Break Up Again? - Love Forum

SONOIL · #1 (**permalink**) 02-06-06, 05:02 AM

Ok, now i'm really stumped... My fiance just told me that she's not happy with me nomore. Ok, last time she did that was right after Christmas and she broke up with me, about month after that she called me back and said that she was still in love with me and that she wants me back, so we went back together and everything was fine, we set date for our wedding and she was going to buy dress this week I think, but over the weekend she went to some Christian Camp she came back on Sunday night and started ignoring me since. I mean she was leaving and everything was ok but when she came back, she was complitely changed, I tried to get ahold of her but she was ignoring me. So today I finally got to talk to her and she said that she wasn't happy, that our relatonship isn't going anywhere andstuff like that. Same thing she did last time we were planning for the wedding.... I mean is this another case of "cold feet" or another break up? I'm really really feeling bad now............. pls help...........

Gigabitch · #2 (**permalink**) 02-06-06, 05:14 AM

So that's why you stopped posting a few months ago............

Um, if I remember correctly, she eviscerated you completely last time. Then you took her back... do you think it's possible she met someone new at Christian camp?

Whatever it is, I think you should tell her the wedding's postponed for a year. Put your foot down and get serious about fixing this thing, or at least see whether it's viable or not before you marry her. If she's Christian, she's probably into that whole "submit to your man" thing anyway.

Marriage is pretty easy to get into, and really hard to get out of.

vashti · #3 (**permalink**) 02-06-06, 05:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gigabitch

do you think it's possible she met someone new at Christian camp?

That would be my best guess, too. Anyway, are you sure she is old enough to be thinking about marriage if she is still attending summer camp?

bluestrattos · #4 (**permalink**) 02-06-06, 05:30 AM

I don't think she met someone, in the camp, i think she souffer some kind of "brain wash"! you know, Christian Camp, lots of conversation, a priest or two... conversations where i bet your person was "painted" by thrird-party people, and start doing questions to your fiancé, and at some point she said "you're right!"....
And that's what those kind of people like to ear....

Anyway, i'm almost sure, she will return... i don't know all of your background, but you seems a nice fella, and same as her... i guess

Good luck!

blauw · #5 (**permalink**) 02-06-06, 06:08 AM

I agree with Giga ...

postpone ur wedding for @ least a half year or somethin.
And find out what's wrong by just asking her?

SONOIL · #6 (**permalink**) 02-06-06, 07:34 AM

Well, I asked her what was wrong and she said that she doesn't know, that she's trying to change her life and i'm not, that she's not happy with me.... I mean she didn't say if it was over again, and as a matter a fact i asked her if she still love me and still want to be with me, but she said "You tell me" , I said "No, how about this, you call me when you have an answer" In a mean time she does this thing to me every couple of months or so, she came back to me herself last time, appologized and asked me to take her back, and we were ok for about 5 months and now she's like this again. What is going on with her? Does she have any idea how much it hurts me?

SONOIL · #7 (**permalink**) 06-06-06, 07:34 AM

OK. I called her and told her that i'm tired of this b/s. It's eather she stops screwing with my head and comes to her sences and finishes what we started or I wanr her out. I told her that you have to give me an answer right here, right now, it's either "YES" or "NO"........ and she said "NO"............ well then I told her that it was over and asked for the ring back.........but right now....three days after, i feel so horrible and miserable, and I don't know why..... I just miss her so much already, what is wrong with me? I mean she does all this stuff to me and I feel that I did the right thing, but i feel devastated, and she probably doesn't even think about it..... She was crying when i hung up............

vashti · #8 (**permalink**) 06-06-06, 08:25 AM

You did the right thing. Now it will take some time for you to get through it all. Good luck.

SONOIL · #9 (**permalink**) 06-06-06, 08:35 AM

Oh my.... I'm suffering so much..... I wonder if I did the right thing, after all I love her so much!...... Sounds pretty stupid huh?? But that's the way it is!

bluestrattos · #10 (**permalink**) 06-06-06, 08:55 AM

You did the right thing. Hard, but right. It'll not be easy, after all you're about to spend the rest of your life with her (theorically), you'll not forget her in a day or two. It will take a while.

Good luck!

mhussain · #11 (**permalink**) 06-06-06, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lionos

Oh my.... I'm suffering so much..... I wonder if I did the right thing

Yes you did

Quote:

after all I love her so much!

That is what is causing so much pain

Quote:

...... Sounds pretty stupid huh??

No it doesn't.

Hang in there mate.

SONOIL · #12 (**permalink**) 07-06-06, 04:23 AM

Ok, even thou she said "no" she has a tendency to call back, and play drama queen saying i'm sorry, and sh!t like that. I still love her, like I said, but how can I make her to stay commited if she does come back to me??

icey · #13 (**permalink**) 07-06-06, 12:11 PM

You're doing the right thing dude...I'm in a similar bullshitty situation. My girlfriend can't be happy for more than a week at a time. Always stressing out. It used to be every couple months but she's gotten progressively worse. Oh ya, she'll talk about getting married on a rare occasion, but she starts fights about nothing and then says we fight too much. ??
I got locked in emotionally and three years later here I am. I'm fairly certain the right thing to do is break it off with her.
Think I'll be joining you very soon. My girlfriend is away right now for the summer but will be coming back to visit in a week. I plan on talking to her about this when she gets in.
Stick to your guns Lionos, you are doing the right thing...focus on all the reason why she is WRONG for you and you'll get over her, AND the piece of mind back you had before you met her.

Gigabitch · #14 (**permalink**) 08-06-06, 12:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lionos

Ok, even thou she said "no" she has a tendency to call back, and play drama queen saying i'm sorry, and sh!t like that. I still love her, like I said, but how can I make her to stay commited if she does come back to me??

Sorry.... you can't.