 17 all, and it really was too much for not knowing her that well. It is though a very funny story to tell friends though. The very valuable lesson to learn here: is don't buy german chocolate mint cake for people you don't know very well.

chelsee · #12 (**permalink**) 09-01-06, 11:04 AM

don't feel bad about it. you did something nice for her.

vashti · #13 (**permalink**) 09-01-06, 11:34 AM

I think you sound very sweet, and I love chocolate cake! I just think you ought to restrict these very nice gestures to people who know you already.

Also, I want to suggest you restrict the number of times you attempt to contact a girl (with no response) to not more than twice. Girls will ignore your calls if they are not interested, and if they ARE interested, trust me: they'll call you back.

By the way - boys get fat from too much cake, too.
:-)

#14 (**permalink**) 10-01-06, 08:07 AM

how much cake is too much?

Dunno · #15 (**permalink**) 10-01-06, 10:19 AM

german chocolate mint cake?......
my bd is in March.....
what school do you go to....
I'll transfer!

Yeah, too much too soon, but very sweet idea. Maybe next time a single Hostess cupcake or one twinkie with a candle in it. That would get my attention, friendly yet not obtrusive. (You were just trying to be friends, I would have eaten the cake)