Too many ex-boyfriends... - Love Forum

kmaryk · #1 (**permalink**) 27-07-06, 09:21 AM

Hello, all. I've got an issue I'm hoping to get some advice about, or at least a little reassurance. I've had a few boyfriends and I've dumped every single one of them... It's not because I'm a jerk, but I've got this complex and I don't know whether it's normal or not... When the possibility of a relationship with a guy comes up, I get excited and happy, like I'm sure most people do. But when we actually begin to spend time together, (going out, IMing, talking on the phone) I get annoyed with him and begin to begrudge him for taking up so much of my time. I try to avoid him or make excuses not to see him, and eventually I just break things off. Before, I just thought I hadn't found the right guy and that if I found the right guy, I would want to love him and be with him, but this happens with every single guy I have a relationship with. Is this normal or do I have an issue I need to work on? Thanks much for any advice you can give.

vashti · #2 (**permalink**) 27-07-06, 10:21 AM

Is it normal? I'm not sure. People have varying needs with regards to time alone, time together, etc. It could simply be that you are dating people who just don't match your style. How old are you, and how much time are the guys you are dating trying to consume?

kmaryk · #3 (**permalink**) 27-07-06, 10:54 AM

I'm 19. The guys don't really take up that much time, but it annoys me nevertheless. They expect to talk on AIM maybe every other day, but for hours on end. It's like they expect attention that I don't really feel like giving. (Does that make me sound terrible? I think it does...) Other things like dates are pretty usual, but... Well, I would just rather be doing my own thing.

vashti · #4 (**permalink**) 27-07-06, 10:57 AM

I don't think you sound terrible. Then again, I wouldn't want to spend hours on AIM either.

I wouldn't really worry about this for now. YOu are still quite young, and there is no reason to jump to the conclusion that there is a problem when you are simply exercising your right to be free from responsibility. If this remains a problem for you until you are maybe 30, then I might start thinking about it.