My Ex, the love of my life

[pisces]

Hey guys,

this is my first time posting on here.


Basically I'm 22 and have had one serious girlfriend. She was my high school sweetheart and we went out for 18 months from finishing school to university. We broke at the beginning of ours second at uni, and she got with one of her best friends at the time.

2 years on, she is still with her boyfriend. We still get togehter for drinks, however we get on so well its all a little wierd. She knows this too, and we have both talked about the fact that we really broke up because of circumstance and not because we stopped loving each other.

Since I have broken up with her I've dated quite a few girls however, I've not found a girl who even comes close to how I felt about my ex.

I am happy to keep seeing her as a friend, however I am wondering now if perhaps I should fight for my corner and really tell her that I think we could make it work. She is quite skeptical about getting back together and thinks it might be 'dangerous'. But we still get on great, and I'm still so attracted to her, and she is to me.

I don't want to mess things up for her with her current boyfriend. He is in the army, so there is perhaps an obvious strain between them already, where as both me and her are now in London at the start of our careers.

Do you think I should just move on as before? or should I really try and get things together with her.

personally I feel that I will unlikely find anyone who comes close as to how I feel about her. maybe I haven't found the right person yet, BUT maybe I won't....

What shall i do?

Thanks,

Will

[Converse]

Move on, from what you've said it sounds like she wants to stay with her new boyfriend.

[Ellynn]

If she wanted to be with you....she would have dumped him ages ago. To me it sounds like she sees you as a friend. Either accept this......or stop hanging out with her.

[NeoSeminole]

I kind of know how you feel. I've only dated one girl. I loved her with all my heart. We broke up 2 yrs ago b/c we both needed to grow as individuals. Now, I'm beginning to think I will never find a better girl. The thought of maybe giving it another try has crossed my mind. I ask myself if the reason I want to date her again is b/c I want what's best for me or b/c I am still in love with her. Therein lies your answer.

[Pears]

If she is even a little bit skeptical about getting back together with you, then it's not a good idea to pursue her. It is also not a good idea to pursue anyone who is not single. Things get complicated for the worse when that happens.

[Rosebud]

Well see this is a difficult situation. Normally I always tell people to back off when the person they are interested in is dating someone else. I still believe that, btu it's alos hard when you broke up on good terms and still talk to one another all the time and have the same feelings for each other. But if she has been with this guy for that long there is something between them no matter what you two had. I would say if she ever asks you how you feel about her.....be honest, but I wouldn't offer the info up to her unless asked becasue you don't want to get into the middle of the relationship she has now!

[clynn]

Well, I can't imagine any relationship is just plain old smooth sailing and easy, though some probably are more than others.

With that in mind, it is not unnatural for a person to still harbour at least some feelings for an ex...it doesn't mean that she doesn't feel deeply and fully for her current boyfriend.

Imagine if you had a girlfriend you cared about....how would it make you feel if her ex proclaimed his love for her...this would probably at least cause her some confusion and upset things in the relationship...at least a bit....

Perhaps your time will come with her if things don't work out with her current guy but I wouldn't recommend getting in between them.

[Off2College]

hmm high school relationships, sucks, i know how it feels.