Whats the status of this relationship? - Love Forum

BankyTheHack · #1 (**permalink**) 08-07-04, 05:11 PM

OK just a little over a month ago I had a first date with a 23 year old woman (I'm only 18) who is totally out of my league. The date went really well and we ended up going back to her friends place (where shes staying because she just moved here) to fool around. Well after that she walked me to my car and kissed me goodnight. Then about 3am the day after next she gives me a booty call and we go and fool around some more. Then the next day we just got some drive thru and hung out and talked for a while and kissed goodbye and left. Then I didnt get to talk to her for about a week, then I dropped her an email to which she replied "I've been busy with job interviews, but now everything should work out now that I'll be working, I hope to see you soon....Real soon." So a few days later she IMs me, wanting to hang out and get some more drive thru (taco bell :p) and we go back to her friends place again and hang out and talk, she mentions says "we should do something sunday night" so I say sure and once again we kiss goodnight. But unfortunatly she wasnt feeling good sunday so I just told her to rest and we'll go out another time.

So my question is, what does this relationship sound like? Its definitly seems to be more than a physical or "friends with benefits" relationship, but shes also doesnt seem to be trying to use me (I mean jeez I dont think I've spent more than $25 bucks on her). I havent had a relationship that seemed to be working out in quite a while, so I'm probably a little jaded and blind.

Killerbabe · #2 (**permalink**) 08-07-04, 06:24 PM

I think it's all great for now, but what you should find out is if she's seeing anyone else meanwhile. Not that you should worry, but if she does than maybe she's just having a good time. I say, give it time and you'll see. There's really not much you should worry about now, because obviously if it doesn't work out you're not going to be super upset or heart-broken. For now, you shouldn't even worry about all that relationship stuff because those are the best times - you can just unwind and relax and have a good time without worrying about your feeling since you don't really have any yet. It's just a tingling anticipation, which everyone enjoys.

bivio · #3 (**permalink**) 08-07-04, 07:48 PM

Try looking at her as your casual sex partner. Meaning you have the relationship of a couple but it's nothing serious. See if the relationship between you works out but just be prepared for heart ache. The relationship seems okay to me but she is 23 like you said and she isn't going to commit as much due to the age difference. I hate to put a downer on you but try and look as it as a casual relationship and just enjoy the moments you do share

Bivio

Killerbabe · #4 (**permalink**) 08-07-04, 08:12 PM

Hm. I don't think age should be an issue. I mean at least it's not that big of an issue. I know lots of guys that marry girls a couple years older, and it's no big deal. As long as they're mentally and physically on the same level.

BankyTheHack · #5 (**permalink**) 09-07-04, 01:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Killerbabe

Hm. I don't think age should be an issue. I mean at least it's not that big of an issue. I know lots of guys that marry girls a couple years older, and it's no big deal. As long as they're mentally and physically on the same level.

I agree Killerbabe, in fact shes the only person I have ever "dated" where I could actually have an intellectually stimulating conversation with.

PandaCivic · #6 (**permalink**) 09-07-04, 06:23 AM

marry her.

Cybog · #7 (**permalink**) 13-07-04, 01:37 PM

Could be worse...

I dated a 23 year old for about 6 months way back in the day....

I was 16...

Anyhow, whats the status on this one Banky?

BankyTheHack · #8 (**permalink**) 13-07-04, 01:50 PM

LOL my brother dated a 28 year old when he was 16, so I'm not surprised. Still dont know on the status though....

Anthony · #9 (**permalink**) 13-07-04, 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bivio

Try looking at her as your casual sex partner. Meaning you have the relationship of a couple but it's nothing serious. See if the relationship between you works out but just be prepared for heart ache.

This was my impression as well.

I don't believe there's any harm in being in a relationship with an older woman, however from your description, it seems to me that she's more interested in having a good time than participating in a serious relationship.

If you're interested in something more than the "friends with benefits" you mentioned, I would suggest that you talk to her and try to find out what her actual intentions are for the relationship. It may turn out negatively, although at least you would save yourself a potention let-down in the future.

bivio · #10 (**permalink**) 13-07-04, 07:45 PM

Second to that^^