I'm 31, she's 28 and a roommate, Can I ask her out on a date,only known her for 3 ds? - Love Forum

anhmaimaiyeuvn · #1 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 07:29 AM

Hi,

I'm 31 and she's about 28, just known her for 2 days (on and off) and she's one of the roommate in the house.

I had a good chat with her today, she's single - attractive and very down to earth - and I really admire her for her hard work, morality and tradition. I think I'm in love again.

I want to ask her out on a date before it's too late cause she's planning to move out the end of the month cause the place is too noisy for her.

I was very nice to her today and she kinda accepted my offer of food and so on.
In contrast, she related this to the aunt whom doesn't care much about her.

She's experiencing pressure to get married and I'm too.

Whatever you call it, may it be infatuation/intense feeling of love/ in love/ admiration:

I just know in my heart I really love her. She doesn't demand much in life and I don't too.

So, Should I ask her out ? Do you think it's the right thing to do?

bluesummer · #2 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 08:02 AM

Wow, why don't you just relax and get to know her a little first?

anhmaimaiyeuvn · #3 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 09:12 AM

Bluesummer,

I'm really desperate to have a gf, someone I can share my feelings with.
I never dated anyone before and I've missed so many chances before cause I was always afraid to talk to girls. Now she's closer to me and I can talk with her privately.
I don't know what to do, I don't want to see her go and miss her. You know what I mean.

blacksun · #4 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 11:39 AM

yeah desprate == bad relax and get to know her better, if you screw it up it will be aukward for a loooong time

Illusional · #5 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 11:51 AM

haha you're in love after knowing her for two days?? and that's not even the funniest part. you admire her for her hard work?? i'm sure that it's hard work to move in with all those huge boxes and what not.

however, being that she IS moving out, it would be a good idea to keep in touch with her if you want to further something her. shit, why not hit it before she leaves then there will be no strings attatched. j/k. but honestly, do something.

raverboy

bluesummer · #6 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 01:22 PM

OK, but don't be sooooooo desperate for a girlfriend that you throw yourself at her. It's going to freak her out. Really, if a guy who I'd known for three days came to me and told me he loved me, I probably would keep my distance from him........permanently.

Just because she's moving out of the house doesn't mean she's moving to another planet. Spend some time with her while she's still living there, and then make sure you keep in touch when she leaves. See where it goes.

Don't start falling for every girl you meet just because you're "desperate for a gf" or "feeling pressure to get married" either. That's not the best way to find a compatible partner.

anhmaimaiyeuvn · #7 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 06:55 PM

I guess all of you are right,

but guys/gals,

I can just feel that she needs somebody to love her right now.
When I asked her about bf thingy, she started telling me about in her country "all the men are so old and have families"...then she said she's single now...then we got all silent and making eye-contacts and all that.
You know what I mean? It's just one of those moment when you can feel the heat of the moment, the chemistry and the love between us.

I don't know how to describe it but at that momemt I was going to just ask her out on a date or if she wanted me?
It was a stupid logic, I know, so I didn't go further. Any thoughts?

Frasbee · #8 (**permalink**) 16-07-06, 11:26 PM

Do not ask, if she wants you.

Don't leave the decision up to her.

Tell her you want to go on a date with her.

But don't make it a question, make it a statement.

anhmaimaiyeuvn · #9 (**permalink**) 17-07-06, 12:01 AM

Thx Frasbee,

I'll try to keep it in mind. However, a lot of time I'm not sure how to word
my questions/statements.

"I want to go on a date with you" -- is anyway to make it sound lighter, like just to be friend with her, but let her know I'm interested in her? The reason I'm saying this is because I don't want to scare her in anyway, ie bf or relationship, given that I've just known her for a few days.

Frasbee · #10 (**permalink**) 17-07-06, 12:09 AM

No, there isn't.

Those are all the words you need.

Clear, concise and to the point.

anhmaimaiyeuvn · #11 (**permalink**) 17-07-06, 01:42 AM

So no questions then?

What happens if she doesn't say anything?

Is it appropriate to ask then? Or should I make it a statement and just forget about it and say "I understand" and move on.

Gigabitch · #12 (**permalink**) 18-07-06, 01:22 AM

Look, do you want her to know that you've never dated before? Quit being such a weenie. If she really needs someone to love her right now, why are you assuming rejection before it's even occured?

Ask her out, with confidence. If she turns you down, then you should post here about it- you'll have answers in minutes.

Go ask her out right now and tell us what happens.

anhmaimaiyeuvn · #13 (**permalink**) 18-07-06, 09:45 AM

Actually, I just realize that I know several girls and only known them just some time.
I love them all, and I'm afraid to ask anyone of them out.
Giga...I think I'm just going to keep it as friendship until the time is right for me then I will ask for a date. For now, I can endure this sick pain I'm having.

Thx for all your insights...however, you won't hear the last of me, that's for sure!

vashti · #14 (**permalink**) 18-07-06, 10:09 AM

I don't think dating a roommate is a good idea at all, unless you have known them for a long time and have established mutual admiration. BTW - two days is not a long time.

Gigabitch · #15 (**permalink**) 18-07-06, 11:41 PM

Jeeze Louise, ask somebody out, would you? It's painful for me, and I'm only hearing about it...