Poll: Dating for the sake of dating? - Love Forum

jfett85 · #1 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 04:44 AM

I've been single for about a month now and I'm having a little moral dilemma. My last relationship lasted about 10 months and I definitely loved her but it just wasn't the right circumstances at the time. There is a chance we could get back together but it wouldn't be for a while so I'm not just gonna sit around waiting for that. Anyways...

I really enjoy being in a relationship. Having someone in my life like that always brings out the best in me and makes everything so much more enjoyable. I've got friends, yea, but I miss the dates, the talks on the phone, those kinds of things. And it's not sex I miss, I plan on waiting til marriage so that's not a factor. So here's my question. Is it better to stay single until you meet someone you really have feelings for, or would you seek out someone to date just for the sake of having somone to date?

Thanks
jfett

squirrley · #2 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 04:50 AM

I personally wouldnt date just to date...I stayed single for almost 5 years to avoid that scenario...I knew when it was time to open myself again...but everyone has their own ideas on dating...if youre feeling like youve got voids to fill those dating experiences are going to be empty, meaningless, and not healthy. Not to say a number of women could get hurt in the process...I would look to yourself and see what it is you want...a meaningful deep relationship or just a bunch of random dates...but then again how are you going to get that deep thing going if you dont date? Guess it depends on where you are with YOUR life and what you want!!

sfalexi · #3 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 07:17 AM

I'm with you Jfett. VERY similar situation. Almost down the T. (except for the part of you wanting to wait until you're married). I don't. I haven't had sex yet, because I want sex to be part of a meaningful relationship, but I don't want to wait till marriage.

I voted Date for the sake of dating. Dating is fun. It's two people going out, having a good time, getting to know each other. And like Squirrel pointed out, how are you going to GET that deep thing without dating? Just cause you date doesn't mean you have to 'put out' or you're trash. You're just dating. Having fun. Enjoying the company of what COULD turn into a possible relationship. I'm of the mindset now (after what I went through) that I want to date. I want to go out there and see what girls are like. I KNOW I'll run into girls that don't compliment me at all. I know that I'll run into girls that I think compliment me well, but maybe they will not like ME all that much. But I'm willing to do all that just for the experience. Just to be able to have some fun, and learn more about what I'm looking for in a girl and I'll probably learn more about myself along the way too.

So I'm all set to be going to the bars, clubs, cafes, singles dances, whatever. I have my 'wingmen' all set up and I'll be hitting up those places and (hopefully, unless some stupid shyness gets me that night) talkin' to the womenz. Maybe set up a few dates! We'll see . . .

Alexi

Clifton · #4 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 08:56 AM

Well, as they say, you cant find love, it finds you. So the only real reason id see to be dating, is to have fun, and ****..if that interests you then go for it..most people have that attitude towards dating anyway

Fawn · #5 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 08:54 AM

I'm in agreement with Clifton...

I like to go out and alot of the time I don't get to see my friends because there busy with work. So if I get the chance to go out and have some fun, even if I may not be totally emotionally involved with the guy, its still a time to go out and have fun. Also, one of those dates could surprise you and you'll end up liking him more and more.