I am in love with one of my best friends. We started out as more than friends but she broke up with me because it was moving too fast and she was scared of getting hurt. She is really shy and insecure, as well as underconfident and was hurt really badly by her first and only boyfriend.
After we broke up we drifted apart for a while. (I later found out that she was in fact in love with me and was scared by that, that she was so close on a lot of occassions to trying to get back with me but then when she heard about me with other girls she thought i didnt care anymore)
Then about 3 weeks ago we started talking a lot again. We became really close friends. Like literally talking for hours and hours on the phone. Our conversation was friendly and very flirty at times, reminising about what it was like to kiss eachother. Then she found out i had a girlfriend. She seemed very jealous and asked me loads about her. Anyway, i broke up with my girlfriend mainly because i thought it was unfair to be going out with her when i was in love with my best friends.
Problem is, the girl i'm in love with lives like 20 miles away. There is a train link in between our cities. But anytime ive suggested hanging out (strictly as friends) she has seemed a bit hesitant. Yet, when i said i might not see her for ages, she seemed really disapointed. In other words, she gives conflicting signals. But i feel the only way i can rekindle this flame is by seeing her again. (We havnt met since the breakup like 3 months ago)
So i was considering just getting the train to her. Turning up in her city and saying im there and that i figured it was time to meet again. She is the sort of girl who is just waiting to be swept off her feet.
My problem is, how do i do this?? I would normally have no possibly alibi to go to her town. Only her. Also, if i mention in advance she is the kinda girl who might make an excuse not to meet me (just cos shes so self conscious and underconfident, especially if she likes me from our phone chats).
But i need to see her! So what could i do? How could i play this?
- Phone her up and tell her i have a few hours to kill so i was going to come down and see her?
- Phone her up when i arrive in her town?
- Talk about it before? (With the liklihood of her trying to get out of it)
By the way, her hesitation at meeting up isnt a sign of low interest. Its just literally cos shes extreamily self conscious around guys and has low self esteem. So i was just thinkin of turning up as a friend and surprising her? Good idea? Would it freak her out? How could i arrange it beforehand with the best chance of her saying yes? Help please?
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