i am cofussed

[lilmis]

hi there im new to this but could really do with a bit of help my problem is as follows.......



i have been seeing this guy for almost 2 months (who i met off a dating site .....i no it sad but didnt have any intentions wen i joined).. everythig was great in the beginnin an there wasnt a day that we didnt talk 2 each other.... but over the last wk or so it feels like hes avoiding me... he hasnt talked to me much over the last wk an every time we arrange 2 see each other he cancels at the last minuate.... an it really confussing me now an i dunno what 2 think.............

so do you think he dont wanna know anymore???? an if he dont then why dont he just tell me or do you think i am beeing paranoid ????

any help will be great thanx

[meguin]

You could always just ask him what's going on. A direct approach is the quickest, if sometimes the hardest, way to figure out if there is something going on.

[lilmis]

i have tried that but he just keeps sayin everything if fine..... i just think he tryin 2 say that he aint intrested any more .. just wish that he would b honest with me even tho all the guys i know aint vry good at beein honest

is it really that hard 2 tell some 1 the truth?

[daisy]

Yes, that's really hard. I think you need just to ask him not "what's going on?" but "if you're not interested at me just say it to me honestly" smth like that.

[xd3vilx]

Approach method always work the best...if he decided to break...well sometime you don't have to drop tear for jerk like them...continue ur life and sure one day you will find ur dream one...

[COAD]

Answer 1:

Hey come on.. Give the guy some space and a break.
Hes propably still freaked out that hes dating some girl he met online.
Sometimes it takes us guys a while to get used to changes.

Answer 2:

The way a person interacts online and in person is actually a very big difference. And it could be that your not the same person that he thought you were. But if hes not a "ass" he will tell you.

Hope things go well for you.

[lilmis]

thanx 4 all ur help really made some sort of sense ..

i think that the next time i see him im gonna try an find out what goin on with him.
it mite b somethin that i dont wanna hear.... but i would rather know now b 4 i really fallin 4 him
an hopefully he will b honest...

[simplyme]

Well my take on the situation is that if you keep asking him if there is a problem.. there will be... If he says everything is fine then everything is fine....at least give him the benefit of the doubt that he is telling you the truth....

He may have something else going on in his life that is distracting him....

Give him a week or so...if you don't see a change ...then start doing other things to take up your time...Also I would tell him that if he needs some time then to call you when he is ready to tell you what is going on.....this will give him some space to think...and then maybe you will get an answer....

[lilmis]

ill try that hopefully ur right but really do think somethin aint right

[Smallspirit]

Sounds like a similar problem to what I'm having. The girl I started seeing not so long ago stopped communicating with me as much as she was, almost didn't seem as enthusiastic if you know what I mean. Mind you I became a bit timid and shy after *that* first kiss situation. So the guy you're seeing could just be frightened of saying something stupid or upsetting like me. Think that happens to a lot of people when it's clear that they are actually 'seeing each other'. I'd give him a bit of space, but still keep in fairly regular contact, drop hints that you still like him etc etc, because you don't want him to think that YOUR avoiding or ignoring him do you?! Well, that's my opinion. Don't happen to know what's goin on if a girl like yourself stops being as communicative towards the guy they are seeing do you?

[lilmis]

i dont think that he is frightened or anythin like that.. i have also told im that i like him but really dont think there somethin right just wish he would tell me it would make it a whole lot simpler than avoidin contact with me altogether
but fom a a girls poin of view ( well mine any way ) i think that girls do it because they really aint interested an that the only way the can call it off without doin it face 2 face sort of hopin they would get the message but i could also b wrong