Need some help

[Louie]

Ok i need some help on gettin a girl to go out with me.... shes been flirting with me for about 2 week or so at work (I work at target and so does she).... and i was wondering how i should ask her out. I'm not really good at this so i'm asking for advice from girls because i really like her and would hate to screw this up.... It took me a month just for us to become friends.... she didn't really pay much attention to me and now she pays a lot of attention to me.... more than the other guys at work... so i'm not sure if she likes me more than a friend or what, but my friends say she does.... sigh... why does love have to be like this. so if you could give me some advice on what to do so i don't screw up that would be great.

Things i've done so far:

1) Listen to her (hard but i do my best)
2) Make it look like i'm not intrested in her so she tries to get me (thats what a girl said to do)

So now all i think i need to do is pop the question... right? or am i wrong... plz help me.

[lemonade69]

Quote:

Originally posted by Louie


So now all i think i need to do is pop the question... right? or am i wrong.

how can you be wrong? i think you already know what you have to do...remember, you already have it easy cos you already know she likes you! now go do it!!

[GigaloDJ]

My gosh! I need to fix you up in so many areas!

Hmmm where to start?

Well first of all if you keep calling her your "friend" you will not get very far.

There is no "pop the question". That is marriage.
You must TELL her. You must TAKE!
DO NOT say "would you like to go out with me?"
That is like digging your own grave.
Say "give me your number".
Say "let's go out Friday night." (Of coarse see if she is free first)

Stop giving her so much damn attention!

Oh yeah one more thing. If you screw up: Fvck it!
Listen: You have a very long way to go. (We all still do) Rejection will happen hundreds of times along the way. One thing is for sure: You will only learn from your experiences and you will learn to ignore rejection in the same way you ignore that you cannot be named the King of the moon.

Confuse her. Be an @sshole for a day. Don't talk to her for a day. Be cool (never a "nice guy") will her.

You should confuse her before trying to get her number because you have already made many mistakes.

Good luck bro!

-GigaloDJ

[sfalexi]

Yeah. It's best to "tell" a girl out. That sort of leaves them without the option of declining. It also tends to catch them offguard since I guess not many people use it. Something like, "Let's go see [name of movie] this weekend. I really want to see that one." It gives them the entire weekend so they really can't play the "I'm busy that night" card, and leaves them open to negotiate a time. Then afterwards you get her number and tell her you'll call her later. Call her, ask where to pick her up, and after the movie tell her you're hungry and if she doesn't mind getting a bite to eat.

Of course it doesn't have to be a movie, but that's a classic line used in a good form. It could be anything. Ice skating, local concert, (I wouldn't recommend clubbing unless you're a really strong dancer cause you don't want to embarress the hell out of yourself on a first date), rock climbing, cafe with music or poetry, mini golf, etc.

Best to find a place that you can talk (which is also why movies aren't good) cause you need to be able to talk and hold a conversation. If you go to a movie, and drop her off, that's not a date. She could've done that and had just as much "fun" with anyone. You need a place where you can continue your flirting and get to know her a bit. Make sure that she's someone you want to date. If not, then you know not to make future plans, and if so, continue taking her out and getting to know her better. And better. And better. And then one night . . . . best.

Alexi

[BuzzLiteBeer]

well, you said you had to try hard to listen to her...does this mean she's boring? if so, she is not worth your time. and yes, making it look like you're not interested goes a long way (and so does jealousy...have you every seen her talking to another guy? maybe flirting? you know what i mean, you want her more)

[Louie]

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does this mean she's boring?

No its she just talks TOO much..... WAY TOO much... i mean she talks more than my freakin professor at college.

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Stop giving her so much damn attention!

I'm not... I did what you said (be an asshole type of thing)... thats how I got her to pay so much attention to me.

Quote:

It's best to "tell" a girl out.

Now this is hard because she doesn't like going out and doing stuff (the one thing i learned form listening), and i live in a small town which doesn't help by really limiting what there is to do.

Any ideas on what i could ask her to go out and do?? movie and dinner.... she says she hates the restraunts here... and theres no movies she wants to see.... so i'm lost in what i could ask her to go do.

[sfalexi]

Quote:

Any ideas on what i could ask her to go out and do?? movie and dinner.... she says she hates the restraunts here... and theres no movies she wants to see.... so i'm lost in what i could ask her to go do.

I just listed a bunch of things above. If worst comes to worst, take her somewhere that YOU want to go to. Just make a place where you can talk to her. That way you get to know her so she's not completely bored, and if she turns out to be a dud, at least you didn't waste your night since you went somewhere YOU like.

As far as her "hating" to go out, means she's usually free. Do you know why she doesn't go out much? Does she never have a good time? Is she afraid of the outside world and feel safe while huddled within her own four walls? Why don't you get her to go out, and make that one point of conversation. At least it'll kill some time.

Quote:

No its she just talks TOO much..... WAY TOO much... i mean she talks more than my freakin professor at college.

And you think that's not going to annoy you if you have to hear her talk every day while you two are dating? If you dislike her "talking" habits, they're going to wear you down till you can't STAND talking to her and dread every phone call. And so I advise not even trying to date her. There's plenty of fish in the sea, and since in order to have a relationship you really should TALK with the other person, find one you wouldn't mind talking with on a day to day basis.

Alexi

[lemonade69]

Quote:

Originally posted by GigaloDJ

Confuse her. Be an @sshole for a day. Don't talk to her for a day. Be cool (never a "nice guy") will her.

that is one thing i'll never understand. why do guys think that being an asshole will get a girl to be more interested in you? being a girl myself i read that as the guy is not interested in me. even if you do manage to get her she'll always remember what an asshole you could be, and if there is ever a problem in the relationship, she'll more than likely hold it against you and think 'well he was an asshole anyway, to hell with this one, i'll just move on to the next'.

being cool and seeming to be less interested however could work wonders. we want what we can't have right? you just need to know where to draw the line so the level of indifference does not become offensive and gives out the wrong message. akin to 'asking' her out and digging your own grave, this is like shooting yourself in the foot, esp if you are not the only one who is interested in her. (of course all this is better than being the 'nice guy', which means he'll never be more than a friend anyway).

of course, all this is just my opinion, though i do quote from a very attractive friend of mine..."asshole behaviour is a turn-off"

[Louie]

Quote:

why do guys think that being an asshole will get a girl to be more interested in you?

Don't ask me.. but don't be a TURE asshole... just blow her off... the little things... for some odd reason it makes them want you.. instead of the other way around... and plus when a girl tells you to do it, there has to be a good reason.... i'll never understand it, but if it works then it works.

Quote:

I just listed a bunch of things above.

Yes you did... but we have none of that shit.... my town is a SMALL town... and she moved from a way bigger town... I know how that feels because i moved for LA to here... SO different, but after 6 years i got used to it... not sure how long shes been here.. but theres not much to do in this town... about the only thing is to go to the mall (which sucks so much ass but is about the only thing we have in this sucky town and we work there).

[sfalexi]

Ummm . . . how about cow tipping?

[Louie]

umm how about no... this isn't a hick town... just a town made for old people really (retirement)... thats it... nice and out of the way from everything... great if i just wanted to get away and spend time with her.... bad if you wanted to do something.

[Zekk_T_Strife]

Hey now, I know where some cows are about a mile or two away from here and I don't live in a hick town.

[jane]

hhmmmm...

[LightOn]

You say she talks a lot, so it's possible something like this may be said.

Her: I hate this boring town or I don't like going out, I am bored.....etc

Louie: Thats because you haven't been/hung out with me yet!

Her: Why do you say that? or something similar to that.

Louie: You will just have to find out wont you?

End the convo there to give her space to wonder what is going on.

Now you said there is not much to do in your town. What do you do with guy friends of yours to have fun? Remember things don't HAVE to be perfect, they just have to be interesting and fun. You can even make a car ride exciting for anyone.

[jane]

oh lighton ... your such a flirt!