Pregnacy + tolate... - Love Forum

flurint · #1 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 04:00 PM

Hey every one I'm 16 and i had intercourse with my girl friend about 6 week ago. We broke up about 1 week and we both agree to be good friends and out of the blue she calls me back and tell me that she pregnant. We had intercourse with out condom, i think like 5 week aog she told me that she pregant and i kind of freaked out not that i'm scared but we both 16 and i think thier so much ahead for her and me even tho i wanted to be with her so bad but now i don't want to not because she is pregnant is that i have no more feelings for her.

Now she tells me she going for an abortion next week i said can i be thier with her she if she cry's or sad i will be thier. But she tells me only be thier if I Love Her. I can tell this will scar her for life.

I feel like my life is so crap not because of she pregnant but this feeling is so wierd i feel so bad. What can i do now? I feel so down. I think i'm going to be depress or some thing but i know to her she going to go through much more than i will. Some one give advice.

joe1234 · #2 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 05:12 PM

Wear a Condom or pull out next time. With the abortion bit, I dont support it but its her choice. Be there for her, If you no longer have feelings for her, well dont leave her now is all i can say. If you leave her now it will be real hard on her.
During this phase look for portentous signs of depression. Remember that because you impregnated her she is your responsibility to look after. Ive heard of things like this causing in suicide, I know because its happened around my old neighborhood.

Tiay · #3 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 07:29 PM

wow, sex without a condom is not smart. I also agree with joe, try to be there for her.
As for depression, everybody gets down or feels 'depressed' now and then, but if it the depressed feeling persists you should tell somebody close to you, like family, or go to your school councillor if you have one. What's really important is that you tell somebody who cares.

Joe; it's nice to hear that even though you're against abortion you still think it is a choice that should be left up to her.

flurint · #4 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 10:18 PM

Hey thanks guys, i m back with her i have gave her one chance and she is going to get an abortion but i feel it a pitty if only i was in my 20's than i would be very happy but for the mean time i don't want to ruin her life....the reason why i got back to her is because i felt some thing even if it little i still give it a shot if i don't feel any thing later i gues it fate should be apart.

Am i a bad person since she is christrian and you about how they don't believe in those kind of stuff? i gues i made a big mistake and that to take her vignity.

joe1234 · #5 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 11:01 PM

YOure not a bad person for takin her virginity, but you woulda been a bad person if you left her. you made a good choice

vashti · #6 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by joe1234

Wear a Condom or pull out next time. .

You can still get a girl pregnant when you pull out. You kids should be practicing TWO forms of birth control (such as birth control pills AND condoms) to avoid "accidents" if you can't keep your hands to yourself.

Haven't you guys had any real sex education, or are they just doing that idiotic "just say no" program these days?

Tiay · #7 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 11:39 PM

hey, I hope it works out for you. You have a whole life ahead of you, and this is just one event, one moment in time; it will pass. If it doesn't, it could be depression.

You are not a bad person- you just made a mistake. If you are Christian, that is, you believe in god, in heaven in hell, etc, then maybe you should go to church and confess.
Personally I think there are better reasons to be a "good person" other than the notion of reward or punishment from above.

Tiay · #8 (**permalink**) 28-05-06, 11:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vashti

Haven't you guys had any real sex education, or are they just doing that idiotic "just say no" program these days?

just about enough to know that you should need a condom, it seems. but hey it was her first time so she can't get pregnant--.. riiight?

DISCLAIMER: the above is a locker room myth ¬.¬

Steven715 · #9 (**permalink**) 29-05-06, 01:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tiay

just about enough to know that you should need a condom, it seems. but hey it was her first time so she can't get pregnant--.. riiight?

DISCLAIMER: the above is a locker room myth ¬.¬

I realey would like to give the person who said that a good pice of my mind what utter crap and what a thing for the youth of today should even hear! it is a pitty all the good thing or the right things dont go about as fast as this sort of thing does!
Edit: It is a shame that thay have had to learn the hard way. I feel for them both

Ellynn · #10 (**permalink**) 29-05-06, 02:41 AM

Unfortunately whenever you have sex your taking a risk of getting pregnant, condom or not... Thats why its important to understand the consequences of sex before you have it.

While my friends were having sex at 15-16, I was a virgin and remained one until I was 20. Why you ask? Because I KNEW i could not handle the consequences in my teens along with facing the WRATH of my Dad....if I would have gotten pregnant.......and even though I lost a few bfs for saying "no", I don't regret my decision to wait. As for my friends....two out of three of them had kids by the time they were 18. I mean they basically gave up their youth at such a young age. My friends don't regret their kids, but with they would have come when they were well into their 20s... Like right about now...

I do give you credit for standing by your gf now. Its the right thing to do. As for an abortion, Its not something I would EVER want to go thru...but I guess its a womans choice. If I were 16, I know for sure I WOULD NOT be ready to raise a child... EVEN now at almost 25 yrs old, I don't think I would be... but now at least I'm to that age where Im more stable etc... If I were to get pregnant now, I would just take responsibility for the child and raise them the best I could...

Best of luck to the both of you...and just be there for her.

Gigabitch · #11 (**permalink**) 29-05-06, 04:49 AM

flurint, you can expect her to be emotional right now. Try to put up with it and stay with her, even if she acts a little crazy. You can always break up later. I think she's making the right decision, even though I think abortion is appalling, because she is way too young to be having a baby, and so are you.

This will probably be the hardest thing you two will have to face for a good, long time, so try to be there for each other and don't have unprotected sex again.

blauw · #12 (**permalink**) 29-05-06, 09:48 AM

In the end u can see this as a relationshiptest ...
It might get u two back closer to eachother!
Myself i'm hoping that u both will

joe1234 · #13 (**permalink**) 29-05-06, 12:31 PM

Ill give you a piece of advise, from now on when it comes to that special time, hide in an air raid shelter

flurint · #14 (**permalink**) 30-05-06, 10:51 AM

thanks every one appreciat it. At the moment we are still together and i do i really want to keep the child if only me and was in the 20's i would keep the baby for sure.

wildadrenaline · #15 (**permalink**) 30-05-06, 02:15 PM

hmmm.. i know it's not nice to say this but i gotta say it. NEVER mess with a virgin! you never know how much it means to a gal & how important it is. *F her & then find an excuse to leave her? oh.. that's like so basket thing to do yea.
since u're bk with her now, i guess she's feeling better. next time when u wanna leave her again, think twice. frankly speaking, u guys are still very young. there's alot to do other than sex. find some other things to cheer your gal up