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Old 06-10-06, 05:08 PM
persiancat persiancat is offline
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can different culture be come over?
hi, my boyfriend is European and I am Asian. We live in the different city, different country. We are the business partner in the past time. Then we fell in love. He will move here or I will move to his city if everything goes well. But I am not so brave to this relation as everyone in my side against it. Everyone tells me that we have no future. We birthed in different country and growed up with different culture. I believe if we could be open and allowence to each other, we could conqure the problem in our life.

Who can give me some suggestion to my relation?
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Old 06-10-06, 05:15 PM
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Originally Posted by persiancat View Post
hi, my boyfriend is European and I am Asian. We live in the different city, different country. We are the business partner in the past time. Then we fell in love. He will move here or I will move to his city if everything goes well. But I am not so brave to this relation as everyone in my side against it. Everyone tells me that we have no future. We birthed in different country and growed up with different culture. I believe if we could be open and allowence to each other, we could conqure the problem in our life.

Who can give me some suggestion to my relation?
It can be difficult sometimes as you have completly different upbringings. Completely different cultures. I can't say personally but I do have a colleague who is Irish and he is married to a Japanese lady. They have lived in Japan for 8 yrs now and they appear to be happy.

However when I visit I see how he has had to change his ways and so has she. But they both are very comprimising and try to understand their different ways.

I'm sure it was a struggle a t first but they seem happy

Sorry I can't be of more help
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Old 06-10-06, 07:56 PM
Henry123 Henry123 is offline
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(I hope you can trust this person very well. Not to scare you I have heard of women going off to different countries only to be kidnapped and being sold into sex slavery. Be careful.)

I think you first need is communication in a relationship (I'm not just talking about language wise). You need to sit down with him and discuss that both of you need to be flexible and understand that both of you have different cultural habits. And that both of you will try to be flexible and compromise with one another.
Divorce rates are quite high. It wont be easy. But I have heard of people in from different cultures doing well with each other. The younger both of you are the more easily for both of you to adjust to your differences.
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Old 06-10-06, 08:10 PM
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I think it also depends on where in Asia you come from and where in Europe he come's from. It's a bit too vague and there are alot of different religions/cultures/customs in both regions

For example Australia is in Asia and half the population there are descendants of ex convicts from Ireland & England [The other half being perfectly normal] so of much the same culture.
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Old 07-10-06, 09:07 AM
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Persiancat if you two live in America, Canada or Australia interacial/interethnic relationships are quite common. Its quite normal and you and your friend would fit in well. Something you two might want to consider.

Here's a book for you:
Mixed Matches: How to Create Successful Interracial, Interethnic, and Interfaith Relationships by Joel Crohn, Ph. D.
http://www.alibris.com/search/search...LV8ptgZQ_ZzxHg




Some interesting articles

http://www.news.cornell.edu/stories/...uples.ssl.html

http://www.askheartbeat.com/html/survey7.html


interracial website
http://home.att.net/~grantburger/
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Old 07-10-06, 09:48 AM
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Henry you're a mine of information

But I think an interracial relationship with two people who have lived within the USA for a period is alot different from what is being discussed
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Old 07-10-06, 09:55 AM
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My brother (American) is married to a girl from Japan. They seem fine, but our family is very open to different cultures. I don't know about her family; they are still in Japan.

I think the Western world is generally very open to Asian culture.
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Old 07-10-06, 10:06 AM
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I think the Western world is generally very open to Asian culture.
Obviously. That's where they get all of their games 'n shit from.
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Old 08-10-06, 10:30 PM
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Henry you're a mine of information
Thanks Derm.

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... I think an interracial relationship with two people who have lived within the USA for a period is alot different from what is being discussed
Yeah you might be right.
I do think they still have a chance at making it work (I try to be optimistic on this).
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Old 09-10-06, 03:15 AM
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What would be most important is for you to understand the other relations that each of you have, other than each other. For example, family, siblings, close freinds and so on..

While the expectation is that two of you would be giving eachother happiness through your life, when there are other relations coming into your world, that is where the culture and the hoopla around it brings its problems.

While the two of you know that you love each other, even the definition or belief on how to treat your partner can be very different in your bigger belief systems. Hence, I would for beginners suggest you to take a vacation with him. Speak a lot with each other on the expectations (keep it grounded and not lofty romantic ones) and then thinkg logically about you guys moving cities and lifes.
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