Confused...indecisive....sitting on a fence

[funkybuddha]

So I've been talking to this girl the last month. We'd talk everyday on the phone or she'd text message me or we'd chat over msn. We've hung out several times during the last month. She's pretty comfortable around me. Body language says so. So 2 nights ago..I kissed her. She returned the kiss. Twice. She calls me the day after...tells me she'd like to be "friends first" before taking this further. Wants to get to know me more. Another factor is she's moving 1.5 hours away to a different city in May for school. And she's told me she doesn't believe in long distance relationships (I've never had one). I don't know how to feel about this. I feel like I might be wasting my time but at the same time I feel like I might miss out on something good if I don't stick around. She told me she likes me and she obviously knows that I like her.

I'd like some feedback on what some of the members here would do...

thanks all

[funkybuddha]

Oh..with the phone calls etc...she'd call me after work, during her break, she'd text me out of the blue...etc..... I'd call her on my break from work since I dont' really like texting or msn'ing. She'd also sit really close to me, almost snuggling up to me when we are sitting beside each other. This is weirding me out..LOL..ugh

[meh]

Well I'd ask her where she sees things going then if she wants to be friends first and then she is moving away and doesn't believe in long distance relationships. Quite honestly, I don't see any way it could work with all you said she told you. So just ask her up front if she thinks there is any chance for this to work and how. But if you can't/won't do that, my bet would be that it would pretty much be a waste of your time.

[Mneumonik]

It might feel right to start something up now, but if she's moving 1.5 hours down the road and she already see's trouble ahead i would pass up the opportunity. Stay friends, its gonna cause for a lot more heartbreak down the road.

Most girls going to college with a boyfriend back home usually doesnt work, she's gonna want to go out and party, and you'll be sitting home wondering what she's doing, there are a huge amount of other guys in college, and it IS college.. thats when most of the experimenting happens.

[Debunkt]

while I wouldn't consider 1.5 hours down the road a "long distance relationship", more like a inconvenienced relationship, it still probably isn't worth it. You can't go into a relationship with one person already have a low expectation of its outcome.

[Pears]

Ask her how she really feels. Right now she seems confused. She is showing signs that she wants to be with you by being so close, but she is also saying that she's worried about leaving to college. Like Debunkt said, I also don't feel that 1.5 hours away is long distance, but it may be more difficult to see her and know what she's up to. How do you feel? If you really like her and think that she is worth starting a relationship with, then you have to understand that there are some difficulties you'll have to deal with. If you can accept those difficulties, then you can try getting into the relationships. It is hard to decide because you also don't want yourself to get hurt later on or waste your time. Think about whether she is worth being in a relationship with, knowing that she will be going away.

[funkybuddha]

An up to date thing.....

Well we've pretty much been seeing each other a few times every week. She is showing definite signs. We've decided to take this nice and slow and see where it goes. We'll make a decision later on when it comes time for her to move whether she can continue or not. I mean we both have cars, and her school schedule isn't that hectic at all. 1.5 hour drive a week isn't that bad...but we will have to see.

Thanks all...keep you guys updated...

[Lloyd95]

My commute to work is 1/5 hours one way; it's not "long".

I heard that she gave you two reasons why she doesn't want a relationship with you, and rather just be friends.