Originally Posted by anhmaimaiyeuvn
Okay, here's the situation:
The Jazz Festival is going to be held this weekend.
Since I don't get to see and talk to her often cause she's always either in her room or had gone out, I want her to accompanying me to the Jazz Festival cause I don't want to go alone (Oh yah I'll be stating this in my letter).
I want to write a letter (...and slip the letter underneath her door) to invite her out, do you think it's a good idea?
urgent reply...pls.
I have read this thread and I am sorry if the advice sounds harsh but I think in the end you will see it is well intentioned.
YOU ARE LACKING CONFIDENCE!
That is NOT sexy to women. You need to take some time to figure out who you are, set some goals in life, understand how to LOVE yourself (warts and all) before you can ever expect anyone to be attracted to you.
David DeAngelo has a CD out called "How to be a man that naturally attracts a woman." It's not hocus pocus or pick up lines. It shows you how to set goals, how to learn to love yourself and how to build confidence and self esteem. It shows you that seeking approval from anyone but yourself is BAD.
This woman is not going to be interested in you. I can tell you that right now because your lack of confidence (just from what I have read) is excrutiatingly painful to watch.
If I were you, I would write down all my positive qualities and start to ingrain them in your mind. Put that list somewhere you can read it every day.
I would spend a lot of time looking at myself in the mirror, remembering those qualities and saying "I am worthy, I have a lot to offer a woman!"
Then write down some small goals and big goals. Use the small goals as stepping stones to help you reach the long term goals. Goal setting and achieving is a GREAT way to build confience and self-esteem.
Stop seeking approval from others. In fact, stop caring at all what anyone else thinks of you. That doesn't mean be a jerk, that means just be happy with who you are.
Don't ever think that you have to spend money on women, buy them gifts or spoil them to get them to like you. In most cases, this causes them to resent you because they can sense that you are doing it to seek their approval -- because you don't think they will like you for who you are.
Bottom line, until you build up your confidence and self-esteem you are not going to get anywhere with this woman.
And don't write her a letter! TALK TO HER. Make good eye contact, be confident and ask her as if she is going to say yes. If she says no, just say "No problem!" smile and walk away. That's it. Don't mope or otherwise be angry at her. Women will constantly test your confidence and you can not fail the test at any one time or you will be OUSTED as a potential mate.
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