i need some help with a few issues i have

[Arx_Fatalis]

well lets start, i just started dating this girl her, i think she's great, she's a year and a few months older than me, she's 19 almost 20, i'll be turning 19 in two weeks.

now ever since i can remember i've always been one of those guys that always think the worst things possible, and for the past three relationships its been horrid, on my attitude and on my relationships.

i always get the sneaking suspicion that if a girl im dating goes to hang out with any guy friends, that it automatically means she's problably screwing with them and ever since i can remember, even at a very young age i've had this problem, where i alway's over analyze things.

let me go into my current situation a bit more, i just started dating this girl two day's ago, and the weird thing about it is that we're almost completely different but on a certain level we both enjoy it, but the thing that bothers me is that she's a recovered drug addict, now i fully believe that people can recover and by the looks of her it looks like she's done a great job.

but here is my concern, so far from what she's told me of herself in the past i know she's got a pretty wild background and at times i guess she could be wild.

what i want to accomplish here is getting these lingering feelings out of my mind so i can be at peace and not keep looking behind myself to see if this girl or ANY other girl may be doing me wrong, i hate feeling this way, and honestly i seem to know in my mind that she's not doing me wrong but i get into these periods of time where i seem to get depressed if she's talking to another guy about hanging out with them, she seems to have alot of guy and girl friends.

but in my past experiences and from being a guy myself, i know most men arent able to be "just friends" especially to an attractiv woman, so can anyone help me get rid of this condition, so i can be happy and stop thinking the worst, i feel like im being ripped apart by this!

[Cain]

You're going to have to just realize that not all women are out to get you. This is something YOU have to do. We don't have a magical bit of advice that will fix you. You'll have to be the one to work on your insecurities.

And you really need to, because this will prevent you from ever having a stable relationship.

[mtinlove]

Arx, its just an insecurity. I had it at the beginning of my relationship I am in now (this is my first serious relationship). I still sometimes fall back into the insecurity of whether or not hes talking to people in his past (he has a wild one as well) Honestly...you just have to learn to trust and get over it at times, as harsh as that sounds I still tell myself that. Its not easy I wont lie but you will eventually start feeling more comfortable. I hope all goes well for you.

[Gigabitch]

A wild background doesn't necessarily mean she's untrustworthy. In fact, it might be a good thing, as she won't have much curiosity about what it would be like to jump on your friends.

This isn't really about her background, though, and I know you know it. It's about you, and the best thing you can do is to work on yourself, make yourself feel worthy and confident.

So, what do you like best about yourself?

[Arx_Fatalis]

what i like best would be that, i treat girls right, i've never raised a hand at them, i've always been sweet, also i've always offered help when needed, a good example is my girlfriend just got in a fight with her parents, her father hit her, i had to work the next day but to cheer her up, i took her to the movies and to a friends, i spent nearely the whole night with her before i took her home.

though i was very very very tired for work the next day, i was glad i had done it because it made her happy.

[Cain]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arx_Fatalis

what i like best would be that, i treat girls right, i've never raised a hand at them, i've always been sweet, also i've always offered help when needed, a good example is my girlfriend just got in a fight with her parents, her father hit her, i had to work the next day but to cheer her up, i took her to the movies and to a friends, i spent nearely the whole night with her before i took her home.

though i was very very very tired for work the next day, i was glad i had done it because it made her happy.

Since I'm not and most likely will never be in that situation, I can't say for sure what I'd do. However, if my girlfriend's father hit her, I'd be going to his house to do a little hitting of my own.