long distance dating - Love Forum

prosejunkie · #1 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 07:03 AM

What do you guys think about long distance dating? This guy that I was pretty interested in 3 years ago has suddenly popped back into my life, but we go to different schools, about a 5 hour drive away, or 45 min flight. He's also going abroad this summer, so I won't see him again until August.

Is it worth pursuing?

PandaCivic · #2 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 08:01 AM

i say it is. with exceptions. if it's only 5 hours away, you can still have a compromise of visiting each other every other weekend. the effort should be met by both of you. if one of you doesn't want to put in all that time and driving, it won't be worth it. or you can keep in touch online as well. it helps to let the other person know you think about them even if they are 100s of miles away.

sfalexi · #3 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 08:22 AM

I wouldn't do long distance dating. If I alread had a solid relationship and something FORCED me to do long distance dating (work relocation while they couldn't relocate due to school or something quite yet) then I'd give it a try. But I would never try to START something long distance. Too wierd for me. I'd like them to be around while I'm getting to know them.

Rod Steele

squirrley · #4 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 08:32 AM

yo yo Rod Steele-I never thought Id start a long distance thingy but I have and the only thing that sucks is that we dont get to spend daily things together but spend a ton of time talking everyday...I do miss him being next to me...but Im glad I got involved I really am-because even though we may not "see" eachother everyday everyday I get to know more about him...and its great-its also kept us in check.

If youre already in a relationship and forced to seperate you can make it work-but you both have to be willing to put forth the effort into making it work...its all in what its worth to you that person how important they are to you...

Breezy18 · #5 (**permalink**) 15-06-04, 09:42 AM

Rod Steele.....that's cool, Alexi, you so crazy! LOL

I agree with Alexi. I had a long distance relationship. I thought I knew who he was but it was so deceiving. I think I'd like my bf to be around me more, so I can learn his little idiosyncracies, and him mine. And when something AMAZING happens I want to be able to call whenever I feel like it and share that. Or better yet, go over to HIS place and share it. But since you already KNOW this person, it throws it into quite a different light. If you feel it's something you want with him, then I'd try it. What have you got to lose afterall?
P.S. had to edit THIS post too! Man! I gotta slow down my typing! lol

MisINdpndT · #6 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 02:13 AM

just IMO i would but thats just me...

Clifton · #7 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 03:12 AM

Well, if you are BOTH willing to put in the effort it takes to work through the distance, it is worth persueing, as long as you can trust the other person enough to not worry about them cheating on you..since youd never know

prosejunkie · #8 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 03:43 AM

Well since he's leaving in two days I have high hopes for an e-mail friendship, I guess. I don't think he'll have normal internet access there. We're not even seeing each other, I've just been thinking about it. Hopefully, he has too.

I was just thinking a few days ago about how I screwed it up years ago with him, and all of a sudden, bam, there he is, hanging out with my best friend.

I dunno. I will keep you guys posted, I guess. Thanks for all your help. You guys are awesome

sfalexi · #9 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 03:53 AM

Maybe what you should do is maintain contact with the hopes that if you haven't been able to find a good relationship by the time he returns, at least you have maintained the friendship and don't have to start at square one or even pick up 'where you left off'. You can be AHEAD in the game.

But I suggest in the meantime still going out and not turning down guys. Cause you never know what you might pass up.

Rod Steele

Fawn · #10 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 09:50 AM

Well, from experience I found it rather annoying. I personally don't think its a good idea because theres alot of stress that can go on.

I guess theres just something about being in a relationship with someone thats close by. I mean; the touch of the person; being able to see them whenever you want to; going on romantic dates; not having to wait to feel the touch of there lips upon yours; ooo.... I wouldn't be able to stand it if my guy was far away....

*daydreams of lovely thoughts* *grabs bf and gets freaky* lol!

squirrley · #11 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 08:55 PM

Ok for me it kinda sucks because I dont get to hug him everyday-

there are a lot of things I cant do...but for now I look forward to seeing him when I can-builds excitement knowing that in a few days we'll be together again!

The everyday things arent with us-the phone calls and aims but its not the same for sure...but I wouldnt toss this aside because of the distance right now-thats the beauty of being adults-we can actually make decisions for ourselves...and who knows...

But there are good points in long distance-you appreciate the person a ton more-and dont take things for granted...trust is built...bonds become stronger-etc...it all depends on how much you truly care for that person and if youre willing to make the effort...I for one AM!

Clifton · #12 (**permalink**) 16-06-04, 09:08 PM

Well said squirlly

Sami09 · #13 (**permalink**) 17-06-04, 02:21 AM

Personaly it would be really hard i was away from my bf for two weeks we did keep in touch on email and a few phone calls. If you are committed to it i guess it would be okay but also really hard not seeing him and kiss and hugging him.

RainbowKiss_83 · #14 (**permalink**) 17-06-04, 07:43 AM

I don't think anybody can determine for you if it's worth it or not. Only you know how you feel in your heart. He might be worth it and he might not be. I don't think you should dismiss the idea just because your situations right now aren't ideal, especially if you really like him. I've had an online/long distance relationship for three years and while it would have been much more ideal for us to let each other go and find someone closer, it was worth it to hold on and keep trying. Being with him was very fullfilling. We've recently broken up, but I don't regret the last 3 years at all. Love is not always ideal.

KaWaiiSkYe · #15 (**permalink**) 17-06-04, 11:22 PM

I would say that I'm committed to my long distance dating. I hate it when I can't see him like his friends and their dates can. I hate the fact that when I'm upset I don't have him around to hold onto. You get my point. I won't see him for 3 months after this Saturday. It's goin' to be one long lonely summer for me 5000 miles away from him. But when the summer holiday's gone and I'm back in England and I see him again. It will feel so special. Ahh well. Y'all know what I mean. Hmm.. But then again.. That's just us.